So I Guess Tommy Girl And Stepford Katie Had One Of Those Short-Term Contracts
Katie Holmes and Suri are finally FREE AT LAST! This mess just in from People:
After five years of marriage, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are getting a divorce, PEOPLE has learned exclusively.
"This is a personal and private matter for Katie and her family," says Holmes's attorney Jonathan Wolfe. "Katie's primary concern remains, as it always has been, her daughter's best interest."
Every Scientologist just dropped the dick out of their mouth. Tommy Girl and Katie haven't been photographed together in what feels like eons, but I really thought they had at least 5 more years of fakery since nothing keeps a marriage going like a contract written in your own blood. NOTHING IS SACRED anymore, not even fake marriages. Brace yourselves, because we're going to be hearing about this for months or until Tommy eventually gets himself another beard wife. Then we'll do this all over again. My money's on Rooney Mara. She's young, and she looks like an alien AND a boy. Get that beard, Tommy!
Here's Katie looking like cold hell on the outside (but probably couch jumping on the inside) while leaving her NYC apartment with Suri the other day.
• 
I'd heard that Katie's Father has no intention of letting Suri and Katie get trampled the way Nicole did by the xenu machine. Run Katie Run!!!!! She deserves to be happy.
My issues now have issues.. So take a number.
http://ohnotheydidnt.livejournal.com/70047930.html
AND Adele is pregnant. what a day!
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Then we’ll grow up take our clothes off
And you’ll remind me that I wanted you to kiss me
When we find some time alone
And then we can do anything we want
You know a five year contract wasn't too bad. I wonder how much she's getting paid?
ok i have finally calmed down after my initial reaction.
tommy is a player yo, didnt u see the rock of ages, i didnt. but i read that the starting scene has tommy girl in bed with like 4 girls around him and he was like the channelling hugh hefner. the girl were naked with strategically placed sheets over their tit, and that was meant to sorta say, tommy girl had fucked with them, not give each other manis and pedis, and braided each other's hair before they had a pillow fight and played spin the bottle and tommy girl giggled cuz he had to kiss a gurrll
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Fri, 06/29/2012 - 2:02pm.
Have you seen her movies? She's not that good of an actress.
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
She probably thought the marriage would help her acting career and if anything, it made it tank even further. New strategy: watch her do a biopic where she has to ugly herself up so she can get an Oscar.
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Silly rabbit.
You know what's shocking SURI WALKING!!!
Coma Caca!
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there's chance we are going to see a smile back on katie's face soon which is good.
'We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.'
Aw, And we all thought it would last forever... pffft... bwahahaha!
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I AM on a drug. It's called Charlie Sheen. -- Carlos Estevez
Lucifer, I have seen many pics of Suri. I don't think she looks much like Tommy....
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Then we’ll grow up take our clothes off
And you’ll remind me that I wanted you to kiss me
When we find some time alone
And then we can do anything we want
To loosely quote Iago from Aladdin- I think I'm gonna die of a heart attack from not surprise.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
What would make this EPIC is if Tommy girl and the CO$ try to take Suri from her, ala Kidman. And she has DNA testing revealed the Tom is not Suri's biological father, therefore has no rights as a parent.
OMG! *rubs hands together*
This COULD get soooooooooooooooooooo juicy!
If Katie falls ill, has a mysterious accident...we ALL KNOW the CO$ is trying to off her.
submitted by Daniee on Fri, 06/29/2012 - 1:59pm.
Custody issues will rely a lot on whether he officially adopted the child or not, which I am sure he did. I know I am in the minority, but she was pregnant when she got with him so no way that kid is his.
lol please have a seat. Have you ever seen a picture of Suri?
we asked for some juicy gossip and we received.
If she's able to walk with Suri, she's got some strong shit on Tommy Girl and the Scientos. Maybe she's been fooling everyone with the "Katiebot" personna and has been gathering blackmail material all along. For her sake, I hope so.
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If it looks like a stunt, walks like a stunt and smells like warm piss on burnt plastic, it came directly from Pimp Mama Kris' pimpin' hand. - MK
I wonder who he will jump on a couch about next.
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Then we’ll grow up take our clothes off
And you’ll remind me that I wanted you to kiss me
When we find some time alone
And then we can do anything we want
"katie knows what happened"
oh how i wish she would talk and demand chris klein to take a paternity test....or even just talk about the longest pregnancy in the world including the basketballs used as the belly
♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫
Miss your fucked up ways on my fucked up days.
We were due for some bombshell celebrity divorce news. Let's be honest, a celebrity couple making it PAST ten years is cause for news, not the other way around.
Submitted by Zappy on Fri, 06/29/2012 - 2:00pm.
RUN KATIE RUN! Congrats Katie! We were always rooting for you!
*****
I wasn't.
I'm surprised that I am shocked but I am shocked!
Three failed marriages, Tom. What would Xenu do?
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Dark-sided!
Omg. I bet her nightmare is just beginning! The CO$ is not gonna just let her walk away with Suri. Get ready for some shocking stories of Katie's "lesbian romps", drinking/drugging, mental illness and child abuse. This is gonna get gross, fast!
PSL- I looked it up and they got married in November 2006, but claimed to be dating since April 2005.
Holy crap Batman, Mutt Lauer & Tommy all in the same week. So many abs, so little attraction.
And cue Blake Lively as NEW BEARD in 3, 2, 1.....
"vaya con huevos mi amigos"
RUN KATIE RUN! Congrats Katie! We were always rooting for you!
Submitted by ethang on Fri, 06/29/2012 - 1:58pm.
Now you know St. Angie's gonna have to do something drastic to compete with this story.
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My guess is she'll be pregnant with their umpteenth kid and they'll adopt another one.
Fuck it, I'll beard for him for 10 years as long as he doesn't want another child. Live in separate houses, never have sex, never see each other - but get my millions. I fail to see the problem here.
FINALLY!! Run Katie!!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I'M DONESVILLE!
Nourish the Inner Asshole
Borrachas of the world unite and take over!
Think of the mini robots!!!
Coma Caca!
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I wonder who gets Suri. Nicole was basically cut off from her kids with Tiny Tom.
Custody issues will rely a lot on whether he officially adopted the child or not, which I am sure he did. I know I am in the minority, but she was pregnant when she got with him so no way that kid is his. Still think it's Josh Hartnett's. Anyway, as has been said, things in Sciento are not the same as when Nicole escaped so I do feel she will get her kid out of it and see her more than a few times a month if they want to spend time with her and no pap photos EVER like Nicole.
Katie, you go girl!!!
Now you know St. Angie's gonna have to do something drastic to compete with this story.
supposedly 8 years was the contract.....has it been 8 years?
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Then we’ll grow up take our clothes off
And you’ll remind me that I wanted you to kiss me
When we find some time alone
And then we can do anything we want
Finally, some interesting celebrity gossip!!!!!!!!
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Douchechill!
She was looking unhappy/lost for a while there. Not sure if there was a contract or not, but I wish her, and Suri, the best.
Submitted by Daniee on Fri, 06/29/2012 - 1:52pm.
I wonder what 27 year old he is gonna try to hire next.
Amber Heard.
Submitted by Whamo on Fri, 06/29/2012 - 1:55pm.
Katie better not drive a car for a while I have a feeling there will be a sudden rash of brake failure on...well everything and anything she'll be driving.
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Whamster, that's exactly what I was thinking!
No. Fucking. Way.
Get out!!!!!
DAMN! I didn't think it was this soon. I was going to give until Suri was 10 years old.
Wow, I'm shocked. No seriously. I'm shocked. I didn't think it was this fast.
Specualtions, people!!! What do you think happened????
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Grow up, Demi, and do coke off toilet seats like the rest of us adults do!- Michael K, 1/26/12
Submitted by Haribo on Fri, 06/29/2012 - 1:53pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Fri, 06/29/2012 - 1:50pm.
Submitted by vsminimoose on Fri, 06/29/2012 - 1:47pm.
I will totally be one of the deadbeats that buys her tell-all if she has one.
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I would push an old lady in a wheelchair down a flight of stairs to read a tell all NO DOUBT!
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all the old ladies in wheelchairs brace yourselves!
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Oh yeah? Well I will invoke the wrath of Alec Baldwin and Russell Crowe combined so that I can be first in line.
Actually, this is something I'd preorder on the Kindle. lol.
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"You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."
- Yogi Berra
I just can't believe in love anymore. :(
Please tell me this is true and not MK messing wit us.
oh mah goodness. can't wait to see how tommy girl spins this one. nicole must be trying to laugh her frozen face off. katieBot, dear, you know your career is not going to skyrocket like Nicole's did post-Tommy Girl. Nicole had talent.
WOW. I am very surprised she is being allowed to do this...
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Fri, 06/29/2012 - 1:54pm.
MILLIONS ARE CRYING!
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Millions of Tommy's dollars anyway!
I am honestly shocked. Obviously, not shocked that they didn't make it for the long haul, but shocked that they're splitting so soon. I thought she was under contract for at least one more kid...
Please please PLEEEEEASE write a tell all, Katiebot!
Guess they finished contract termination talks. Xenutinis for everyone!
Katie better not drive a car for a while I have a feeling there will be a sudden rash of brake failure on...well everything and anything she'll be driving.
I wonder what the payout is!! I'm in shock right now, as someone said we knew it was coming but WOW.
TAKE SURI AND THE MONEY AND RUUUUUUNNNNN, GIRL!!!
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Time cast a spell on you but
You won't forget me
I know I could have loved you but
You would not let me
-Fleetwood Mac