Meanwhile, In St. Tropez....
London might have the flaming Olympic cauldron, but right now St. Tropez has something even better: the twin flaming albino torches of ridiculousness known as Jedward. Dozens of hos in St. Tropez were temporarily blinded by flying gel crust and star dust when Jedward sashayed on by with America's reigning gutter goddess Tara Reid. If the Mad Hatter served crack cakes and meth tea to Alice and Tweedledee and Tweedledum at his party, this is what the aftermath would look like.
The broken condom babies of Christopher "Kid" Reid and Robert Pattinson became friends with Tara Reid when they all did Celebrity (????) Big Brother. Yes, they are just PLATONIC friends and you can't tell me otherwise. I refuse to believe that Jedward ran their tongues over Tara Reid's deflated whoopee cushion stomach at the same time, because if that happened the universe would've barfed on this planet and drowned us all. A Jedward/Tara Reid sandwich is what you get when you order from the 9th Circle Deli deep within the colon of HELL!
And Jedward must be dumb as dick or brave as all shit if they're hanging around Tara Reid. I mean, they're white and powdery, and you know how Tara's nostrils get when she's around something that's white and powdery. The next time we see pictures of Tara, a red sneaker will be hanging out of her nostril. Tara's gonna snort them up.
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Twatty, you will need to place a disclaimer on all those things you imagine! TOO VIVID! TOO REAL, I can see them! Iow, those shorts could crawl away on their own, right? argh lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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TMuffin, seriously. She needs to wake up. Shocked she made it to this age. Pancreatitis, unbelievable.
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“When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to hear '27 months.' He's two. He's not a cheese. And I didn't really care in the first place.” -George Carlin (RIP MCA and C.Hitchens) *caprica six was/is here*
C6 -- she just had pancreatitis(sp?), which is some really serious stuff, nothing to play with. If she doesn't cool it, it can lead to some life-altering shit down the road.
Within -- hey, baby! Ugh, yeah, I know the descrip is pretty nauseating, but you know it's da truf! She probably scratches n' sniffs for fun while stoned.
Rough is the word I'm looking for. I too, thought she was looking great recently. So wrong...
Hi ((Twatty!))! Your description of her smelly shorts ugh! was too graphic - won't read back! lolol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Tara's losing her mind. Something's amiss, moreso than usual. Didn't she get out of some pancreatic shit recently?? You'd think the ho would just lay low and rest up for a few months. Christ.
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“When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to hear '27 months.' He's two. He's not a cheese. And I didn't really care in the first place.” -George Carlin (RIP MCA and C.Hitchens) *caprica six was/is here*
GG -- the crotch of her shorts is a virtual scratch n' sniff, LOL!!!
LaChaylo -- isn't her torso like really fucking long? It's really disgusting. Does she really think that's sexy? And she's been wearing that same bikini for months. And you KNOW she hasn't washed that freaking thing. There's a scrach n' sniff crotch on her bikini bottoms, too!!!
She doesn't look well. I don't wish it on her, but I would not be surprised if she didn't make it to 40.
Also, I absolutely CAN'T with Jedward (???) or whoever the fuck she's with.
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Douchechill!
Wow, they must have just seen her fully naked. Poor Tara - how can you not feel sorry for her?
She looks like the human version of a slightly overstuffed Virginia Slims after a few puffs.
Tara Reid went into complete reversal. I thought she actually was looking pretty good a couple of months ago.
C6, noooooo!!!! *closes eyes*
She has NO CURVES on that long planky, bloated, and oddly dimpled torso!!!
Submitted by LaChaylo on Sat, 07/28/2012 - 9:32pm.
I can't with Tara's wonky torso
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Chay, YES YOU CAN; FACE YOUR FEARS *carries poppy flower to Nepal mountain-top and builds strength to fight for what is right
*still voms at the wonk torso; why the bitch insists on showing it is beyond logic
ETa- what is that dumb jacket thing Tara's wearing? No.
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“When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to hear '27 months.' He's two. He's not a cheese. And I didn't really care in the first place.” -George Carlin (RIP MCA and C.Hitchens) *caprica six was/is here*
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Sat, 07/28/2012 - 10:24pm.
She looks like she smells really bad. And I bet when those cut-offs smell really bad in the crotch, she sniffs them to see how bad they smell, and then sprays some stinky cologne on the crotchal area to cover the heinous scent, only adding to the problem.
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:( The world is no longer a bright sunny place!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
She sells snatch crabs by the sea shore in St Tropez
~*~A Pirates Life For Me~*~
She looks like she smells really bad. And I bet when those cut-offs smell really bad in the crotch, she sniffs them to see how bad they smell, and then sprays some stinky cologne on the crotchal area to cover the heinous scent, only adding to the problem. Considering she's a blonde with big boobs, she really has the most shapeless body ever; she's most unappetizing.
She just emanates this Winehouse, Anna Nicole, Carpenter vibe....
b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b
"I'm doin hoe activities, with hoe tendencies. Hoes are my friends, hoes are my enemies."
Oh great Jesus, never ever let those twits jedward into the US entertainment industry...we've been hit over the head enough with Bieber!
Look away Chay! Look away!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
i don't care about this chicken leg whore,
I can't with Tara's wonky torso. It freaks me out.
High tide low tide? Who can tell the difference, it all smells the same when Tara's around.
singing....Trust the Gordon's fishermen
~*~A Pirates Life For Me~*~
It's so odd that she insists on showcasing that stomach ALL the time, yet it's hideous.
Jedward aren't awkward but cute-in-their-own-way - for some ungodly reason Irish tweens and elementary school kids like them and go to concerts and mall openings to see them etc and they either don't show up or lipsinc for 25 minutes and leave, after a hefty paycheck. They don't stay for their young fans and are "cute" in interviews but total assholes to their young fans.
They also think they are serious artists, despite the get ups. Look at them wandering around here, looking all serious, while simultaenously (sp) looking like two fucking idiotic clown rejects from Barnums. They really need to die a death, asap.
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Sat, 07/28/2012 - 9:04pm.
"That stomach is fucking hideous . Did she order the winehouse special from her surgeon or is that liquor bloat?"
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I read some time ago that her weird stomach situation was from some botched tuck/lipo that she had and then had to have corrected. The bloat for sure looks like alchy bloat (I have a number of them in my family).
As for her extended stay in the South of France...isn't she one of those rent-a-ho yacht girls?
/shudder
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"Though this be madness, yet there is method in it." - Hamlet, Shakespeare
No biggie, I've seen girls who come down here for spring break looking worse than Terror Reid.
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"Sal, darling, you are the reason some women go gay. ♥" - Submitted by Dog on Fri, 07/09/2010 - 6:32pm.
That hot-looking distended stomach is often seen in liver disease. Wasn't she just hospitalized for pancreatitis or something? Hmmm, the mind reels...
That stomach is fucking hideous . Did she order the winehouse special from her surgeon or is that liquor bloat?
She's still pretty but her abdomen...i dunno, someone should be sued for doing a shitty job.
'We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.'
Submitted by Stoney on Sat, 07/28/2012 - 8:28pm.
She looks rough. Gonna party herself into an early grave. Death watch!
Yeah. Her body is in horrible shape for her age.
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She looks rough. Gonna party herself into an early grave. Death watch!
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by lislop on Sat, 07/28/2012 - 8:10pm.
Undercooked chicken? Hahahaha. She's still pretty, so there's hope if she can get it together. That distended abdomen is so gross.
I think that's her liver crying for more cowbell.
....the hell?
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It's PHELPS time!
<"If the Mad Hatter served crack cakes and meth tea to Alice and Tweedledee and Tweedledum at his party, this is what the aftermath would look like.">
Nicely put. If they were walking down the Strip in Vegas this trio would probably be attracting a mob rather than a bunch of annoyed looks.
Undercooked chicken? Hahahaha. She's still pretty, so there's hope if she can get it together. That distended abdomen is so gross.
I'm guessing booze gas is responsible for that nasty distended stomach. How can she afford to party in St Tropez all summer?
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I could eat a knob at night - Karl Pilkington
Seriously, Tara has to be hookin over there for the cost of motel room cuz there's no way her long out of work ass could afford to be there and all she's doing over there is hanging out killing herself slowly with blow and alcohol. Sad.
Johnny Bravo lives and has a twin.
8th picture, Caption Contest:
"How much, you ask? $20 for a handy. $40 for a beej. And $100 to run your hands all over my deflated whoopie cushion (TM-MK) all night long."
EDITED: I just read the comments, and Gardening Girl had almost the exact same reaction I did to thumbnail 8! OMG. Seriously, that must be what's really going on in this photo.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Sat, 07/28/2012 - 6:14pm.
THUMB 8
Tara: $5 for a handjob, $25 for a blowjob, fiddy to get busy and a c-note if you want anal.
Jedward came in 19th in Eurovison. They are stars!
There's method to her madness. Walking around with those two frights draws the eyes away from cadaverish body. The term 'skinny fat' was coined for Tara.
Tara: stop drinking luv.
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Nothing like showing off skin the colour of undercooked chicken. GORGEOUS.
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Shiitake happens...
Tara Reid is 50 shades of rough and, as others have pointed out, has a swollen pickled look to the gut. Winehouse had the same look.
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"You wait. They gonna get everybody on twitter, facebook, doing everythin' online and then they gonna pull the PLUG and we all gonna be FUCKED!"
yeah, I swear I can see her poor pickled liver trying to get out of that disformed belly of hers...
Submitted by beb on Sat, 07/28/2012 - 6:41pm.
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Thanks bebeh! Ridonculous!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Bite your tongue MK! As long as LiLo is alive she's America's reigning gutter goddess!
How much do y'all think Tara's weekly rate is?
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Someone by the bar keeps looking at us dancing. I see him starring at me, I see what he wants be
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>:- (
Mr. Mercury ♥
WR - they are twins from Ireland that were on X Factor. Think they had a few hits in the UK, but not sure about success elsewhere (none in the US).
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"Taylor has an unfair advantage. Bitch never has to buy lube since her eyes are greasier than the peen of the lone top at a gay orgy." - MK
What is a Jedward? ugh to everything I'm seeing here, including the perv Tara is trying to ignore...
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Has Tara just moved there? It seems like they certainly appreciate her more than Americans do.....
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Now when you look at me, you're condemned to see
The monster your mother made you to be
And there ya got me, that's how you got free, you got rid of me
Frick and Frack aka Thing one and Thing two need to go the way of the dodo.
And, the hair they are fatally sporting is fucking retarded.
Please.
PLEASE.
I will pay someone to run over those douchebags with a big, gas guzzling SUV.
Need I say more?
FUCK.
This is your brain...
This is your brain on...oh what's this? Miracle grow?
Is Tara one of those prostitute mostly out of work actresses that sail around on yachts getting paid to whore it up and do drugs on those blind items from CDAN? Just a hunch...
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Sat, 07/28/2012 - 6:14pm.
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LMAO at you interpretation of each thumb GG, all completely plausible hahaha!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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