Bitch, You So Deep
Pass this to the team of philosophers studying the meaning of the name of our new messiah. After Beyonce and Jay-Z gave their first born the name of the champagne room at The Blue Iguana, theories as to why they gave her that name ranged from, "Hos named her after a tree covered in Smurf jizz" to "Hos are obsessed with the color blue and number 4." There's a new theory out there and this one comes from the mother of the infinite blue light of holiness herself. Beyonce slapped a passage from Rebecca Solnit's "A Field Guide to Getting Lost" onto her Tumblr page and The Atlantic Wire (via Crunk + Disorderly) thinks it unlocks the meaning of Blue Ivy™ Carter's name. I don't know about that, but I do know it will unlock the meaning of the eye roll you're about to make. The Atlantic Wire broke it down for us:
"The world is blue at its edges and in its depths," Solnit writes in the passage Bey posted. "This blue is the light that got lost."
It's the opening to "The Blue of Distance," the second chapter. If Beyoncé read past the opening passage, then she understands the depth behind the chapter's name.
Solnit sees value in cherishing the desire she associates with the color, instead of treating desire as "a problem to be solved." Or in other words, looking into the "blue of distance" without wanting the distance to go away.
File that under: Beyonce Has Had WAY Too Much GOOP In Her Life. But seriously, Beyonce probably just Googled "Blue" and "deep shit" and after that passage came up, she threw it on her Tumblr page to give bitches something to blog about. And I fell for it.
Beyonce can try to throw us off the trail all she wants, but we all know she either named Periwinkle Fern after the belly rash she got from wearing that pillow all those months or after the secret password needed to get into the Illuminati's lair. You tried it, Bey.


Maybe they just liked the name Blue.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Submitted by lovelylaney on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 1:00am.
When I say it would be cool if all black americans could have their DNA traced back to find out where they come from in Africa, it's not "white guilt." As i mentioned, a lot of americans (period) don't know where they came from, but black people whose ancestors came here as slaves that were forcibly taken don't have any idea where they came fr4om without DNA. Many white people came here as indentured servants (let's say "slave"), but they did know their origins.
i could go down "white guilt" way in other ways, but my DNA thing is altogether different, i think.
and yes, i'm not kidding--you, me, everyone--we all came from africa IN THE BEGINNING. There is some great research on this in the Smithsonian mag., Nat. Geo., etc. Way way past 1600 of course. i'm talking origin of our hominid species.
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
@LuciferSam - LOL I am hardly privileged and you don't know me to make such a statement. But it's all good.
Perhaps the American foundational doucments are incorrect in stating all (wo)men are created equal when we know damn well we're not.
Submitted by lovelylaney on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 11:10am.
@LuciferSam - I have to deal with male white corporate oppression on a daily basis and so do most people - male or female and it sucks that the white man has more opportunity.
I'm sure there are a lot of non-white people who'd love to get to a position in their careers where all they have to worry about is "corporate oppression" from the white man, not racist oppression as well. You are hardly some poor victim.
You are privileged. You don't know what non-white people struggle with trying to succeed so it was extremely narrow-minded of you to suggest that the reason they find themselves discriminated against is because they are the ones holding themselves down.
@LuciferSam - I have to deal with male white corporate oppression on a daily basis and so do most people - male or female and it sucks that the white man has more opportunity. And I say WHITE MAN. It's not selfish if I feel no guilt about slavery or the holocaust for that matter. And anyone born after, say 1950, shouldn't have any guilt about any of that shit either. It's guilt I'm talking about, not sensitivity.
Submitted by lovelylaney on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 1:00am.
My honest feeling is that the person is the one who holds himself down. If you want something bad enough, you'll get it.
You may not have "white guilt" but you certainly are deluded if you think that every race has equal opportunities as white people to succeed in white-owned society. If they did there wouldn't be huge differences in wealth among the races. It's easy for you to say, because you have "white privilege" and therefore can't spend an ounce of energy giving a fuck about the real problems of anyone who doesn't look like you.
ETA - White people exploited all races at some point in time, and left them with nothing; so, no, it's not too much to ask that you try not to be so fucking selfish and have *some* sensitivity whether it was 200 years ago with slavery or 70 years ago with the Holocaust.
Dopo la seconda guerra mondiale, Gucci outlet a causa della mancanza di cuoio e altre materie prime su tela? Alternative. Le lettere del libro stampato in coppie logo G e accattivante rosso e gucci verdesimbolo appare in tutti i tipi di tela, borse portadocumenti, portafogli e altri prodotti Gucci. Ottima l'industria bagaglio Gucci si è sviluppato in Louis Vuitton e il francese (Louis - Vuitton) brand famoso. Anche diventare l'oggetto di altri produttori in tutto il mondo copiati, imitati. Con la crescente gamma di prodotti in un decennio o due dopo i primi anni, la Firenze-based Gucci rapida crescita, lo sviluppo di un gruppo internazionale con filiali in tutto il mondo, il prodotto in tutta Europa, America e Asia. Non solo scarpe popolari, borse, scatole, ecc, così come abbigliamento, profumi, articoli per la casa, sciarpe e altri accessori. Si può dire che è proprio a causa di queste specie continuano ad ampliare e sviluppare in una certa misura, migliorare la visibilità del marchio Gucci borse , non è più limitata alle aree di mercato esistenti, e sempre più diventare oggetto di attenzione del brand. A causa del gran numero di prodotti contraffatti e l'imitazione appare, il marchio Gucci ha dovuto spendere un sacco di risorse finanziarie, materiali e la sua lotta per mantenere la sua buona immagine aziendale. In effetti, gli anni di produzione e di funzionamento, Gucci ha avuto alcuni prodotti iconici classici come scarpe basse e dorati ornamenti che non cambieranno mai la tradizione Gucci di prodotti della concorrenza, è anche il tipo di Gucci pizzo scarpe con la suola bassa, aveva i suoi enormi profitti commerciali. Outlet gucci borse pelletteria, in particolare, concia, cuoio e prodotti cinghiale bello vedere le caratteristiche. Dawn Mello (Don - Merlot) nel 1989 fu nominato vice presidente e guida creativa, in modo che il simbolo della gloria del marchio di lusso ieri a diventare un "must" di moda. 1994, Tom Ford (Tom - Ford) aspetto Gucci.
What a fake stupid pretentious EMPTY HEADED sounding bitch.
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Beyonce is just as much ghetto trash as her sister, she just knows how to hide it better.
Barbado Slim 2008
Beyonce is as deep as a puddle.
@agirl- thanks for the explanation.
I used to have a really cool colleague from Haiti, and another one from an island (can't remember which) and they did allude that they were not "angry". In fact, I've had other colleagues from Jamaica who feel the same way. I know in general, people from the islands, no matter their ethnicity, are much more laid back.
However, I feel some of that anger is justified.
Submitted by dlaugher on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 8:19pm.
if it makes anyone feel better, if i'm given forms to fill out that ask for ethnicity (and don't have a "white" or "caucasian" box, i write "Euro-American."
I am first generation. My husband is third/fourth.
personally, i think we should stop spending money in afghanistan and take one percent of it to spend on those cool DNA kits that trace your lineage all the way back. (spoiler: we are *all* from africa!) lots of american "mutts" don't know where they are from.
really, i've always felt the u.s. should pay for any black american to trace their roots to find out where in africa they came from. it's the absolute least we could do after our slave history.
*ducks*
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Ok, I'll throw the shoe. What you said is known as "white guilt". And if you're first generation here in the states, like I am, you shouldn't have it. I know I don't. I can trace every member of both sides of my family to the US and it was way after slavery and early into the 20th century. I also know both sides of my family never owned slaves in Europe or anywhere else so not to be insensitive, I just don't identify with this white guilt I hear all the time about reparations this and reparations that. My honest feeling is that the person is the one who holds himself down. This white guilt to me is akin to all of the current generation of Germans still feeling guilty for the holocaust.
If you want something bad enough, you'll get it. And I highly doubt any of my ancient ancestors that I cannot trace before the 1600s were from Africa. But hey, you never know. :) Said with peace, love, and understanding a la Elvis Costello.
Personally, I prefer African-American as "Black" covers the gamut of the Africa and the African diaspora. I prefer to immediately identify as a member of a more specific ethnic group (with a shared history, etc.) rather than as a member of a large and socially constructed racial group. Plus, identifying as a color always bothered me. Most "Black" people (at least in the States) aren't black or even dark enough to be considered close to it.
I also hate to use White. European-American reinforces the idea that "ethnic" doesn't mean all non-"White" people. We are all ethnic.
PS- I love dlaugher's idea. I would love to find out where the hell my family is from. According to ancestry.com, my mother's family is very distantly related to the Kennedys thanks to a bunch of Irish people.
Back to the shallow end of the pool:
The jury has decided that due to all the evidence, Beyonce and Jay Z are guilty of baby forgery. We all know that baby did not come from Bouncy's loins.
shut the FUCK UP BEYONCE.
"i'm a peaceful guy with bad intentions"
charlie sheen
Submitted by justincase on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 8:31pm.
We no longer refer to Asians as "yellow" nor Native Americans as "red" so why do we still use "white" and "black" for European and African? It strikes me as a blind spot in our cultural expression. Why are only certain groups of people described by the colour of their skin while others are known continentally?
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omigod. my son was in a spring show last week and they sang a song about all the different people and yes, they did say YELLOW. I think the colors were black, white, yellow and brown. i was wondering why yellow was ok.
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
well, it's a stupid name, imo, but i expected nothing less from beyonce. she can barely construct a sentence without sounding retarded.
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"I felt very still & very empty, the way the eye of a tornado must feel, moving dully along in the middle of the surrounding hullabaloo."
That poem ... meh, could have done without knowing 'why' she named her child what she did. I mean, who really cares??? With that said, I think Blue Ivy is a pretty name. But that's as far as I'll go. I wonder if maybe her STANS hounded her facebook and twitter demanding an explanation as to the name of the child.
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"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe." — Albert Einstein
We no longer refer to Asians as "yellow" nor Native Americans as "red" so why do we still use "white" and "black" for European and African? It strikes me as a blind spot in our cultural expression. Why are only certain groups of people described by the colour of their skin while others are known continentally?
Shaddap fool.
if it makes anyone feel better, if i'm given forms to fill out that ask for ethnicity (and don't have a "white" or "caucasian" box, i write "Euro-American."
I am first generation. My husband is third/fourth.
personally, i think we should stop spending money in afghanistan and take one percent of it to spend on those cool DNA kits that trace your lineage all the way back. (spoiler: we are *all* from africa!) lots of american "mutts" don't know where they are from.
really, i've always felt the u.s. should pay for any black american to trace their roots to find out where in africa they came from. it's the absolute least we could do after our slave history.
*ducks*
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
Submitted by lislop on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:19pm.
Ok, I hope this isn't offensive, but how do "black" or " african-americans" like to be referred? Which one? I thought black was the correct one, but now I'm not sure.
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For the record, "African-American" is sometimes just not accurate...
I had a roommate in college who was from Jamaica. She did not want to be referred to as "African-American" because, as she put it, "I am not African OR American."
"Black" would not have offended her, but she did not feel she was part of that group either. She said she felt that American blacks were very angry and expected/pressured her to be angry, and she just did not feel that way or want become angry at someone else's request. But that's a discussion for another day.
for the record, i prefer black over african america...and now that i've been out of the country, i am refered to as american which is what i also prefer...thankyouverymuch...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
*butting in*
I say Black. I am White. Simplest way, IMO.
Personally, I find "African-American" too unwieldy and like others have mentioned, unless I KNOW which African nation they come from, it's not correct. But I don't think it's the wrong thing to say, really.
If someone tells me they are offended by my choice of words, I will gladly and humbly apologize. Although I think people can generally tell whether a person is being a racist dick or if they're incorrect but well-meaning.
Being humble is an important quality to possess and i resent it when nuveau rich assholes like Beyonce and Jay Z think they are more important human beings and their seed and breed superior to anyone else's because they have more money. I mean really...copyrighting the name of your child and pretending your uterus and corresponding vagina are gold gilded and diamond encrusted when in reality you did what millions of animals do each day - including roaches and dung beetles: i.e. give birth and while the only thing that sets you apart from other humans is that you have money. That's all. What these two are doing, including renting out an entire wing of a hospital - is tacky. Celebs these days have a huge sense of entitlement and are supremely narcissitic - sort of like pimps that carry their gold watches and necklaces and rings around on display to make sure everyone knows they have money. Only cheap, class-less people display wealth in such an obscene manner.
Beyonce and Jay Z are musicians who got lucky. Had they not gotten their break, like so many musicians, she'd be stocking shelves at Wal Mart and he'd be holding up convenience stores for diapers and cash. Assholes.
..
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"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:31pm.
* here's one of my complaints about "Af-Amer" -- we don't call white people "European-Americans" --they're Italian-American, Polish-American, Greek-American, etc. if you want to connect me with my African past, then don't be lazy about it -- you make the effort to figure out who's Nigerian/Morrocan-American, who's Botswannian/Egyptian-American, etc. rather than using some "whatever, all those people in Africa is the same" hybrid label
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Not disagreeing with you, but I get the impression that the hyphenated-American is a generational thing, at least among white people of European ancestry. IMO, if you're third or fourth generation American, that makes you "American," not "[insert nationality here]-American."
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"You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."
- Yogi Berra
Thanks. That was helpful. No, I would never use the n word. It's just not a part of my vocabulary, even when someone makes me angry and I want to lash out.
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:31pm.
Fair enough, but I'd best brush up on my geography skills then.
Thanks for explaining.
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Who are you calling silly cow?
Mickey,
sorry, i don't mean to ignore any further direct questions but i'm in the middle of my workday and gotta get back to it. thanks for asking me my opinion, and thanks for caring about this topic
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:18pm
ya know, it's a matter of personal preference -- there is no race consensus on this. or anything else. i think while i was still just lurking you asked a question like "what do Af-Amers" think about X" and people gave you pretty much the same response.
i don't like "Af-Amer" for a lot of reasons,* so i prefer to use Black. but i know lots of lots of Blacks who call themselves Af-Amer. also know some who only refer to themselves as "the N word" and only see it as disparaging when someone of another race uses it. like i said, matter of individual preference
* here's one of my complaints about "Af-Amer" -- we don't call white people "European-Americans" --they're Italian-American, Polish-American, Greek-American, etc. if you want to connect me with my African past, then don't be lazy about it -- you make the effort to figure out who's Nigerian/Morrocan-American, who's Botswannian/Egyptian-American, etc. rather than using some "whatever, all those people in Africa is the same" hybrid label
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Beyonce wouldn't know what being deep was if she rode the Mariana Trench in a submarine.
Ok, I hope this isn't offensive, but how do "black" or " african-americans" like to be referred? Which one? I thought black was the correct one, but now I'm not sure.
For future reference, Foxxy, what would be the correct term to use? Excuse my ignorance, but political correctness isn't big in the Netherlands. Compared to you Americans we are all rather blunt. The upside is that you don't have to worry all the time about offending people.
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Who are you calling silly cow?
She just took the name from The Book of Iluminatti.
I truly believe that you haven't begun to scoop up all of life's beautiful moments until you've heard the line "Watch the wig!" from a piece while sitting on their face. - MK
Submitted by Doll-Parts on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 3:59pm.
and "Blue Ivy" will make a great name for her fried chicken franchise!
/have been rolling my eyes and smh for the past hour or so
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 4:00pm.
I ♥ you too
where is the number 4 in ivy? i don't get the connection.
as for blue, i knew a guy named blue. i think that's a great name.
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
Submitted by Doll-Parts on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 3:59pm.
I'm positive Blue can tap-dance, so relaaaax....
A+
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 3:56pm.
LOL @ people having to explain why a baby born to two black parents isn't charcoal coloured and doesn't have a massive afro. Never change, Dlisted.
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHA! You're my favorite :)
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Douchechill!
her boobs are too deflated to have been pregnancy boobs...I wish she would come clean about the fake pregnancy and stop blowing so much smoke up our asses...I am rolling my eyes right out of their sockets on this one...she truly sucks...she can take Goopy and her funny faced husband and go fuck off (take Gayfish and his fat assed heifer too)
"LOL @ people having to explain why a baby born to two black parents isn't charcoal coloured and doesn't have a massive afro. Never change, Dlisted."
THIS!!! But I'm positive Blue can tap-dance, so relaaaax....
I am...doll parts...bad skin...doll heart.
LOL @ people having to explain why a baby born to two black parents isn't charcoal coloured and doesn't have a massive afro. Never change, Dlisted.
Mrs. Carter can read? This ho has entirely to much time on her hands...
After reading this, I'm so glad my funky ass name actually has some meaning that my folks can actually explain.
Jay and B are so superficial, they probably never even picked up a book.
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"What is the Yiddish word for puto estúpido, because that's what he really is" - MK
The color difference can happen in white families too.
I have a friend with 3 kids. The first two are very fair skinned with light hair. The last is very olive skin colored with darker hair. They ALL favor their dad's face so there was no mating with the milkman.
I agree with the bio child/surrogate theory. If that bitch had birthed a kid, she would be as big as a house.
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 2:31pm.
"African-American" [i HATE that term] covers all types of African peoples, and produces all kinds of different colored babies with all kinds of different facial features and hair. You can't just look at the parents and grandparents -- you have to consider the multi-generational mix.
dtquoi, you made my day. My second favorite Damon character after Homey, and i almost forgot about him :-)
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
little Blivey's hand's throwing down the "peace out, motherfucker" sign.
She looks like a miniature Jay-Z. that's unfortunate.
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OF COURSE SHE GOOGLED IT! lololol ;)
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by TiredofthisCrap on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 2:30pm.
PS many black babies are fair skinned when they first come out. She'll darken up soon.
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She'll be so dark soon they'll have to bring her through the servant's entrance.
Wha wha what, who said that!!!
da fuck did i just read??
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"It's called a party bus! Not a punch-a-titty bus. And put your MetroCard away, Chris Brown, no such bus exists." MK
Take your child, your husband...don't forget your pillow, and kindly FUCK OFF.