Lindsay Lohan Doesn't Know If She Wants To Get Naked On Camera Again
That's like me saying that I'm not sure if I want to shove this Zinger down my throat until I hear it land in my stomach. But we'll play along with LiLo anyway. Lindsay Lohan apparently hasn't yet signed her name in White Oprah's blood to star with porn star James Deen in Bret Easton Ellis' The Canyons, because she's not sure she wants to bare her chichi sacks for the millionth time. In that straight-to-Netflix soft-core mess, LiLo's character humps on James Deen, humps on other dudes, humps girls and humps anything else that will stay still long enough for her to hump on. A source tells Radar that LiLo is getting all demure and modest and shit, and is thinking that maybe she wants to keep her nipples covered for once. Yeah, this is the comedy portion of LiLo's act. Cue up the laugh track.
"Lindsay and her team are concerned about the nudity that is involved. Lindsay would be required to do full frontal nudity, and the sex scenes are very, very graphic. Yes, Lindsay has posed nude for Playboy, but doing it in a movie is completely different. Lindsay needs to make sure that she is comfortable with it, and that this is something she can handle as an artist. It's expected that Lindsay will sign the contract in the next two weeks, as filming begins at the beginning of July. Lindsay has admired Bret's work for a very long time, and one of her favorite movies is Less Than Zero."
Yes, Lindsay Lohan is an artist and she's just going through her Lifetime phase right now. Remember when Picasso went through his "selling placemats of his artwork on QVC" phase? It's kind of like that. But really, it wasn't that long ago when LiLo was going to flirt lipstick out of a dog's peen in a movie and THIS is too much for her? Either LiLo is just trying to get more money (and since this is some low-budget shit that's not going to happen) or she's stalling until they make Photoshop for moving pictures. If all else fails, they should just get White Oprah to be LiLo's body double. Nobody will know the difference and White Oprah will do it for whatever's in your medicine cabinet or whatever's in that cup you're holding. Bitch ain't picky.
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Please, if she wasnt so eager to show her jugs she wouldnt have gotten the part in Machete! Anybody could have dont that...no acting involved. Her raspy voice was enough to lose her the part if it werent all the gratuitous tit shots.
This is her "respectable" ticket into pornography although I've seen more class on that Gypsy/Traveller Wedding nonsense.
And the way her team throws the word "artist" around in her PR, when she doesn't even qualify as an "artiste", is amusing.
I'm convinced that she gets mainstream roles because she sleeps with the people in power. As for this porn offer, she's holding out for more $ but she'll accept the role at some point. Ultimately, I predict that her "career" will be in porn because nobody else will hire her.
She is a walking, crawling, fucking STD. I am over 40 years old, have 2 kids, was a late stage alcoholic and now 3 years sober, and if I woke up in a mudpit full of vomit with La Toya Jackson licking it off me, I would still look better than this bitch.
Dear Blohan,
We have already seen your tits, your bits and your ass. Numerous times. For free. Why try modesty now? #getmoneybitch
Yeah, you and Kim K...the chaste twins.
She admires Bret? Bitch probably didn't even know who he was.
If they put a black bar over the face this picture would be a lot better.
Submitted by jsl48813 on Fri, 06/15/2012 - 1:46am.
...plus it's inspiring to me to think that james deen...will be playing a role that will not enable him to fuck lindsay lohan's asshole.
The role won't enable him to fuck LiLo's asshole. She'll enable him to do that herself. :-P
(edited for HTML errors, sorry)
oh (throws up back of the hand to forehead), it's HELL being an "artiste" - poor dear - PLEASE BITCH, we've all seen your hipless, butless ass and nekkid, overripe melons so many times we could draw a diagram and section you off like they do a side of fucking beef!
NEXT!!
She's gotten a few jobs so now she feels she's in a position to be "concerned" about the nudity. But the next time the offers dry up (which will be soon) and she is strapped for cash, she'll find a way to get over the concern real quick.
Submitted by dementa on Fri, 06/15/2012 - 10:09am.
Submitted by skinny fat on Fri, 06/15/2012 - 9:38am.
Do you think she'd survive an anti-Semitic rant a la Sheen/Gibson?
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for reasons that are a complete mystery to me, i think this arrogant useless twat could survive ANYTHING and still get paid to do movies or photoshoots however trashy and crappy. she ALWAYS falls on her feet.
translation: "gimme more money"
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♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
There are two reasons for this proclamation:
1) bitch did not get hired or,
2) bitch wants more money.
Fuck she is certainly getting a lot of publicity since smashing that car. She is in the news everyday. I wish she'd Fuck Off, permanently.
Submitted by skinny fat on Fri, 06/15/2012 - 9:38am.
Do you think she'd survive an anti-Semitic rant a la Sheen/Gibson?
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
You all know this useless cunt is going to get her comeback, don't you? She'll be paid millions to do mainstream Hollyweird movies in 6-12 months. No matter what she does, she gets away with it. This time it was crashing into the rear of a truck AND lying to the police. Bitch has more lives than a freakin cat.
Submitted by Thamar: "Some lives are just lessons in what not to do.Lyndsay Lohan's life is like that."
Exactly.
See also: Suleman, Nadya.
"As an artist..."
Some lives are just lessons in what not to do.Lyndsay Lohan's life is like that.
Submitted by mitchyul on Fri, 06/15/2012 - 8:08am.
Does anyone really care?
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THIS. I'm not buying the Playboy explanation thing, not to mention all the Pervy Uncle Terry pictures (and you know he tapped that a few times. Vomit.).
i'm over this entitled skank...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Yuck. she's just thinking this will bring more publicity and it did, right"
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"I didn't know whether to shit or go blind, so I closed one eye and farted"
We don't want to see your spaniel's ears, or anything else for that matter, thankyou very much.
Does anyone really care?
At this point, Jackie Stallone is sexier than Blohan:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4keJdGJAYM&feature=player_embedded#!
Do your boobs hang low, do they bobble to and fro..............
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"Birds are doomed when pussies can fly"- MK
Submitted by jsl48813 on Fri, 06/15/2012 - 1:46am.
Considering most people in porn look pretty rode hard and put away wet, it's pretty sad when they look freshfaced next to Blohan.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Should this movie fall through because of her insurance premium, she can now tell everyone that she wasn't comfortable doing the nude scenes. She's an arteest, ya' know.
James Peen.
I am...doll parts...bad skin...doll heart.
i have seen james deen and he's impressive cuz he looks a lot closer to 26 than lindsay lohan does.. plus it's inspiring to me to think that james deen is doing cross-over work now, and will be playing a role that will not enable him to fuck lindsay lohan's asshole.
"Limp lasagna with eggplant boobs", "baboon ass lips", "armpit vagina". You guys never disappoint me!
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Who are you calling silly cow?
Loopy, lindsay's armpit vagina*lindsay's armpit vagina*lindsay's armpit vagina*lindsay's armpit vagina*lindsay's armpit vagina*lindsay's armpit vagina - AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
That's all you need to say ROTFL!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Oh PUUHHHLEEEEZE. This stupid arrogant entitled little dumbass used to readily flash her cooter, back in the 2007 shitney spears era, to get attention. She's just milking this for more publicity. She'd happily sell a video of herself taking a dump if she thought it would supply her with the money & attention she craves on a daily basis...
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"Dammit, Pam, I've seen that, and now I can't unsee it. There's not enough liquor or therapy in the world to help me forget that..." - Archer
If you've seen Johan's acting recently...I firmly believe she's the type of person who could act great up until she became self-aware to the point to where her "acting" ability is no more. It's at that point I firmly believe.
During Debbie Downer - she was great...
The Next SNL appearance - 100% completely different person. Terrible...unfunny...
I don't know much about how it works as I am not an actor/actress but as a guy that is more behind the camera...I know I suck at acting...she's just become self-aware..something you cannot be as an actor/actress. She's doomed and it's not just fom partying too much or plastic surgery. It's her mind that's the enemy.
"Less Than Zero" the book was good. The movie sucked ass.
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Beyond the door
There's peace, I'm sure
And I know there'll be no more
Tears in heaven
Submitted by WithinReason... on Fri, 06/15/2012 - 1:09am.
well thats the thing, she is in her 20s but her body is like some 80year old man.
plus her armpit vagina was not plump liek tyra bank's armpit vagina.
lindsay's armpit vagina was stained like a patch work of tanning lotion, and had way too many folds, it was like thick curtains, there were layers and layers and layers.
And who deflated her baboon ass lips?
I love how her people always point out whomever she's going to be working with is a "favorite" of hers. Bitch doesn't even know her dealer's name. Everyone is probably "Hey, you" to her in real life.
Loopy the miracle of photoshop is EVIL like that! But how can she be so bat *floppity-flop* saggy? WTH, coke bloat? Can't imagine a 20-something performer just leaving the FLAB in FOLDS to hang like that! AHHHHH You're gonna make me google this dang-episode, I just know it! Where are the before PS shots of that ass, man? Where? Cuz I have a feeling they are sick! *not if Uncle Pervy took them though* I can't stand that bitch!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Lindsay please. the only thing people want to see you do at this point is fuck on camera. How many people are waiting for her porn career to start? We already know she's a hooker.
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Beyond the door
There's peace, I'm sure
And I know there'll be no more
Tears in heaven
Submitted by WithinReason... on Fri, 06/15/2012 - 12:11am.
yeh she looks okay there thanks to the miracles of adobe photoshop lol.
but her bat wings were flapping in the wind in that episode of glee.
she just looked horrible, over tan, tons of makeup, saggy skin, like one of the biggest loser contestants who just lost 50kilograms in 4 weeks.
plus her ass would need a double, because i imagine hohans ass would be like, and i repeat, that old guy on sex and the city episode, who bangs samantha and then he gets up to go to the toilet and she sees his saggy ass.
it was just nasssttyy.
"as an artist..." how do they say that with a straight face?
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"I felt very still & very empty, the way the eye of a tornado must feel, moving dully along in the middle of the surrounding hullabaloo."
Less than Zero was so shitty. The book was overrated too.
Who is she fooling? She'll be doing straight up porn within 5 years anyway.
Remember when Picasso went through his "selling placemats of his artwork on QVC" phase?
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Actually, in the 1960's Picasso did flood the market with prints to a boatload of cash.
Her Canyon is grand...as MJ would say just beat it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zFE10JBcZoo&feature=related
We've all already seen very, very graphic images of her canyon. As I recall, it was sandy and covered with wilted scrub brush.
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Please: It's "rahnday."
Submitted by loopygorilla on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 11:21pm.
... just tone up first before you show ure used goods, cuz i dont wanna see bat wings, rolls, excess skin and panama canal.
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Picky picky Loopy, hhahahahah. This snap shot of her side-tittay looks good, is it very old? Face is giving THE LOOK, all fine so far *and I don't even like her* But you did say she was flapping in the wind loose on SNL, didn't see it but I'll take your word for it! LOL ;D
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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"Cue up the laugh track." - HELL YA, she's being coy to get mo' money!... lol Ho gotta price, nothing wrong with that! ;)
I don't remember that phase with Picasso, no... but I heard he used to pay his restaurant tab with on-the-spot sketches on napkins! Bet the servers LOVED that shit! (probably worth a fortune now...)
Do it Lindsay, DO IT! I hear Deen has the goods! LOL
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I wish someone would tell her freshly fucked hair is not the look for all photographs.