Panty Creamer Of The Day: ScarJo's Bodyguard
To celebrate the fact that she's getting paid $19,999,999.50 too much to mumble out lines in the next Avengers movie, ScarJo rolled around on a yacht in Taormina, Italy today with a friend and her piping hot, panty pudding-churning bodyguard. I read a rumor last week, or so, that ScarJo auditioned to be Bradley Cooper's latest beard and that she's no longer getting on that Nate Naylor dude, but I don't know the exact goings-on of her punane. Whatever her situation currently is, she should still pull some The Bodyguard shit and get on the piece that's protecting her multi-million dollar chichis. That dude is like the epitome of the late 80s and ScarJo needs to take her coochie time traveling.
Dude is like late 80s Charlie Sheen meets Jose Canseco's hair part meets Baywatch Nights-era The Hoff meets the sunglasses section of a Florida gas station circa 1989. I bet he always smells like Hawaiian Tropic dark tanning oil, drives an '87 yellow Camaro, has a bathroom cabinet stocked with Nair, calls everyone "boss" and sleeps on a waterbed covered with a black panther comforter. Don't even get me started about how hot he looks when he makes a call on his brick cell phone. Swoon. And swoon.
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Submitted by spider3tattoo on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 10:10pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 10:06pm.
Boy if I had a dollar for every time I heard that one,
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Geeeez here I thought I was being all original like.
Getting to the important things I'm on my BB bit it seems the girls in the red has a really nice bum, so does scarjo from the looks of things. I like scarjo when she has an extra pound or two, someone said she has a pig face but I think she's pretty enough, I like her lips, they look very kissable:P
He's bringing the Scott Brown Playgirl-era hotness.
Submitted by Honey_Badger on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 10:09pm.
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:)
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 10:06pm.
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"nice perv" lol :P OK cheque's in the mail...let's see what you got baby! Yeeehaaaw!
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Boy if I had a dollar for every time I heard that one, I could buy AJ and her army an island and send her away for good! ;-)
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 10:03pm.
Whamo -- uh, unless you are Jon Hamm's twin, you are not getting pictures of the girls.
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Well someone did say "are you Mad Man!!!" The other day, does that count? :)
@ Whamo,
I'm going to have to copy and paste your last line into my sig. Wise words, my friend. lol
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"If music be the food of love, play on." ~ William Shakespeare
Or the artist formerly known as SalmaNella
cd
Submitted by spider3tattoo on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 9:59pm.
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Whamo, restoring our faith that all the nice pervs aren't gone yet! ;-) Mine'll cost ya tho:P
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"nice perv" lol :P OK cheque's in the mail...let's see what you got baby! Yeeehaaaw!
Yuck, that bodyguard looks like a creepy 70's pornstar. With all that money she can't get a hot young stud to guard her like Sharon Stone requires.
Then again, maybe she using that bodyguard to attract Tom Cruise since she's looking for a beard position.
That was the best description ever....occasionally I miss the late 80's/early 90's.
Whamo -- uh, unless you are Jon Hamm's twin, you are not getting pictures of the girls.
ubmitted by Honey_Badger on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 9:50pm.
@ Evil, Mefun and Whamo:
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All you can do is say you piece and call them on it if you feel so inclined or if it gets too much just step out for an hour or so or until the thread feels like it's back to fun. I was a hair away a few weeks ago from going off the rails and Reason talked my off the ledge and I appreciated it, 10min later my "seeing red" cooled off :) sometimes you need to take a deep breath and say fuck it! Lol!
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 9:52pm.
"Indeed eh guys! I think the best way to resolve this is if all you ladies send me pictures of your boobs, that would.. You know be a start to help "straighten" things out:) :P!!!"
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Aww Whamo, restoring our faith that all the nice pervs aren't gone yet! ;-) Mine'll cost ya tho:P
He has the look of a man that lucked into Scarlet's vagina during a moment of weakness and is now looking for a repeat or three-peat with her buddy joining in. He must have done alright because she's letting him lounge with her, but her body language is saying that he's a temp.
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Taking crazy things seriously is a serious waste of time."
— Haruki Murakami
"Jose Canseco's hair part"
*dies laughing*
Submitted by skinny fat on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 9:30pm.
ScarJo is getting $20 million for repeating being mediocre in The Avengers. On a happier note, that's $1 million more than St. Angie Ho got for that narcissitic crapfest The Tourist. But let's not get ahead of ourselves, Julia Roberts is the original $20 million per picture star and no one has replaced her yet.
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lol...The Tourist...can you believe that cheesy POS film was nominated for an Oscar?
The Avengers was good overall, but Scarjo added nothing to that film. There are plenty of actresses who could've made a sexier and more kick-ass Black Widow. Her hair looked like it had too much hairspray in it and that bothered me the entire movie.
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It's PHELPS time!
Submitted by mefunigirl on Mon, 07/09/2012 -
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Mon, 07/09/2012 -
Whamo -- some weird shit has been happening; I wonder if it's the heat or the full moons.
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Indeed eh guys! I think the best way to resolve this is if all you ladies send me pictures of your boobs, that would.. You know be a start to help "straighten" things out:) :P!!!
Orangina - Indeed they are just that. Prime example just look at Kate Goselin and Steve Neild. Yeah right body guard sure more like booby-guard.
" Oh my heavens , my photo has vanished ! "
@ Evil, Mefun and Whamo:
I agree to some level what you all are saying. However, at what point do you just sit back and be passive when someone is being a bigot or a homophobe? It is one thing to snark and jest but when it turns that ugly it gets under the skin. I have a choice to either sit back and take it all in or I can walk away. Right?
I certainly don't wish MK to start banning people left and right but when it gets that nasty it kind makes a humorous site into a forum for the depraved.
Anyway, I'll shut up about this now and return to regular snarkin'
BTW, I'd much rather be spending my time lusting over Mr. Bodyguard or dreaming of lying around on a yacht in Southern Italy
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"If music be the food of love, play on." ~ William Shakespeare
Or the artist formerly known as SalmaNella
Honey_Badger -- I know what you mean about getting so pissed off at someone. It happened the other day, but then doncorleone and Bigbendy came to my defense and smoothed things over for me. Thanks for letting me know about Within, too.
Louise -- when I think about things I'd people for, I always think, would I trade my face for theirs, and when I think about it, it always comes down to no; I like my face.
TellysWorld -- I agree with you about wanting to punch ScarJo; something about her ugly face makes me want to punch it the fuck in. And what's up with those squatty legs of hers? Only in the US could such an ugly, untalented twat become a movie star.
Why don't they just get it out of the way and admit that bodyguards are male prostitutes. Rent-a-pieces. Kept men, hired to protect your pussy from cobwebs and go everywhere with you, because you're needy and you need a beefcake around to validate you.
I agree TellysWorld, I like women to be thicker rather than rails, but somehow because of her cheeks, there is TOO much "roundness" to her, if that makes any sense.
it's like a bunch of circles.
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
OH my That man made me fret...
ubmitted by Honey_Badger on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 9:19pm.
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Don't ever delete you account Honey B! The fact of the matter is it doesn't matter where you are on line there will always be someone being an assholes. You don't want to lose people that really are friends because of one or two people that push your buttons. Just keep in mind it's their problem not yours:)
I hate ScarJo's cheeks. Hate hate hate hate hate them. Add in the nose and I want to punch her face flatter every time I see her.
Mindy Kaling's impression of ScarJo @1:40
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qcOdNc_seyM
Give me back my goddamn HELMET!
Child, that man would make me release the Kraken.
ScarJo is getting $20 million for repeating being mediocre in The Avengers. On a happier note, that's $1 million more than St. Angie Ho got for that narcissitic crapfest The Tourist. But let's not get ahead of ourselves, Julia Roberts is the original $20 million per picture star and no one has replaced her yet.
No way is he her body guard. He's a bit, physically, like Nate Naylor. She'll pump & dump.
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
I guess that "bodyguard" is the new code word for escort.
Her acting isn't the best, but, she is pretty to look at.
ubmitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 9:09pm.
Whamo I was wondering where you were earlier; and since Within... has mysteriously disappeared too I thought you two had run off together.
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Lol, I had a bit of a busy day today, Your right we haven't seen Reason for a bit have we!? I hope she's ok!! No there are only two girls I can run off with so she must have bailed with someone else :). I'm a little worried now that you've brought it up...Reason if you're out there give us a hello so we know you haven't been kidnapped by the LOON secret service.
Twat- She had a weirdly long torso and Katie Holmes like legs, but seemed pretty tall for a woman, at least 5'8-9". So it made her look really disproportionate. I try to not snark on other women's bodies, but she was giving my imaginary boyfriend a public handy!
But I will say that I would GLADLY give up my ass for a stomach as flat as hers, though.
Submitted by Honey_Badger on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 9:19pm.
Don't you delete your account here!!!! There have been a few that have done that and it made me sad to see them go and I didn't talk to them outside of the D and wished I had to be in touch with them. :(
Submitted by Honey_Badger on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 8:47pm.
Like I said earlier, I think this heat has some people really irritable, nothing you said or for that matter nothing anyone posts here would warrant that kind of response really.
it's a gossip blog, an anonymous one at that, and people can and will say anything, don't let it bother you.
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
Lucy and Twattie:
I remember Within saying she was going on vacation to Amsterdam in July. I miss her too. She always brightens the place up.
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"If music be the food of love, play on." ~ William Shakespeare
Or the artist formerly known as SalmaNella
Thanks ((((Whamo)))))
I tend not to engage in dialogue with commenters who are hate-filled. It is a losing battle. However, I literally got sick to my stomach today after reading what P. posted. Then when the tables were turned on me about my profile, well, I was a few seconds away from permanently deleting my account on here. However, several people on here helped me walk me away from the ledge. Most notable, Gardening Girl.
It made me appreciate this community even more.
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"If music be the food of love, play on." ~ William Shakespeare
Or the artist formerly known as SalmaNella
Ugh!
So don't get the appeal. He's fugly and she's boring.
Oh wait, they may be perfect for each other.
Louise -- Susy No Ass -- too funny! That chick had a weird body, didn't she? Weird, flat ass, short legs?
Lucifer_Sam -- what did happen to Within? I miss her & have been looking for her the past couple of days.
Whamo -- some weird shit has been happening; I wonder if it's the heat or the full moons.
Jefferson Darcy!
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 9:09pm.
Whamo I was wondering where you were earlier; and since Within... has mysteriously disappeared too I thought you two had run off together.
He was fapping to Aubry O'Day and her faux lez b friend.
If I needed bodyguards, I would go for those Mosad agents Michael Jackson used. They seemed to do the trick.
My vision of world peace: a chicken in every pot, and pot for all us chickens...and weasels.
After Sean Penn and Nate Naylor, she's no longer interesting. She ain't a very good actor.
I prefer Ginger Spice's Gentle Giant trainer. Anyone remember him?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What the fuck dude? And being European is NOT an excuse. - IHateCharityChic 05/10/2012
He looks like all my brother's douche bag friends from 1983-1992. Her friend looks like Susy No Ass The Hand Job Queen, Adrien Brody's new girlfriend.
I know ScarJo doesn't get a lot of love from the D and she's a crappy actress, but she's my girl crush.
I wish I had a yacht.
She doesn't look interested in anything he's saying though! Is she playing hard to get?
He looks like that guy that played Mike Brady in the Brady Bunch movies. Haha
I don't necessarily have anything against her. She's hot but a boring actress.
www.poopreport.com :)
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RIMADYL KILLS
Love MK's hilarious cultural placement of this guy's look.
Agree with others, too much moob for me. Well, too much XY chromosome also :)
Yeah there was sure some fugly, pointless (it always is) barfing and shitting all over some threads today. Makes me appreciate how nice this place and you regular decent dpals generally is/are.
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"End well: this isn't going to." - MK
Whamo I was wondering where you were earlier; and since Within... has mysteriously disappeared too I thought you two had run off together.
Submitted by Honey_Badger on Mon, 07/09/2012 - 8:47pm.
Thanks Spider. I don't know what happened today either. I just have to learn to not let the few rotten apples spoil the D for me.
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It's been a couple of weird days, I poked my head in a few times over the weekend and was reading some of the crap and just bailed out. Not sure what was going on with your tormentor either but I think I've seen him pull shit like that in the past. Like you Honey B if there is anything here that makes me lose my civility its racist comments. I will call that shit out in a heartbeat. The one other thing that pisses me off is our "oppression specialist" I don't like being swept up in a target group for someone that appears to have some real hate issues.
It easy to say don't let it bug you but...don't let it bug you. You can be sure you'll always have a friend that's got your back here, you've got a good kind heart and we all know that ok:)
He could guard my body all day and all night! That chest!
sunglasses section of a Florida gas station circa 1989. I bet he always smells like Hawaiian Tropic dark tanning oil, drives an '87 yellow Camaro, has a bathroom cabinet stocked with Nair, calls everyone "boss" and sleeps on a waterbed
hahaha.. I have seen those sunglasses at my local gas station with the key chains ..gift cards.. lighters and any other last minute Christmas gifts you forgot to pick up..you to funny