Behold, The Highest-Paid Actress In Hollywood
The face you just made after reading that headline had more raw emotions and layers of expression in it than the same sedated face Kristen Stewart makes in every frame of every movie she's in and bitch is still making more money than all of us combined. Forbes put out their annual rich white women in Hollywood list and KStew leads that shit with $34.5 million. That's like $1 for every blink she makes in that Twatlight mess. Yeah, fuck all of our lives.
To come up with their list, Forbes added up what each actress made in upfront pay, profit participation, residuals, endorsements and advertising work. Since Twihards throw $100 bills at KStew every time their coochies twitch while watching her kiss on RPattz, it's no surprise that bitch is cutting her weed with white gold flakes. But beyond KStew, most of Forbes' list is a long skid mark of unflavored vom. It's a mess. Cameron Diaz? Sarah Jessica Parker? Those two should be on Forbes' Middlest-Paid list (or a list of Hollywood actresses who can eat your innocent dreams with their faces), not Forbes' Highest-Paid list. The entire list is below and if it helps, just block out the word "million" and pretend Cammy made $34 total last year.
10. Jennifer Aniston - $12 million
9. Kristen Wiig - $12 million
8. Meryl Streep - $12 million
7. SJP - $15 million
6. Julia Roberts - $16 million
5. Charlize Theron - $18 million
4. Angie Jolie - $20 million
3. Sandra Bullock - $25 million
2. Cameron Diaz - $34 million
1. KStew - $34.5 million
It's depressing that KStew makes almost three times as much as Meryl Streep. If you ripped off one of Meryl's toe corns, put a brown wig on it and pushed it in front of a camera, it would exude more real emotions than KStew does. But I can't fully hate on that mouth breather. Bitch gets paid millions upon millions of dollars to hot box in her trailer for hours and drool out a few written lines in front of a camera before going back to her trailer to hot box some more. Lip bite all the way to the bank, bitch.
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Submitted by parissucksliterally on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 12:51pm.
YES! YES! ANGELINA MAKES 8 MILLION DOLLARS MORE FOR A MOVIE THAN THAT TICKY CHINISTON!!!
*barfs*
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Yes, but who has more Twitter followers?
I guess Hollywood isn't as shallow as I thought they were, because Kirsten is FUG.
YES! YES! ANGELINA MAKES 8 MILLION DOLLARS MORE FOR A MOVIE THAN THAT TICKY CHINISTON!!!
*barfs*
NONE of them should make that money. And wtf with Cammie Diaz still up there? with that ruined face of hers?
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I understand about indecision
But I don't care if I get behind
People living in competition
All I want is to have my peace of mind
Submitted by kate773 on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 12:28pm.
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 10:31am.
Alert: New Brangie post in JJ.
quick OT, sorry:
ok, which one of you fools is "Warwick Davis" because THAT belongs in a museum. hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
OT:
i hate everyone on this list except Streep and Theron. all i got.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
"just block out the word million and pretend Cammy made $34 total last year."
If KStew got paid $34.50 for her acting "skills" it would be too much.
Who did this bitch blow to get this far in Hollywood?
Meryl Streep is a gift to stage and screen.
The jaw on this one - is that an over or under bite? They say Anniston has a chin - this one's chin has a chin.
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Dark-sided!
Re: My previous comment, not that I meant to exclude Streep, who is heaven. I'm referring to current Hollywood starlets.
Streep is an icon, and has managed to stay so beautiful, she's my memaw crush.
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"I have a very poor way of concealing my dislike of people and/or things." -- Evil_Cupcake's Mom
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 10:31am.
Alert: New Brangie post in JJ.
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Is it the Malificent one?
"Angelina Jolie: 'Maleficent' Set in England!"
Submitted by CokeyBloke on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 12:09pm.
Errr, since errrbody's been talking about JJ, I went there and THAT BITCH broke my computer
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REALLY!!! I haven't heard anyone else having a problem!! That sucks big time...
Kristen Stewart is so beautiful, but she always makes the such insecure faces, which cancel out any trace of beauty. Fuck is wrong with that girl? I hate it when actors try so hard to appear "normal." If you were normal, no one would care about you. The reason you're in Hollywood is because you're supposedly extraordinary. KStew....let yourself be great.
We have so few superstars now. This is why I love Charlize. I think she's the best representation of what a true star is supposed to be. She always looks her best (not that it's hard for her) and she comes across as cool, glamourous, and other-worldy, even in jeans.
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"I have a very poor way of concealing my dislike of people and/or things." -- Evil_Cupcake's Mom
Mediocrity reigns in today's world.
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Who are you calling silly cow?
Our society has finally devolved to the point that mediocrity is celebrated and rewarded.
Nadine Cross: We… are… dead… and… this… is… Hell!
It's good to see meryl on the list....you know how hollywood feels about older actresses so the fact that she's still making money is awesome.
♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫
Miss your fucked up ways on my fucked up days.
Errr, since errrbody's been talking about JJ, I went there and THAT BITCH broke my computer! The site came up about 50 times, I lost about 3 pages of a document I'd written, and I had to actually unplug my desktop.
How's this, Cuss Police: FUCK YOU, JARED.
Ridiculous.
It's totally undeserved, but the only reason she made that much is because the Twatlight studio threw her $25 million or so. Now that this horrific franchise is almost over, she'll never see that kind of money again. Even Holie is a more deserving recipient, and I can't stand that Vampirella bitch.
Submitted by letinstar on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 11:40am.
Undoubtedly sucking the best is how she got her roles.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by vsminimoose on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 11:43am.
What is JJ? I'm ASHAMED to be asking me this but could someone link me?
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It's a website called Just Jared. It is known as the home of rabid Jolie / Pitt fans and basically where the term Brangeloonies was coined. We go over on any of the latest Angie or Brad threads and say unkind thing to the loons about Ang or Brad or both and they freak out on you. Right now they are getting bombed so you might not get a reaction from them BUT if you have the need to feel like you're in Grade 8 again then have at it!!
She looks high as fuck in that pic.
vsminimoose Just Jared, where the loons roam free on the plains
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
I don't personally dislike Anniston but the fact remains that she never crossed over successfully from TV. Why the HELL does she get paid anything for making flop after flop?
Submitted by islandgirl on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 11:40am.
Submitted by BitchyD on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 11:35am.
When the hell did SJP last come out with a movie good enough to be payed more than Streep?
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The remake of Seabiscuit? I hear the price of oats has skyrocketed. :)
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I'm dying of laughter right now.
KStew must fuck like a rabbid zombie slut on acid, and she must be down for anything, she will swallow jizz, garggle it and snowball (dont google it) for any rich hollywood types, so they will cast her.
How else can she earn more than meryl streep???
What is JJ? I'm ASHAMED to be asking me this but could someone link me?
I know most people here hate KStew, but considering that Twilight is a series of 5 films, the actors get paid more money because they become indispensable. Also, last year she was paid $1 for every $55.83 that her films earned.
Once Twilight is over she won't appear on that list anymore.
"Submitted by SANS FARDS on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 11:21am.
Snow White & the Huntsman wasn't actually all that bad. BUT, it was all Charlize. KStew has the personality of a wet paper bag. Perfect for the character of Bella (and for Ana, if 50 Shades of Grey ever gets filmed) "
WORD! hey SF were you the person that was reading The Passage?
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
Based on merit, eight or nine of these names deserve to be scrubbing Julianne Moore's toilet.
Fuck, I think I finally hate everything.
I agree. K Spew should be one of the eight.
Submitted by BitchyD on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 11:35am.
When the hell did SJP last come out with a movie good enough to be payed more than Streep?
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The remake of Seabiscuit? I hear the price of oats has skyrocketed. :)
when you get right down to it, most of the things are this list with the exception of meryl streep and charlize ther kinda suck anyways...kstew just happen to suck the best...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
I worship at the temple of Streep. I've gotten so much mileage out of my Out Of Africa impression of her. "I had a farm in Africa" bitch, it was a plantation. Anyway, I was surprised to see her so far down the line. Below SJP? When the hell did SJP last come out with a movie good enough to be payed more than Streep?
Now that this little bitch is the highest paid actress in Hollywood-and man, is it painful to type those words-maybe now she can make good on her promise to retire.
I could careless about any of these actresses-except Streep-but Stewart annoys the shit out of me with her surly-girl b.s. Also, as much as her fans gush, I don't think she's pretty much less beautiful. Indeed, she is remarkably plain-looking, IMHO.
My first post on JJ! I did not know that words like "bastard" and "slut" were censored. Shame!
This doesn't kill me; most of those other actresses are crap, too. I mean, Adam Sandler gets millions for churning out the same dreck year after year. It's whatever sells and she, for reasons I can't fathom, sells.
* * * * * * * * * * *
Please: It's "rahnday."
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 10:54am.
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 10:49am.
I didn't want to out myself but I jumped on board last night and MY GOD this is fun. I was laughing into my pillow as I was typing last night.
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OMG not another one, LMFAO, brilliant:)
Have they called you an Aniston lover yet or a Jen hag or you know you've arrived when they tell you to "go scream at the ocean"
It IS addicting as you can see by all these bitches laughing their asses off!
And to whoever said KStew could play Lisa Marie in a movie- YES! I thought she was an illegitimate Elvis progeny when I first saw her.
I could believe that, since the Twilight series was so popular, but since when does Cameron Diaz rate anymore??
$34.5 million? Damn...
Life is totally not fair...
Snow White & the Huntsman wasn't actually all that bad. BUT, it was all Charlize. KStew has the personality of a wet paper bag. Perfect for the character of Bella (and for Ana, if 50 Shades of Grey ever gets filmed) because she's a petulant pissy teenager, but not good in anything else I've seen.
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"You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."
- Yogi Berra
Submitted by mr. grumpus on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 10:44am.
the top four are massively overpaid!
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They're all overpaid!
What's worse is that they are all (apart from Streep) seemingly DUMB as rocks. I'm not talking innocently naive or having a derr moment once in a while, I mean seriously DUMB. I saw an interview with Theron recently and the host made a joke. The joke wasn't trying to be witty, it was just a simple joke. It took Theron a minute to actually get it and then she gaffawed, threw her head back, repeated the one-line and said "that's amazing." Amazing? Really? I've noticed that Stewart does that too. Using words out of context. Stupidity must have rubbed off from one to the other (maybe?).
Anyway, they are all overpaid. Maybe stupid is the wrong word to refer to them since they must be doing something 'right' in some people's eyes to get paid as much as they do, but then again, I don't rate success and intelligence with income.
I refuse to see Snow White...in what world is KStew "fairer" than Charlize??? When I saw the first Twilight all I focus on was how many times this bitch blinked...that was her acting technique...BLINKING!??
#9 and #5 are the only actual actresses worth a damn on this list. This makes me mad. Nothing against Cameron Diaz, but how on earth is she making that kind of money? and KStew? fucking please. I'm surprised Blohan isn't on this list.
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"You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."
- Yogi Berra
Meryl Street deserves to be number one. But, they all get paid too much for what they do.
LOL BB! dip!
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
No jewelry on, so the focus is on her beautiful face. It looks like she has a dip in her mouth.
Submitted by Chris Knight on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 10:54am.
THE ONLY ONE WHO DESERVES HER MONEY FROM THAT LIST IS MERYL STREEP. THE REST CAN ABSOLUTELY GO TO HELL!
^^^^^All of this^^^^^
This is appalling - it literally sickens me.
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
Submitted by TexnDoc on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 11:03am.
Fortunately the author is too lazy to write any more books, or else she'd probably produce an assload of sequels and we'd be saddled with more crappy sparklepire movies.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Random but I think she looks like Lisa Marie and could play her in a movie. On subject she's way overpaid for the amount of effort she puts into her work.
Let's hope they all declare residency in California with multiple estates in the 'Bu, Beverly Hills, etc...state is broke, could use the tax revenue.
Most represented on this list don't seem particularly intelligent; good news is most of their money will likely be gone within a generation or two.
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"Dude is like a human version of a white, windowless van" - Michael K.
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 10:46am.
Submitted by skinny fat on Wed, 06/20/2012 - 10:36am.
I'm banned from JJ.
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LOL, Really what did you say? They say they only ban you for 48 hours but I got the boot for near 2 years!
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I guess I posted one too many nasty ass things about St Angie Ho and JJ banned me. Bunch of raging assholes there. If St. Angie Ho told them to jump off a bridge they'd do it. It's quite frightening *shudder