The Photoshop Awards: Jenny McCarthy's "Elegant" Playboy Cover
Here's Miss Tits Against Vaccines herself Jenny McCarthy celebrating her upcoming 40th birthday by posing naked on her sixth cover of Playboy. From those Girls Just Wanna Have Fun gloves to the fact that Playboy dulled every single Photoshop tool while making this cover, this shit is a mess. But a bigger mess is Jenny using the words "class" and "elegant" to describe her "Photoshopped into another face" spread. Jenny barfed up this pile of LOLs to People:
"I'm really proud of it. The pictures are really gorgeous and classy. They could be out of W magazine. They're really elegant. It's probably a lot more sophisticated than a lot of the stuff you'd see of people with their clothes on."
The words "Jenny McCarthy" and "elegant" go together like the words "Jenny McCarthy" and "sane." The only way Jenny's spread could be described as "sophisticated" is if they covered her Joker face and body with a pink velvet blanket and laid Shauna Sand on top of her. Also, please tell me while Jenny posed nekkid ass nekkid in an air-conditioned studio, karma twirled in and blew a case of whooping cough right at her.
And I bet the classiest picture in the spread is the one of Jenny McCarthy flashing the message "Jim Carrey Hates Kids (Even More Than I Do!)" shaved into her full pube bush. Yes, Jenny shaved all those words into her bush. She's got a really wide bush.
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I like to wear a bright red or fuschia lip on a special occasion. But if I'm going to do that, I keep the eye makeup very low key, otherwise it's this low dollar early 80s over the top look McCarthy's sportin'.
Twatty, A "five-headed, horse-faced slut"? - BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA AAAHHAHAHA FIVE-HEADED? lolololololol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Chirio -- OMG, totally agree about using accessories wrong, and especially wearing too many accessories at the same time. I'm more of a minimalist myself, a less is more type. Those mesh gloves are so damn tacky, especially when worn by an ugly whore who's wearing an inch of spackle on her mug.
Submitted by IrishFury on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:51pm
Submitted by WithinReason... on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:55pm
call me an old ass inappropriate red lipstick wearing ho' too. i own red in different shades and in every form of product.
/puts on red lipstick right now just because i can
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
IV, that was so classy....toilets are sexy.
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And now I'm hard, too hard to know
I don't cry when I'm sad anymore, no no
Tears calcify in my tummy, fears go inside
How can I ask anyone to love me
When all I do is beg to be left alone?
Whamo -- I had a feeling you weren't look at her face, LOL!
IrishFury -- I totally agree with you about the age limits thing. I'm in my 40's and I occassionally wear red lipstick and have long hair.
Argh I hate it when people can't use accessories right...isn't that right glove hole for her middle finger? pisses me off. Breathe Jenny...breathe! it's ok to breathe!
Coma Caca!
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MMM. No. Remember the old Candie's shoes ad with Jenny sitting on a toilet with her panties down, wearing Candie's shoes??? Yurk.
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Visit Anthony Higgins Performances on Facebook.
Somebody is still trying to get her ex's attention.
that is quite a shitty picture of her.
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And now I'm hard, too hard to know
I don't cry when I'm sad anymore, no no
Tears calcify in my tummy, fears go inside
How can I ask anyone to love me
When all I do is beg to be left alone?
Playboy? Really?
Submitted by IrishFury on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:51pm.
Submitted by SalmaNella on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 1:50pm.
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I'm with IF on this one Salmabella! Red lipstick can look hot on anyone you just need the right shade and then be sure to leave a print everywhere you kiss! <3
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by precociousmagpie
Eww! Her hair looks like it was styled by Callista Gingrich.
Hell, put Callista herself on the cover with a couple of Tiffany's bags. Young guys don't buy Playboy anymore. Aim for the golf cart/Rascal set.
Submitted by SalmaNella on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 1:50pm.
Secondly,
Bright red lipstick does not look becoming on women over 35.
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Not true.
I cannot stand this age cut off and age requirements society seems to have for women. No skirts over the knee past 30, no long hair after 40. no this, no that - nobody does that with men and it's women who set this stupid "rules". I'll wear red lipstick all I want and my toned body and good face will look FANFUCKINGTASTIC with it!
Uh, not picking on anyone but I see these "rules" everywhere and they are dumber than dumb.
Dr. Jenny McCarthy, M.D., Ph.D is an asshole.
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Dark-sided!
Lucy...LOL @ the top shelf!!!
America's Sweetheart, my ass.
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"... and her temper worse than wildfire it is gunpowder and blows up everything ..." Mary Shelley
Submitted by 18thCenturyFox on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:28pm.
Red lipstick is ageless, she is just ugly. If you haven't got the confidence to wear it, don't.
And if that looks plus sized to you, you're just blind- not a fatist.
My name is Emily. And I don't mince words.
Yes.
Mike, I like you, but there is nothing about her that looks "plus sized" here.
say something nice...ummm I like that metal floor mat background. Gives it Klass!
Coma Caca!
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Youzzahooooooo...
18thCenturyFox -- I totally agree. Putting red lipstick on her is like putting lipstick on a pig -- it's still a pig after all (and no offense to our porcine friends). She's got a fivehead and a huge chin. She's because she's blonde (and not even that is real) and blue-eyed doesn't mean she's pretty.
Within -- *waving back*
Athina -- I don't know why she acts like her kid is fatherless; he's a product of her marriage, he has a father. Go to his father if you feel he's not getting enough attention. Oh, wait, I forgot, your ex-husband isn't famous, that's why. That's why she's hanging Jim Carrey out to dry. Jim Carrey has no obligation to that kid and from what I understand was more than decent to her & the kid.
Submitted by SalmaNella on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:00pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 1:55pm.
I always went for the Penthouse. ;-)
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I like your style Nella:P lol!
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Submitted by Twat Muffin on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 1:56pm.
Whamo -- we need to find you a nice girl. She's nothing more than a five-headed, horse-faced slut; her chin needs its own zip code.
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LOL!!! I wasn't even really looking at her face, but that's a damn funny description just the same.
Debra Lefevre, is that you?
I'm sure this is doing WONDERS for her autistic, fatherless son.
LMAO @ Mickey!
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
They couldn't have fatted up her nose, too instead of keeping that bizarro, pinched looking Lady Elaine Fairchild number?
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
I didn't know y'all consider her your sweetheart! What else have you been hiding?
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Who are you calling silly cow?
Submitted by 18thCenturyFox on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:28pm.
Red lipstick is ageless, she is just ugly. If you haven't got the confidence to wear it, don't.
And if that looks plus sized to you, you're just blind- not a fatist.
My name is Emily. And I don't mince words.
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Hi Emily,
Red lipstick is aging!
p.s. I mince meat. :-)
You can take the girl out of the gutter but not...........................
She is awful. Saw her on tv a while ago talking about when she is walking down the street she has multiple random orgasims and how she is always horny. Based on that, this publication is a perfect fit.
Hi Twatty! Having fun with this cover full of elegant gorgeous classiness? ((waves))
*runs back to the executive viewing... er meeting room* ;D
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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this doesn't even look like her, the only think I find slightly bearable about her is she acts like a big goof ball, "serious and classy" (ha ha ) doesn't suit her at all
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
Submitted by mike on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:22pm.
They photoshopped her bod so much that she almost looks plus-sized.
My name is mike, and I'm a fatist.
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Makes two of us. I mentioned the same earlier.
Red lipstick is ageless, she is just ugly. If you haven't got the confidence to wear it, don't.
And if that looks plus sized to you, you're just blind- not a fatist.
My name is Emily. And I don't mince words.
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" I don't care what anybody says about me, as long as it isn't true."
Dorothy Parker
Within -- hiya, babe! *waving*
Submitted by Paquita on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:23pm.
The color on her arms is different, looks like she has a hairy arm.
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To go with her hairy pubes.
OK, Loopy, here are the keys to the excutive audition room/closet again! lol
OnT: Yes, a gorgeous, classy and elegant shaved possum! This one goes in Jim's basement! *muah*
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•ღ♩♦≈❀♠░░░░
The color on her arms is different, looks like she has a hairy arm.
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Don't blame me! I voted for Kodos!
http://lif3d3sign.tumblr.com/
Submitted by WithinReason... on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:18pm.
Loopy, better make that two copies you set aside! ahahahaha
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Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:06pm.
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ok two copies it is.
They photoshopped her bod so much that she almost looks plus-sized.
My name is mike, and I'm a fatist.
That horrible B movie, "Dirty Love", that she did with Carmen Electra is one if my guilty pleasures. That's all I got.
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
Submitted by FunFilled on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:12pm.
I loathe the word "classy."
Me too. If someone describes something as "classy", they are generally not "classy" themselves.
Loopy, better make that two copies you set aside! ahahahaha
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Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:06pm.
Submitted by loopygorilla on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:04pm.
matt boner needs to get his fine self on playgirl and go full commando, i would buy every copy on this planet!!!
Save one copy for me, boo!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•ღ♩♦≈❀♠░░░░
"Also, please tell me while Jenny posed nekkid ass nekkid in an air-conditioned studio, karma twirled in and blew a case of whooping cough right at her...."
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LMAO!
But hey... she will cure herself, with her own special conceived diet. Just like she cured her son of autism!
FunFilled -- isn't it ironic that the people who always use the word "classy" are the people who are anything but?
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:05pm.
Playboy is sold in a black plastic cover.
Don't ask me why I know this.
Really? Over here, everything just hangs out - but they put it on the top shelf so that the LITTLE people cannot reach it lmao!
i'd like to know the whereabouts of those 2012 best bars. i'd also like to be able to find that out without having to look at Jenny McCarthy
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
crazyinjapan -- ugh, that's what I hate about her the most, she's so crude & vulgar, very unladylike (yes, this is coming from someone who calls herself Twat). And always dragging her kid into it, that poor little boy.
Submitted by fleur_de_lis on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:08pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 06/25/2012 - 2:05pm.
Playboy is sold in a black plastic cover.
Don't ask me why I know this.
Oh, I live in Europe, where boobs are not considered hazardous to your children's health. America, you never seize to amaze me....
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Boobs = therapy if seen by children under 18.
*laughs*
I loathe the word "classy."
OT - after relentlessly calling my BH for the last hour and a half, because there is a major accident on the highway involving the kind of truck he drives, I finally got him to answer the fucking phone. He's fine. Now, as for me trying to get home this afternoon.......not going to be easy with 30,000 lbs of concrete spread across the highway.
Not hot!