"Guuuuurrrrrl, Remember The Time I Pulled On Your Pubes?"
"....I couldn't get the scent of butt syrup, curdled goat milk, burnt barley and lube designed to smell like Matt Lauer's saliva off my fingers for days. Don't ask me how I know about that last one."
So You Think You Can Dance's Mia Michaels was a choreographer on Cock of Ages and one of her jobs was to turn Tommy Girl into a hot-blooded heterosexual thrusting sex machine. I heard that Mia got Tommy to thrust his Thetans off by holding a rubber replica of David Beckham's butt in front of him. Yes, they had to remove the butt in post-production, but that took less work than getting Tommy to thrust on his own. Anyway, Mia tells Vulture that she got so close to Tommy that at one point her hands went somewhere not many women have been before: his Scientolobush. Surprisingly, when Mia's fingers touched Tommy's pubic beard, his crotch Thetans didn't bite at her hand.
"I watched him transform physically from being a classic sexy man into a rock star. And it was awesome watching the transformation.
My hands were all over him at all times, but when you're working, you don't think about that. My hands were inside his pants at one point, pulling him, pulling his pubes, and it was just part of the choreography. It was just very funny, because when you're in the dance, it doesn't matter. It's about if it's right, and if it is, let's go with it."
What kind of choreography calls for pube yanking? That's some Fifty Shades of Grey: The Ballet kind of shit.
I take back what I said about OctoMom's self-love porn. The image of Mia Michaels staring into Tommy's eyes as she touched his dick mane is the most disturbing thing that has hit my mind today. I bet as Mia's fingers hovered above Tommy's Scientolopeen, she thought to herself, "I've only been with men, but for years they've been saying that I love to do lyrical moves with my tongue on lady labia. Maybe I should explore that more..."
Here's Tommy shooting scenes for Oblivion with Olga Kurylenko in NYC yesterday. I don't know how I should knowing that Tommy grows his pubes out and doesn't get a Brazilian wax next to John Travolta on Scientology spa Sundays.
• 
hey Whammy we're all the same height lying down so don't worry about such superficial things.
I don't care how tall a dude is as long as he's funny, has a job, his own teef oh and can rock my world in the old sackaroo ; )
Tommy Boy (or the "little runt" as my dad calls him) seems to have done pretty well for his self despite being a couch jumping loon.
Submitted by SalmaNella on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 3:03pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 2:56pm.
Submitted by IrishFury on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 2:27pm.
My last bf was 5'8 and slight but he was a demon in the sack and real genuinely nice guy. That is all that matters!! ;-)
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I like to think I've got THAT part covered anyway..LOL :P
Oh wait, I thought you were calling me Snowy. I see that you were quoting her.
Uhhh, I'm calm again. I hope you like huge curves.
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Dark-sided!
saw the latest Mission Impossible movie, when he was climbing that hotel, it was really sexy. He is an attractive man but that sciento thing just freaks me out, my fantasies then disappear!
Coma Caca!
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Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 3:07pm.
Submitted by snowpiece on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 3:00pm.
oh Whamo! don't dash all our hopes like that!!
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Submitted by IrishFury on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 3:00pm.
Whamo, my goodness, you are not much taller than me!
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LOL, yes sorry Snowy, I am what I am..
I have a big heart if that helps:)...and I know what the next question is and only the lucky ones know the answer to that one:P
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SNOWY? SNOWY? GODDAM CHEATER!
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Dark-sided!
DAMN - I thought that was a really unflattering picture of Maggie Gyllenhaal with Tammy.
5'9" is tall.
Oh Salma, its ok!
Also, I weigh about 300 lbs. I know that you'll feel the same way...if Whamo doesn't like me for my size, then he's not the right fake-man for me.
Right, Whamo?
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 2:56pm.
I watched that Knight and Day (?) movie with him and Cameron
Couldn't get through the first 20 minutes of that shitfest.
Submitted by snowpiece on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 3:00pm.
oh Whamo! don't dash all our hopes like that!!
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Submitted by IrishFury on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 3:00pm.
Whamo, my goodness, you are not much taller than me!
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LOL, yes sorry Snowy, I am what I am..
I have a big heart if that helps:)...and I know what the next question is and only the lucky ones know the answer to that one:P
dear lord, today is just the day of disturbia. the world needs to sit its kinky ass down already. is it international goatse day?! hahahahah
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"Let them measure my anus and see if it is dilated."
- Andrés García Torres, inventor of the Catholic Anus Ruler
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 2:56pm.
Submitted by IrishFury on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 2:27pm.
I'm sorry but for his age, TC is a damn good looking man and he got braces for his teeth instead of veneers
==================================
I have to agree with you Ms Fury and ME Tommy DOES look good for his age and if he's had work done it's subtle enough to not to stand out.
I watched that Knight and Day (?) movie with him and Cameron and I have to admit I thought there were some really funny parts in it AND after watching the extras like I always do I'm damn impressed at the all the stunt work Tommy does on his own. I'm torn and fell dirty for having to tell you this but I have to be honest.
Speaking of honest.....I read your love of tall TALL men and I worry about us Ms Fury for I am but 5' 9" and that's after hanging by my feet for an hour. I can be a lot of things my dear but taller ain't gonna be one of them.
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If Ms. Fury doesn't want you because of your height then she is not the woman for you. (Sorry, Irish, don't beat me up!)
My last bf was 5'8 and slight but he was a demon in the sack and real genuinely nice guy. That is all that matters!! ;-)
Whamo, my goodness, you are not much taller than me! In heels, I shall tower over you! (not really, not too much).
I've always been drawn to tall men for some reason. Like, tall as in the absolute shortest I'd want to date is 6'2". My husband is 6'5". I'd like a bit taller than that but I have forgiven him.
However! There are exceptions to every rule, my little Whamalicious!
Of course, if you ever posted a pic, I'd know a little more...
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Dark-sided!
oh Whamo! don't dash all our hopes like that!!
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
Sorry, but he ain't no rock star. True rock stars have to exude cool without trying - or a least they have to make it seem that they don't try. Tom Cruise is incapable of cool, especially effortless cool.
Yo lady, leather pants don't make you a rock star. And I suspect if you were pulling on his pubes, it led to him running out screaming cuz a girl got close to his "danger zone."
Also, all the promotional material I've seen screams, "I LOVE BOOBS! See how much I love boobs? I'm surrounded by sexy women, meaning I'm so totally heterosexual! BOOBS! VAGINAS! They're wonderful! I'm not gay!"
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 2:56pm.
Submitted by IrishFury on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 2:27pm.
I'm sorry but for his age, TC is a damn good looking man and he got braces for his teeth instead of veneers
+++
I couldn't stop thinking that something was wrong with his face when I saw Ghost Protocol (temporarily lifted my Tammy Cruise ban only because of Jeremy Renner).
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 2:54pm.
SalmaNella, start a petition to replace or put up another tree. City councils hate it when people wake up and take action.
____________________
I've done that and the town council told me that it is his land and he can do whatever he wants. If he wants to pave it over and put in 100 condos he can do it. :-(((
Today is a sad day and not just because of having Chris Brown, OctoMom, and a floating head on the D.
i hate to say this but the barley water is keeping tommy in fine form...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Submitted by SalmaNella on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 2:50pm.
OT: Another lovely big tree was pulled down in my neighbourhood. How many more McMansions do we need? Fuck developers.
++++
That fucking sucks. The guy that owns my friend's neighborhood cut down all the trees and left the logs and stumps after a few people requested that one or two trees be cut down. Then he skipped town and nobody can find him anywhere.
Fucking weird.
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
Is Mia Michaels suffering from an illness? Why is she looking like Steven Cojocaru?
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"Bye, Whore" -MK
Why is she telling us this? Like anybody would give a shit. Obviously paid by CO$ to enhance Tommy girls masculinity. She is a mess.
tammy got pube hair?
ima sick of all the photo ops & promo for this shit movie
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
Submitted by IrishFury on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 2:27pm.
I'm sorry but for his age, TC is a damn good looking man and he got braces for his teeth instead of veneers
==================================
I have to agree with you Ms Fury and ME Tommy DOES look good for his age and if he's had work done it's subtle enough to not to stand out.
I watched that Knight and Day (?) movie with him and Cameron and I have to admit I thought there were some really funny parts in it AND after watching the extras like I always do I'm damn impressed at the all the stunt work Tommy does on his own. I'm torn and fell dirty for having to tell you this but I have to be honest.
Speaking of honest.....I read your love of tall TALL men and I worry about us Ms Fury for I am but 5' 9" and that's after hanging by my feet for an hour. I can be a lot of things my dear but taller ain't gonna be one of them.
SalmaNella, start a petition to replace or put up another tree. City councils hate it when people wake up and take action.
Dude, WUT?
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 2:49pm.
SalmaNella, regarding Tommy Gal's plastic surgeon, I believe he goes to some top notch speciality clinic in Brazil. I forget the name of the actual surgeon...I read it here on the D sometime in the last year. Sorry to be so vague but I has the olds.
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The surgeon does fantastic work. I'm in awe.
Is it gross-out day on Dlisted?
OT: Another lovely big tree was pulled down in my neighbourhood. How many more McMansions do we need? Fuck developers.
SalmaNella, regarding Tommy Gal's plastic surgeon, I believe he goes to some top notch speciality clinic in Brazil. I forget the name of the actual surgeon...I read it here on the D sometime in the last year. Sorry to be so vague but I has the olds.
Hekki: yes, it's a source of conflict between us, because I CAIN'T STAND MIA MICHAELS! LOL
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
STEVEN CUJOCARU???
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
I have to agree he looks good - but he's still a short little puke and I don't like most of his movies.
snowy: Uh oh... I love MJT, but that Mia Michaels person looks like Cojo in that photo.
Tommy's one of the last movie "superstars" remaining. Soon all we'll be left with is assholes like Robert Pattinson to headline movies.
That Olga chick is foxy.
And oh, how I hate the $cientos, but I think Tom is a great actor and I usually like his movies.
I thought that was Queen Latifah in that picture with Tommy...
Diamond/Taste of the Wild Pet Food Recall - http://www.diamondpet.com/information/
www.petfinder.com - enter your zip code to find adoptable pets in your area.
www.animalrescuesite.com - click everyday to help feed animals in shelters.
Hekki: Miss Jane LUUURVS Mia!
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
That quote is fucking retarded. Pulling on his lubes?!
Submitted by doncorleone on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 2:28pm.
I'm officially in hell
_____________________
Between this and "crotch thetans" I am cracking the fuck up.
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*tosses a bag of hot dicks into Jeanneee's trough* BON APPETIT BITCH! - Raul Duke, 1/26/11
Is that Stephen Cojocaru? Who is that person? I'm scared!
And Tom looks fantastic for a 50 year old dude. I want whoever did his plastic surgery. That is top notch artistry.
No, no, no! If Olga goes to the dark side, I'll have to boycott Magic City! (BTW, it's fun and campy and slutty and so what if it makes Twatlight look like Citizen Kane -- shut up, horz :P)
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Kitten Kaboodle - a Disney ho who did the ho stroll right ;)
OkOKOKOK FINE. Tommy Girl does not look bad for his age and is in tip top shape.
*cries for what Val Kilmer used to be*
He looks good and can act. To bad about the cult he belongs too.
WTF is going on with Tommy Girls front toof? Why is it red/black at the gum line?
*flosses*
I'm officially in hell
I'm sorry but for his age, TC is a damn good looking man and he got braces for his teeth instead of veneers (which is obvious when you look at him) and has enough lines on his face to make him look good as an older guy.
Gay, straight, Sciento-loon or whatever, he looks really good and is in great shape.
He's my height though and I love tall, tall men.
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Dark-sided!
What I want to know is who is Tommygirl's plastic surgeon? He keeps looking younger each photo op.
There you go Janey! MK posted about your fave girl, and she's looking esp lovely here! ;p
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky