Hot Slut Of The Day!

August 5, 2012 / Posted by:

Paperboy from the Paperboy video game!

Watching the trailer for that beautiful white trash extravaganza The Paperboy reminded me of the video game I played for hours upon hours as a kid and never ever won. I sucked at that shit. The Paperboy video game was released on Atari first, I think, but I had the Nintendo version. (Side note: Remember when your Nintendo game would freeze up and so you’d pull out the cartridge and blow on it, thinking there was dust or other shit caught inside of it? You thought you were a real technical genius for coming up with the blow method. Remember that? You don’t? Okay, I guess it was just me then…)

The Paperboy video game was as basic as basic can be. You’d ride up the street and try to deliver newspapers while annoying hos like a runaway lawnmower and a brat on a Big Wheel got in your way. This is The Paperboy they should’ve made a full-length movie about. Zac Efron could’ve played the Paperboy, Nicole Kidman could’ve played a crazed horny slut who’s always trying to piss on his face and Matthew McConaughey could’ve played himself, a Texas T-Rex who keeps trying to bite at Paperboy’s back wheel. Make this happen, Hollywood!

In the meantime, hold your head as your mind boggles over Paperboy’s Avatar-like special effects!

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