Pimp Mama Kris Directed This Totally Authentic Moment, So Says Kris Humphries
Kris Humphries is currently trying to legally shut his ex-piece, Myla Sinanaj, up, because she's selling all the text messages he sent her about his fake marriage to Kim Kuntrashian. Myla claims that Kris told her she was the love of his life and he couldn't wait to get his divorce from Kim out of the way so they could be together. This screws with Kris' money, because he's suing Kim for playing with his innocent heart and defrauding him by only using him for a publicity stunt. (Nobody has ever accused Kris Humphries' caveman shit brain of producing anything but DUHs.)
Most of the shit Myla has been saying about Kris and Kim isn't that surprising, but nothing is more unsurprising than what he told her about Kim's sex tape with Ray J. TMZ says that Myla claims Kris told her that whore master Pimp Mama Kris ordered Kim to fuck her way to fame by making that tape with Ray J. The first cut wasn't good enough for Pimp Mama Kris so she ordered reshoots. Say what you want about Pimp Mama Kris, but she really does care about the cinematic integrity of her daughter's fuck time tape. TMZ's source puts it like this:
Kris Humphries trashed Kim Kardashian and her family in conversations and text messages to his former girlfriend, Myla Sinanaj ... telling her Kris Jenner not only directed Kim to shoot her sex tape, but to re-shoot because Kris J didn't think the first one was pretty enough.
A source close to the Kuntrashians (see: Pimp Mama Kris) calls this a lie, but I believe every word of it and no lies are detected. But what gets me is if they did reshoots, what did the first tape look like? I've seen more emotion in the faces of the plastic toys my dog humps than I did while watching Kim get her appendix poked out by Ray J's boomerang dick. Bitch just lays there like a constipated walrus trying to push out a much-needed fart. Maybe Kim was even deader in the first one and it classified as necrophilia porn, so PMK scrapped it. Actually, the second one counts as necrophilia porn too, because PMK sold Kim's soul to the devil long before that tape was made.
Here's PMK's #1 ho and her #2 ho Kanye Kardashian going to some restaurant in Paris yesterday.
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am i the only person in the world who hasn't seen this tape? i think i'm ready - somebody shoot me a good link and i will watch it, if just to see what a "boomerang dick" looks like....
EDIT: oh, fuck, never mind. Porn Hub saves the day, so to speak.
and i've seen dicks with more serious bendage than Ray J's, I thought we were getting into some real abnormal V is for Victory dick here.
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God don't like ugly.
Karl J. Anglin
If Robert Kardashian were still
alive, his daughter Kim would never
have done any of this Playboy magazine
sex tape stuff at all.
That picture almost made me vomit. I anxiously await the day when that stupid whore dies a slow, painful death.
Submitted by lovesmesomeblackdick on Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:02pm.
yes well he has a huge dick lol so practise your gag reflexes. :)
Gross....Beyonce does not approve.
No way they did reshoots on Kim K. Superstar, it couldn't possibly have been any worse. At one point one of her ass implants ripped free of its moorings when Ray J was hittin it from the back, and you could totally see the seam were implant met fat! It looked like he was sodomizing an ottoman!!
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
WR, ick nasty! *splashes holy water around thread*
Submitted by mefunigirl on Thu, 06/21/2012 - 11:00pm.
Submitted by SalmaNella on Thu, 06/21/2012 - 1:29pm.
Does anyone know who designed that dress??
dunno, but kristen wiig wore it last month for her last time on snl:
http://www.moviespad.com/photos/kristen-wiig-snl-fa106.jpg
of course...somehow it doesnt even look like the same dress when worn correctly!
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Thanks! There has got to be a copy of it somewhere. I hate to say it but I adore that dress
GG, but HER tongue is SO MUCH worse! It's touched... sweaty ba... ach no, won't go there! lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Ugh! Can you just imagine having your tounge touch his??? Its probably that same feeling you get when you accidentaly bite into bad baloney.
Not one to talk about anyone's mom, but if this mess is true, AND I MEAN "TRUE" TRUE, then may she rot. Mama Kris makes me ill as hell if she is "rolling with the $$ possibilities" of her kids' life experiences and errors. Fking unbelievable.
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"Discussions about what is good, beautiful, noble, pure, true, could always go on. Why is that important? Because that is the only conversation worth having." C.Hitchens,1949-2011. (RIP MCA, "no sleep til Brooklyn") *caprica six was/is here*
Believe me when I say, this image made me gag.
ETA: *leaves thread forever*
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"Physical violence is the least of my priorities." - Drunken Albertan
Submitted by SalmaNella on Thu, 06/21/2012 - 1:29pm.
Does anyone know who designed that dress??
dunno, but kristen wiig wore it last month for her last time on snl:
http://www.moviespad.com/photos/kristen-wiig-snl-fa106.jpg
of course...somehow it doesnt even look like the same dress when worn correctly!
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
She was so stunningly beautiful before she got all that ghastly plastic surgery and became a cum bucket. She could have had a decent career being a stylist to the stars or some such shit, but now she will be forever known as a disgustingly vapid famewhore joke and just plain disgusting.
But really, she never stood a chance with that skank pimp mother she has.
Even just looking at that, I need a tongue condom! ffs aaaaaargh *runs screaming*
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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in any photo I see of her with Kanye, Kim's eyes are screaming "SAVE ME"
the poor frenchman es jest trying to eat ze food...(imaginary french accent)...but being downwind from these arrogant, useless, std ridden fuckheads is ruining the poor guys meal! They (the Gayfish and the Peed on Whore and her nnnaassttaayy family) must be stopped!! Is it the end of the world yet cause I am tired of this shit already...is the zombie acopolypse here yet???? Dayum, if it is would somebody go eat the Kardashians already....instead of poor homeless men in Miami????
nothing sez sexy like to fat pink slug tongues going at it...never saw her tape cause I like to sleep at night, but if this is precursor it must be pretty gross, I used to think Ray J was the sex...but the more I see of this skank the less I respect anyone who stuck it in her...it must be a disease ridden hell hole anyhow..kudos to Kris H. for attempting to put a ring on it...but yech...she has become 100% plastic and I miss her original schnoz, the only thing original of Kim now is her new strains of STD's, none before and none since have been that potent.
Can her face still move?
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Ignore these people and they'll scurry back into the hole they came from... *sigh* I know, I'm delusional.
And that face is how many surgeries ago?
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Submitted by Foxxy Brown
no huge college ball or h.s. prodigy rep coming into the league. name one.
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Wrong again. He played at Univ. Of Minn. which is a Big Ten school. The Big Ten is one of the oldest and best leagues.
He was the first Freshman in league history who ever led the League in Both Scoring and Rebounding.
I totally advanced this theory from the get-go. That sex tape made Kim Kardashian famous and probably rich too. And it was AFTER Paris Hilton's....so it's not like the young "socialites" in Hollywood didn't have a STRONG warning of what happens when you make a sex tape. It was all orchestrated as a means to put Kim on the map and manipulate the cash flow of the tape distribution. It truly makes Kris Kardashian a pimp, whether she actually was this *ahem* hands on.
This lunk head Kris Humphries better have excellent lawyers, because every move he (lunkhead) makes, makes him look even more dumb.
But I would dearly love for depositions to be taken, and made public, on this subject.
Bring on the popcorn and lets watch the destructiom of Babylon Kardashian.
My vision of world peace: a chicken in every pot, and pot for all us chickens...and weasels.
Could this have been a trap set by the KK's to get back at Kris? hmmm I wouldn't put it past them... It's a little too convenient that this ex of Kris' would turn so vile so quickly, just in time for his lawsuit... lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by Brown-EyedGirl on Thu, 06/21/2012 - 1:36pm.
Definitely agree. That ass is phony as a $2 bill. I guess most people don't agree or don't care, but the plastic people of Hollywood don't generally impress me with their purchased hotness.
Kim K. was Paris Hilton's BFF, and they were photographed together. Now, if Kim had that ass at the time, it would have been quite noticeable, especially standing next to Paris' 20-lines-a-day skinny ass. And those whores are never just standing straight on toward the camera, so the only answer is that it wasn't there.
of course she did b/c she's a sick, perverse, moral less c u n t of a human that shat out a wh0re that's as useless as a hooker without a mouth
Submitted by lovesmesomeblackdick on Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:02pm.
Ray-J is a good-looking guy. Just mad sleazy. And we hate him for helping foist the Kardashians on us.
But you may be like me, in that when you know for a fact that a guy has a big one, you can't help but be attracted to him. Nothing wrong with that. Just try not to act on it. That's what they expect.
Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 06/21/2012 - 11:59am.
Hekki, based on the comments, you seem like an incredible person of intellect and substance. Don't say nice things about Kim K. It's not becoming.
THESE 2 FART BUCKETS MUST DIE. NOW.
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♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
i wonder if they employed a special effects cgi team to generate more urine, cuz with cgi these days, they can do anything, they can make avatar or strong yellow piss streams on kim.
AAAAAARGH! CANNOT SCROLL! Will see skanky photo again!
OT: I wouldn't put anything past this family.
Submitted by Poopele on Thu, 06/21/2012 - 2:33pm.
Yes, indeed, the NBA is renowned for the high IQ of it's players.
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HAHA I KNO RITE
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*tosses a bag of hot dicks into Jeanneee's trough* BON APPETIT BITCH! - Raul Duke, 1/26/11
Submitted by Poopele on Thu, 06/21/2012 - 2:32pm
please identify an NBA player who had or has an endorsement contract on being simply 5th in the league in rebounding with no comparable other league leading pro stats AND no huge college ball or h.s. prodigy rep coming into the league. name one.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by Jeanneee
It's heartwarming that someone with such a devastating mental handicap (Kris Humphries) has been able to have such a successful career in the NBA. Most people of his intelligence have a really hard time functioning and end up wards of the state.
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Yes, indeed, the NBA is renowned for the high IQ of it's players.
Submitted by Foxxy Brown
and he would NEVER have received an endorsement contract. NBA bench players do not get endorsement contracts, they might get hired as an extra in their superstar teammate's commercial. might.
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Not a bench player, was 5th in the league in rebounding the season before he married Anthony Quinndashian. Repeated again this year.
Submitted by miz cynical on Thu, 06/21/2012 - 12:38pm.
Honestly, I can't imagine Kanye having sex with anyone except a clone of himself.
But I can see him getting off on bonking someone as notorious as Kim.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by Jeanneee on Thu, 06/21/2012 - 2:16pm.
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Now, that gave me a serious case of the HAHAHAs ;p
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Kitten Kaboodle - a Disney ho who did the ho stroll right ;)
People who want to be famous will do deplorable things to get there. I'm full convinced every actress with name recognition has ridden a casting couch, every boy band member or teen idol
created had their ass invaded by a fat, slimy record executive.
I may not be rich, but unlike these people I don't need a cocktail of prescription meds to sleep at night.
Not that Kim K has a conscious. I'm fully convinced she's a sociopath.
It's heartwarming that someone with such a devastating mental handicap (Kris Humphries) has been able to have such a successful career in the NBA. Most people of his intelligence have a really hard time functioning and end up wards of the state.
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*tosses a bag of hot dicks into Jeanneee's trough* BON APPETIT BITCH! - Raul Duke, 1/26/11
With her mutilated face, practically synthetic from head to toe body, complete lack of substance, intellect, soul or talent, how anyone can look at this trashy sow and still see anything remotely "beautiful" or interesting about her is baffling to me.
Wow. Look at the size of honker in that shot! I'm surprised she hasn't changed the artwork on the DVD yet.
There's a Kanye-Kim baby on the horizon any day now. I just know this whore is going to get knocked up in 3, 2, 1...
I saw a clip of that tape and at the beginning when she's standing wearing jeans, she does not have that big ass. Not even close.
So something definitely was done there.
Does anyone know who designed that dress??
You know this is true since PMK directed her pb shoot.
Yeah, she doesnt even look like her debute porn tape anymore.
at least this time she isn't wearing booties with her dress. Her legs are short to begin with, makes them look downright stumpy when she wears boots.
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And I could liken you to a lot of things but I always come around
'Cause in the end I'm a sensible girl, I know the fiction of the fix
Submitted by mynameisstolen on Thu, 06/21/2012 - 1:14pm.
I like that dress though. I'm going to look on ebay for a chinese knockoff.
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The dress and shoes are flawless.
I like that dress though. I'm going to look on ebay for a chinese knockoff.
I like the dress & the shoes. *apologizes in advance*