James Deen Wants You To Know That He's Not Sexing On Lindsay Lohan
Here's porn star James Deen and future porn star Lindsay Lohan leaving a Fourth of July party in Santa Monica last night, and no, he didn't drive her to Chateau Marmont where he bravely entered her crotch cavern of destruction with a crucifix in one hand and a vat of liquefied Valtrex in the other. That's what James Deen claims anyway. During an interview with Animal NY, James said that he's keeping shit strictly professional with HoHan and he's simply just getting to know her before they shoot that low-budget, soft-core Bret Easton Ellis mess The Canyons. The Health Department doesn't have to stick a Notice of Closure on James' crotch for violating health code 5473 (aka doing Lindsay Lohan), because even though he's dicked hundreds of tricks, LiLo isn't one of them.
“I can definitely honestly say Lindsay Lohan and I are not having sex!”
Wouldn’t he tell me? “I think I would tell everybody.”
“I don’t know anything about her except for that she’s a really nice, down-to-earth, normal twenty-five-year-old girl. We went to a business dinner and she was very professional. She drank coffee and water. Then she had to call for a car because she couldn’t walk ten feet from the door because of the paparazzi.” Deen seems a little riled up, protective.
Translation: "EVEN I HAVE STANDARDS!"
You know, I totally believe James. James has an illustrious career in fuck films and why would he mess that up by dipping into LiLo's Mordor cooch for a second or two? Does James really want the CDC to wrap a quarantine tent around him and keep him away from society until his tainted peen finally falls off? And if that didn't happen, James' 9-inch peen, which weighs more than him, would swear off all genitals and drag it him to the nearest monastery where it'd keep him up at night by muttering about freckled blue waffles.
And on a positive note, I give LiLo extra points for her A+ Mommie Dearest eyebrow game.
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omg picture seven - fright night!!
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"It's called a party bus! Not a punch-a-titty bus. And put your MetroCard away, Chris Brown, no such bus exists." MK
wtf thumb #7!!!!!!
second row from bottom, left picture totally needs a "Why So Serious?" caption.
http://popslave.tumblr.com/
She makes me hate those Miu Miu heels.
Submitted by NeverEclipsed on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 4:20pm.
I hope they are paying her well to star in a movie with a porn star because honestly that is a downgrade even for Lindsay Lohan.
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no it isn't.
I honestly think this is the worst she's ever looked, including that court appearance with the coal-brushed cheeks.
No lie, the Russian piece that I became head over heels d*ckmatized with a few years ago looks exactly like this dude ( but hotter). Not a fan of James Deen, I honestly don't know what the hullabaloo is over him. His movies are average and a little too aggressive for my taste. Anyone heard of Jean Val Jean? Now that was a male adult star who knew what he was doing.
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
That makeup job is down right hideous. I honestly don't think she cares to be anything but talked about- she doesn't have the inkling to tone down, get a good PR team and do what it takes to not have her reputation proceed her. I think she knows deep down she's limited on talent and that 100 other girls have taken her place since she started her downward spiral. She enjoys just being famous, not productive.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
They both look as high as kites to me.
Scousebrow on Hohan.
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Fair is foul and foul is fair..
I hope they are paying her well to star in a movie with a porn star because honestly that is a downgrade even for Lindsay Lohan. Not helping her comeback.
WHOA!! Peter North did gay porn (not that there's anything wrong with that)? lol at fuckin CHICKENHAWK!
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"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:51pm.
ba-buttons, isn't it the other way around? I thought a lot of porn stars that do gay porn are straight because there is so much more money in it.... idk, I'm sure it goes both ways (HEEEEEY!).
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lol, you're right, at least it was back in the day. Truthfully, much of the stigma in performing gay porn is gone, esp. within the industry itself. Subsequently, gay porn still pays a bit better than straight porn for male porn stars but not much.
With the stigma gone, competition for work in the gay porn field has become fierce. James used to do 'chickenhawk' porn - older men with young, boyish men - usually skinny but with big dicks (just like James). But you have to be super, super young looking to be the 'chicken', James was getting a little long in the tooth to be a 'chicken' and didn't have the build for more mmainstream porn so he went 'straight-for-pay'
Sorry ladies, almost all of the better known male porn stars are gay or have done extensive gay porn. Rocco Siffredi, Julian, Peter North.
But not Ron Jeremy. Sorry Sucky.
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Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Thu, 01/19/2012 - 11:56am.
Liver spotted hand
Groping while I cry inside
Merit badge and meth
Is it hot in here?
http://observer.com/2012/03/the-boyfriend-experience-bret-easton-ellis-p...
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:54pm.
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:52pm.
Gahhhh! We all thought the red hair would improve her looks -- it really didn't. She's busted beyond repair.
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She really is... and my daughter did a better job on makeup when she was 3 and got in to my wife's lipstick and shit... The makeup really makes her look filthy.
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WORD. She must have applied it herself. If not, some makeup artist really hates her azz.
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Douchechill!
Submitted by Bigbendy on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:30pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:23pm.
Now that picture is sticking with me for the rest of the day.......your creative writing is on point. Haha
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LOL :)
Submitted by Capitanne on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:49pm.
She's 26? For reals?
they left off the 1 in front of 26. Zombie Ginge Fire Crotch is 126 years old.
LOOK AT THESE:
The only time she's looked clean was this Vanity Fair spread where they made her look like Grace Kelly. Bunch of geniuses, that crew.
http://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/features/2010/10/lindsay-lohan-issue...
I've always said she is a terrific model. Not that she would have been better off, but even total crackheads like Kate Moss can behave for a well-paying shoot. Expecting her to behave for 3 weeks straight was like pulling teefs.
Why is she so bloated?
"Down-to-Earth" has gotta be one of my least favorite phrases.
Run porny guy, run!
oh yes....SO down to earth. the earthiest.
Her hair color does look better, but she's still stuck with the face.
Damn, she looks ok for 45.
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:52pm.
Gahhhh! We all thought the red hair would improve her looks -- it really didn't. She's busted beyond repair.
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She really is... and my daughter did a better job on makeup when she was 3 and got in to my wife's lipstick and shit... The makeup really makes her look filthy.
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"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
Gahhhh! We all thought the red hair would improve her looks -- it really didn't. She's busted beyond repair.
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Douchechill!
My grandma what big jowls you have!
When a porn star won't admit to fucking it, you are officially scum.
I think porn stars get tested all the time for STD's and shit... no way he wants to risk shakin his money maker anywhere near her infectious wasteland of a puss.
ba-buttons, isn't it the other way around? I thought a lot of porn stars that do gay porn are straight because there is so much more money in it.... idk, I'm sure it goes both ways (HEEEEEY!).
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"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
I guess Dina didn't get her vaccinated for mumps when she was a baby.
She's 26? For reals?
He didn't get down on it because he's a porn star! He only lays it out for $$.
And we all know Blohan is broke as a joke.
James, like many male porn stars in straight porn, is actually gay in real life.
Although I doubt that means much to Lindsay. Sex isn't about 'love' or 'fun' for her so the sex or sexuality of the partner is of little consequence. For Lindsay, sex is a tool to torture others. And herself.
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Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Thu, 01/19/2012 - 11:56am.
Liver spotted hand
Groping while I cry inside
Merit badge and meth
I know it's mean, but I can't stop laughing at her face in thumb #5. That's some Whatever Happened to Baby Jane shit.
Damn, thumb 1 - what bloat!
It's weird that her semi-permanent hair colour washed out at the ends but not at the roots. I thought it usually washes out the other way... however, that's presuming she's washed her hair since they dyed it.
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"You will drink the black sperm of my vengeance!" Beyond the Valley of the Dolls
Lord have mercy, who is her mortician?
We've seen so many of these photos of her where the paps seem to have leapt on the hood of the car.
here's how I read the post:
slorescabwhoreslorescabwhoreJAMES DEEN 9" PEEN. Link please. LOL
My vision of world peace: a chicken in every pot, and pot for all us chickens...and weasels.
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:24pm.
“I don’t know anything about her except for…"
"Because you've been cryogenically frozen and stored in a bunker for the last decade?"
LOL.
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Who are you calling silly cow?
She needs to use her Liz & Dick money--and her hoin' money too--to assemble a village of experts to help her acquire her old face, dignity and talent back. And maybe they can get her to read a book and get a hobby that doesn't include various illegal acts while they're at it. Hmmmm, lucky for her Jesus will consult for free, cuz she's gonna need Him.
#gonnatakeamiracle
He is fucking cute though. Wish he was into peen.
KIDS!!! DON'T DO DRUGS!!!!!!
This guy is only denying it cos he doesnt want his reputation to suffer. People might think he has no standards.
she’s a really nice, down-to-earth, normal twenty-five-year-old girl
He is an imbecile if he thinks that. Or he is an imbecile - period.
ubmitted by suckandfuck on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:31pm.
ahahahHAHAHAHAa freakin die!!!
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LMMFAOOOOOO
btw - I almost did... thank shit I had a mini snickers in my pocket to toss across the room and make a fucking break for it.
OT - she's one of those chicks you'd fuck just for name recognition.
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"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
This guy is not cool/hot enough for the name he chose.
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"If French is the language of love, then Spanish is the language of badassery!" -MK
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:29pm.
...Because I'm guessing that sounds better than "I fucked her in the ass with my foot long dick"
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
That sounds just like Sucky's daily lunch hour. Because unlike the rest of us, he isn't gay.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:28pm.
looks like I'm riding a wave of bisquik!
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ahahahHAHAHAHAa freakin die!!!
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
Submitted by louise_brooks on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:29pm.
This needs a "Your Face Scares Me" tag.
^^^^^^^^^^^^What she said...
50 Shades of FUCKTHAT
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"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:23pm.
Submitted by Bigbendy on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:20pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 07/05/2012 - 3:15pm.
_4041...
Whamo, haha. My kids get freaked out by the turkey gobbler necks on blue hairs.
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LOL!!! I still get freaked out by the super old lady mustache and the 12 course hairs that stick out indiscriminately from the face
*shudders*
Whamo, you are killing me. Now that picture is sticking with me for the rest of the day.......your creative writing is on point. Haha