Friday, August 3rd 2012

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER For August 2nd!

Now that Times Square is all cleaned up and family-friendly, this is the only kind of big organ you'll find in a dark alley. - turnelbup

Runners-up:

"That bitch left my heart in the gutter" --Robert Pattinson to UsWeekly - LaPerlaDelSur

Dateline tracks down Kunty K.'s long abandoned heart. Heart was mildly successful working at Donatella's virgin blood bank, but the Zantax habit caught up with him. - Cuntina

Emoticons even brighten up the most grimy graffiti messages. - RHONYC

via Break

Posted by: Michael K
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tiny monkey's picture
Submitted by tiny monkey on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:11pm.

Down at the end of Lonely Street, the Heartbreak Hotel debuts their new spokesperson.

Submitted by chimichanga on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:10pm.

Shady Alley's Lonely Hearts Old Man

Submitted by etpiro on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:10pm.

The ronery heart crub band

RHONYC's picture
Submitted by RHONYC on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:08pm.

black market emoticon

Submitted by dinger on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:06pm.

Even the folks working the black market have had to resort to desperate sales strategies. This "heart"working individual passses out coupons for half off hearts, spleens and kidneys.

ImpertinentVixen's picture
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:03pm.

Unfortunately, Mrs. Lochte is not aware that THIS is the one-night stand her son is into.

·...¸><((((º>·´¯`·. ¸.><((((º> .·´¯`·..·><((((º>
Visit The Freckle on Lindsay Lohan's Lip on Facebook.

RHONYC's picture
Submitted by RHONYC on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:03pm.

Die Hart.

WTFOMGLOL's picture
Submitted by WTFOMGLOL on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:02pm.

I think this heart is broken. There's a chink in it.

WTFOMGLOL's picture
Submitted by WTFOMGLOL on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:01pm.

Happy Varentine's Day !

Chris Knight's picture
Submitted by Chris Knight on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:01pm.

WHATS LOVE BUT A SECOND HAND EMOTION....

RHONYC's picture
Submitted by RHONYC on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:00pm.

i got more heart than all you punks...come get some!

Submitted by tiffmull on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:00pm.

Ooohhh... so THIS is where broken hearts go.

RHONYC's picture
Submitted by RHONYC on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:56pm.

that bitch sure left Rob's heart down in the dumps.

Chris Knight's picture
Submitted by Chris Knight on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:55pm.

THE HEART OF ROCK'N'ROLL....

Submitted by khazar-khum on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:54pm.

Love is a battlefield.

Chris Knight's picture
Submitted by Chris Knight on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:52pm.

LOVE OLYMPICS LOSER....

OurMissC's picture
Submitted by OurMissC on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:52pm.

Patti Stanger promised to fix me up with a guy with a whole lotta heart.

Submitted by HamilcarRules on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:52pm.

Huh. Turns out all the wrong places was the right place to look.

RHONYC's picture
Submitted by RHONYC on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:51pm.

Rob Pattinson's heart is waiting to jump Rupert Sanders with some
back-alley street justice!

Chris Knight's picture
Submitted by Chris Knight on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:51pm.

I HEART JACKIE CHAN....

Submitted by Mr. Bitter on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 8:07pm.

"I asked to see you with a hard on, not with your heart on."

Submitted by Bambi-in-the-he... on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:50pm.

After Joseph Jackson showed too much heart the Jackson family kidnaped him in a black van and left him in the back alley of 24 hour Michael Jackson tribute karaoke bar.

Submitted by tarc817 on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:48pm.

This just gave me a heart on.

FluffKitteh's picture
Submitted by FluffKitteh on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:48pm.

Dick Cheney's heart finally quits that bitch for a better life in the ghetto.

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"Brows should not look like a condiment!" -MK

liverwurst's picture
Submitted by liverwurst on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:42pm.

The sad, broken heart of Robert Pattinson takes one last look before hopping in the moving van.

privateyz's picture
Submitted by privateyz on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:40pm.

Not exactly what John Mayer meant when he called up love-struck Katy Perry and said “tonight I’ll meet you in the back alley”.

RHONYC's picture
Submitted by RHONYC on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:39pm.

this fruit of the loom commercial shoot was a bust.

Submitted by Rose on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:39pm.

Looks like you DIDN'T leave your heart in San Francisco.

Submitted by pipflip on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:38pm.

I yo mova! Wat Yu Want faw $15 an awa!

RHONYC's picture
Submitted by RHONYC on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:38pm.

owner of a lonely heart.

Rocket's picture
Submitted by Rocket on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:37pm.

Dick Cheney's transplanted heart thought his new digs would be better than this.

Strepsi's picture
Submitted by Strepsi on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:37pm.

A heart and a van in an alley? Wait, wait... I've figured the encrypted Blind Item out!!! "Kirstie ALLEY's GARBAGE-clogged HEART stopped yesterday after she was shown the fully uncoiled HOSE of James VAN der Beek."

RedPeggy's picture
Submitted by RedPeggy on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:37pm.

That girl from the Roger Sanchez video is still waiting for her boyfriend.

Submitted by Bambi-in-the-he... on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 3:07pm.

Toto, i dont think we are in Kansas anymore.

Submitted by pipflip on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:36pm.

I yo mova! What yu want for 15 dalla an owa!

OurMissC's picture
Submitted by OurMissC on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:31pm.

LOL Strepsi!

"I don't know her." - Mimi

Im the Mary's picture
Submitted by Im the Mary on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:31pm.

SumDum Heart Gai waits for his ride, Wun Hung Lo.

Strepsi's picture
Submitted by Strepsi on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:30pm.

Aorta Be In Pictures.

OurMissC's picture
Submitted by OurMissC on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:29pm.

He always did wear his sleeves on his heart.

Submitted by DiamondDogs on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:29pm.

It looks like having a big heart doesn't get you very far nowadays.

Submitted by MelissaMuse on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:28pm.

Hey Rob, I found it!

strawberry_feather's picture
Submitted by strawberry_feather on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:26pm.

After hearing about Chick-fil-a's anti-gay marriage views, Mah Boo Anderson decides to show them what real love looks like.

Submitted by MelissaMuse on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:26pm.

Although less stabbings occured in desolate alleys this year, Heart attacks definately increased.

ImpertinentVixen's picture
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:24pm.

Courtney Love's vagina out on the ho stroll.

·...¸><((((º>·´¯`·. ¸.><((((º> .·´¯`·..·><((((º>
Visit The Freckle on Lindsay Lohan's Lip on Facebook.

Submitted by Glen on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:24pm.

When they asked Roger what the crappiest acting job he ever had was, he replied "One time I had to work on Glee...."

Submitted by Glen on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:22pm.

Fucking Grindr, it said giant HARD ON near...

Emeriesan's picture
Submitted by Emeriesan on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:22pm.

Why pay for dating websites when love is just round the corner?

ImpertinentVixen's picture
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:22pm.

It's heart out there for a pimp.

·...¸><((((º>·´¯`·. ¸.><((((º> .·´¯`·..·><((((º>
Visit The Freckle on Lindsay Lohan's Lip on Facebook.

ChubbyWubby's picture
Submitted by ChubbyWubby on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:22pm.

Cupid got car jacked!

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"Money is the magic wand that turns a frog into a prince" - ChubbyWubby
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ChubbyWubby's picture
Submitted by ChubbyWubby on Thu, 08/02/2012 - 2:21pm.

"She tore my heart out and now he lives in a van down by the river!"

================================================
"Money is the magic wand that turns a frog into a prince" - ChubbyWubby
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