Open Post: Hosted By Madge's Nalgas
Everybody in Milan better hang horseshoes from their nipples and protect their eyeballs with evil-eye sunglasses, because I have a feeling that Madge will open a box of dark-sidedness by flashing her sith holocron crotch (sith holocrotch?) at her show tomorrow night. I mean, I am sensing a shameless theme here.
Madge flashed tit faucet at her show in Turkey on Thursday night and during her show in Rome last night, she showed the audience what cracking nutsacks with her nalgas has done to her 53-year-old ass. So yeah, nipple in Turkey, ass cheeks in Rome, madgepoon in Milan, feed from a live colon cam in Florence and after that she'll just start showing audiences x-rays of her internal organs.
Some whores have been saying shit about this picture like "Granny cut her Metamucil with vodka again!" and "Save it for strip poker night at Shady Pines, granny!" First of all, Madge has the body of a roided-up hairless cat and not the body of a typical granny. Second of all, Madge might be a 105-year-old vampire, but she's not a granny yet. Third of all, if your granny got up on the table and flashed her lace thong Depends, you'd throw caramel squares at her while showering her with praise for representing the family name right! I know I would. But my abuelita would never do that. If she wanted to flash anything, she'd have to take off the sofa throw she wears over her shoulders, take off both cardigans and by the time she was about to take off the t-shirt she wears over her housedress, she'd be ready for a cold compress and a nap.
via UsWeekly (Thanks, Becky)
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Batdog's site is shut down????? Why for????
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
The 6th fleet doesn't count as one man, whore. Nice try.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Keep the change, ya filthy animal, I certainly did not!
I bonk one man only and he wishes it were more often!
*reads Bible and offers her dirty pillows up to The Lord*
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Dark-sided!
Woof!
You bonked Whamo, didn't you?!?!
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by Dog on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 6:25pm.
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 6:10pm.
Um, hi.
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WHY YOU FUCKIN LOW-DOWN DIRTY WHORE DOG! DON'T SPEAK TO ME! I AM YOUR MASTER! BOW DOWN AND KNEEL BEFORE ME!
BWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!
Eh, just kidding. I haven't seen you in a while, that's all! You really need to be more trusting, sweeeeetheart! I'm just checking in!
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 6:10pm.
Submitted by Dog on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 6:07pm.
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 5:54pm.
Hi Dog, my darling!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
*blank stare*
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Awww, honeeey! I'm not trying to trick you or bait-and-switch, I'm simply saying hello to you!
How have you been, friend?
*understands why Dog would be suspicious*
^^^^^^^^^^^^
*holds hammer behind back just in case*
Um, hi.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 6:17pm.
I know, right? Gotdayum - what a fucking day! I guess it's good that my house didn't burn down. *knocks on wood*
I will have a drink for you, IF!
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
congrats chewin, take your good news where you can get it!
Have a drank for me!
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 6:04pm.
PS - I got hammered that night.
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I have every intention of getting hammered tonight (prolly only a good buzz). This day has SUCKED.
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
Submitted by Dog on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 6:07pm.
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 5:54pm.
Hi Dog, my darling!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
*blank stare*
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Awww, honeeey! I'm not trying to trick you or bait-and-switch, I'm simply saying hello to you!
How have you been, friend?
*understands why Dog would be suspicious*
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 5:56pm.
chewy - Well, I'm glad you are safe for now and have a job. Are you in danger with the wildfires?
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No, I'm not (I live just north of Denver), but I work in Fort Collins, and it is freaking JACKED UP how close this fire is to this city. Fort Collins is where Colorado State University is, and it's about a mile away from the campus. You go outside and it just REEKS like an out of control bonfire. Plus my car is covered in 80 layers of ash. It's very, very sad.
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
Submitted by chewinsmoke on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 5:42pm.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
I need alcohol - STAT!
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LOL!! I'm glad you are still there... ^^I know how you feel. I worked for big corp a long time ago and traveled during the week (my office was at the corp office, tho)... anyhow, got word of big layoffs and cutting expenses (people that traveled were the biggest expense!) and was called in from an audit in the field for a "meeting".... motherfucker, I was on a plane home for 4 hours thinking FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK, just wanting it to be over... I was told I was getting more responsibility and 2 of my co-workers were let go...
PS - I got hammered that night.
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"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 5:54pm.
Hi Dog, my darling!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
*blank stare*
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
chewy - Well, I'm glad you are safe for now and have a job. Are you in danger with the wildfires?
Hi Dog, my darling!
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Dark-sided!
No doubt she looks good for her age but acting like she's twentysomething just makes her look sad and desperate.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
M.E., as far as I know.
But the person who would really be able to tell me what the FUCK is going on had to leave because her house burnt down in this FUCKING WILDFIRE going on.
So...as far as I know, I'm in the clear. For how long, I have NO idea.
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
chewy - so you still haz yob?
UPDATE: B of D's are gone. I'm still here.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
I need alcohol - STAT!
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
Jesus, the more stills I see from Diz and Lick, I think I look more like Liz Taylor than Blohan does.
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"... and her temper worse than wildfire it is gunpowder and blows up everything ..." Mary Shelley
she's the altsex adultfriendfinder s&m version of Sally O'Malley
Submitted by skinny fat on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 5:10pm.
I wonder how her sons feel about mom flashing tits and ass for all the world to see.
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Like she cares about anyone but herself.
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“It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him.” J.R.R. Tolkein
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I wonder how her sons feel about mom flashing tits and ass for all the world to see.
Submitted by WTFOMGLOL on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:49pm.
it's demented and sad..but social .. :)
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LOL!!! "Well, in physics we... we talk about physics, properties of physics..."
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"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by Lisbet459 on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:37pm.
Submitted by WTFOMGLOL on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:31pm.
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Wait, why *does* she do that?
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same reason male dogs will all pee on the same fire hydrant. they leave their calling card for everyone else to come smell. just sayin', hey, I stopped by here today ... my girl thinks that's what I'm doing, so she wants to say, "hey" too ..
it's demented and sad..but social .. :)
Submitted by Lisbet459 on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:36pm.
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LULZ. Even my pre-preg ass couldn't hold a candle to Memaw-donna's, sadly.
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*tosses a bag of hot dicks into Jeanneee's trough* BON APPETIT BITCH! - Raul Duke, 1/26/11
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:35pm.
ATTN: Whamo and other Loon Baiters
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OH indeed thank you Hekki, I think I'll have to let them know. I'll just act as if it's from the New York Times as far as accuracy goes.
I guess she gets a lot of granny comments because she puts herself out there and people gotta knock.
But I for one am grateful to her for being a trail blazer.... I hope I look like her at 50. People live longer nowadays. So grannydom is not 50s anymore... I'm also thankful to JLo.... They both look awesome and are taking the insults, if they even hear them, and are making them so tired that by the time I get to 50, maybe no one will notice... Do your thang, Madge!
My big bitch has an attitude. She gives the side eye. Last time she got pissed she pee'd in the livingroom, right in the middle.
UGH!
Submitted by WTFOMGLOL on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:31pm.
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Wait, why *does* she do that?
@MK - LOL! I already love your abuelita from your description. Great stuff.
Submitted by Jeanneee on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:30pm.
If you took a pic of her ass and a pic of mine and put them side-by-side, then asked people to choose the one that's 20 years older, approximately 0% of people would choose hers. SO DEPRESSING.
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I'm pretty sure that almost ready to pop pregnant ladies aren't allowed in this game.
*blows raspberry and shuns Jeanneee*
She looks good. From certain angles. And out of harsh lights. And with clothes on.
ATTN: Whamo and other Loon Baiters: Just a heads-up that Star Magazine's latest issue grades celeb moms and Angie gets a BAD GRADE. I wonder if JJ will mention it....
heh heh heh.
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:24pm.
chewinsmoke: Don't panic. There's nothing you can do about it - the die is cast, the decision has been made. If you're laid off, you'll probably get some severance and unemployment, right?
I always think getting laid off is better than quitting or being fired for being bad. Everyone's been there. Or someone close to them has been laid off. It's gonna be okay, even if it happens to you.
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Thank you! Everything you said is dead-on, and I'm fairly certain I'll get a decent severance if this does go through. *crosses fingers*
I'm just a little panicked and needed to vent a bit. As usual, you kidz stepped up and helped out.
Beer bongs and blunts for all!
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
Lovin' these dog stories.. (◑‿◐)
mine's a lady, so she doesn't hand out the golden showers ... but if we're on a hike in the middle of the woods, and I have to go .. goddamn if she doesn't wander over and pee right on top where I just went. EVERY. TIME. it's like a social piss/tea party or something. I know why she does it, but it still annoys/amuses me at the same time.
If you took a pic of her ass and a pic of mine and put them side-by-side, then asked people to choose the one that's 20 years older, approximately 0% of people would choose hers. SO DEPRESSING.
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*tosses a bag of hot dicks into Jeanneee's trough* BON APPETIT BITCH! - Raul Duke, 1/26/11
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:03pm.
Hoffer - I used to put bandanas on my sheps... SO CUTE!
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:10pm.
Hoffer - my vet talked me in to shaving my sheps one summer...
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HI DEF PIX PLEASE!!!
(wait, what are "sheps"? Are they something that boys have that girls don't have? *wiggles eyebrows* if not, then don't bother to send the pix)
@Chewinsmoke:
I'm so, so sorry to hear that. That's all I got; I can't think of any advice or anything.
*sends hugs*
Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:17pm.
I had a French guy tell me today that I look like an adolescent Truman Capote. What the fuck?
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It's only an insult to be compared to a later in life Capote. He wasn't bad when he was younger:
http://ventricularprojects.blogspot.ie/2011/07/dressing-like-truman-capo...
http://www.differentscene.co.uk/?p=3421
Maybe he meant you had the sulky, rebellious, "I really am better than y'all", yet slightly delicate and vulnerable look to you. (Plus short hair.)
Or maybe it was a drive-by verbal shanking. Who knows?
Good luck Chewinsmoke! Been there myself, most recently last year.
*crosses fingers for Chewy*
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:15pm.
M.E. - I am. I just don't like felines.
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Who said anything about cats?
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“It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him.” J.R.R. Tolkein
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Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 3:53pm.
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 3:45pm.
Oh my yes, I see this happening. Plus, you couldn't turn the box fan on because her meat curtains would flap in the wind.... mmmmmmm, meaty
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REPORTED! For grossing me out.
chewinsmoke: Don't panic. There's nothing you can do about it - the die is cast, the decision has been made. If you're laid off, you'll probably get some severance and unemployment, right?
I always think getting laid off is better than quitting or being fired for being bad. Everyone's been there. Or someone close to them has been laid off. It's gonna be okay, even if it happens to you.
She needs to value the fans she does have, instead of trying to stay hip and cool. Be like, I dunno, Judy Garland or Mick Jagger and just play the same shows year after year to adoring fans who want to recapture their youth for one night. Embrace the camp/kitch appeal.
What she's doing now is just sad.
I used to take my best friend's puppy to the dog park...he LOVVVVVVVVVVVVED the kiddy pool they set up. Then I got banned because he pooped in it. Stupid dog.
Atleast he was cute.
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Welcome to MelGibsonTown, ya drunk bitch. - Nanners 05/30/2012
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:10pm.
LMAO! What happened to your hair!!!! Hahaha. Awwww poor doggies.
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Welcome to MelGibsonTown, ya drunk bitch. - Nanners 05/30/2012
The veiny arms are disturbing but she's in tip-top shape. I can't hate on that.
lmfao @ Hoffer's R Kelly dog!!
Submitted by WTFOMGLOL on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:17pm.
LMAO, I KNEW I shouldn't have let him watch that show!
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"I didn't know whether to shit or go blind, so I closed one eye and farted"
Hahaha @ the dog stories!! My pooches have air conditioning and their own recliners. Poor things.