Johnny Depp Wrecked Amber Heard’s Happy Lesbian Home, Maybe

For the past couple of months, there’s been rumors that Johnny Depp has been Edward Scissoring Amber Heard ever since VaJohnny broke up and there’s been more rumors that the two started getting horny for each other while shooting The Rum Diary two years ago. I didn’t really pay too much attention to those rumors, because why would hot piece Amber Heard ride on current day Johnny Depp when she can ride on her hot piece of a girlfriend instead? But now a source tells InTouch Weekly (via DM) that Amber and her girlfriend Tasya van Ree stopped bumping coochies a few months ago and they’re still friends.

The source tells InTouch that Amber and Tasya broke up around the same time she started rubbing nipples with Johnny. Who knows if it was a clean break up or if Amber and Johnny pulled an “Eddie & LeAnn” by leaving their pieces for each other. I don’t know, but I do know that Amber has a serious hat fetish. Hat-fucker!

And no, no, Johnny’s dick doesn’t have magical lezzie-rebuking powers. Amber has been open about loving herself some poon AND poon. Although, Johnny’s been looking like a middle-aged gypsy lesbian from New Mexico for a while, so maybe Amber thinks he’s a woman who always wears a really fancy, lifelike strap-on.

But more importantly, what is Amber and Johnny’s couple name. This is obviously the only thing any of us care about? What about BerJohnny? Or Hearpp? Yeah, let’s go with Hearpp. Hearpp has a certain special ring to it.