Katherine Jackson, Phone Home

July 22, 2012 / Posted by:

Something in the Jesus Juice ain’t clean. An unnamed nephew of Katherine Jackson filed a missing person report with the LAPD last night. I don’t know any of the facts or even what’s going on until I read the source but I automatically blame the husband. Joe Jackson looks like the most malicious, conniving, squatting toad ever, and the type of person who would buy a stolen baby on a soap opera and then sell it to the mother’s best friend. I watch the remnants of ABC Daytime. I know what goes on.

TMZ sez that Mrs. Jackson’s grandchillun have been unable to reach her for over a week. Paris Jackson has been Tweeting about how Gramma is evidently holed up with Carmen Sandiego at an undisclosed location somewhere and it’s scaring her people.


“yes, my grandmother is missing. i haven’t spoken with her in a week i want her home now.”

She followed that up with a plea for people to call the authorities if they see her, then added, “the same doctor that testified on behalf of dr murray saying my father was a drug addict (a lie) is caring for my grandmother… just saying.”

I’ll move past Paris stating MJ didn’t have a drug problem. Also note that Katherine’s legal eagle told CNN that she doesn’t go 24 hours without checking in on Paris, Quilt, and the rest.

This is all oddly timed. Some of the Jackson kids are currently trying to get the executors of MJ’s estate to step down citing mismanagement, and the kids are claiming that Katherine suffered a small stroke from all the stress. Jermaine Jackson was telling people earlier this week that she was resting in Arizona under doctor’s orders. So – a good portion of the family isn’t feeling that story? Jermajesty, come get your lyin’ ass daddy.

The cops are taking this seriously, too. They’re trying to reach the old gal, and are publicly urging her to get on the clamshell and let them know she’s not in a basement somewhere with someone putting a pen in her hand and puppeteering her signature on shit.

If there was ever a time for Detective LaToya Jackson to suit up and grab her magnifying glass, it’s now. Find Momma J, Toy Toy!

In other news, the Jackson kids must be relieved that their gross Dad was the one beating them. Because Katherine’s got HAND. Imagine that walloping your face?

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