The World Almost Lost England's Finest Rose
Now you know that if Mr. Hankey and Red Sonja consummated their union on a mountain of HGH syringes, their love child would be the most naturally beautiful thing to ever scoot across your eyes. And to think, this thing of beauty might not have ever existed. Thinking about a world without bodybuilding Jodie Marsh is like thinking about a world without anti-chafing gel. Let's not think of that world.
England's Finest Rose tells The Sun that the world of bodybuilding saved her life and gave her a reason to go on. Before Jodie kept the muscles in her body muscly by downing 21 egg whites, brown rice and protein shakes a day (that really is her daily diet), she was on the verge of ending it all. Jodie couldn't take assholes using, cheating, beating her and not treating her like the polished crown jewel she is. Jodie was already on the floor from being treated like shit by boyfriends, and beauty-hating minions of Hell kicked her while she was down. Jodie says that after she was evicted from the Celebrity Big Brother house in 2006, nasty whores treated her like trash and drove her to almost driving her truck into the Grim Reaper's open arms:
“About six months after Celebrity Big Brother I decided I was going to kill myself. The quickest way to do it was to drive my truck into a post, so I started working out which one to use and how fast I’d need to be going. I was sick of everyone being so horrible to me. I’d walk down the road and people would say, ‘You’ve got a dodgy nose, you’ve got saggy tits’ and they’d think that was fine. If I didn’t respond, they’d throw something at me — usually a bottle or drinks can. I just got worn down by it. All I could think about was that I needed to drive myself into one of these poles. But I didn’t do it. I got to the pub sobbing. I was having a meltdown.”
Like bronzed, muscled Phoenix with a six-pack on its anus lips, she rose from the ashes of hate and is now more confident than ever:
“I can honestly say these are the best years of my life. I can’t even describe how good it is just to finally feel like I am doing something positive. I’ve always wanted to do something good but people would never take me seriously. Now they are. I feel so fit and healthy and ripped and strong. It’s so good to put the bad times behind me.”
Jodie has won a few championships in the UK and recently won a world championship in DC.
Thank God, Jesus and Bea Arthur that those funny donut looking things people pickup at gyms exist, because if they didn't the world might've lost Jodie Marsh. If we lost Jodie Marsh, every drop of silicone would dry up, roses would never grown again, elegance wouldn't have a name anymore, genitals would never get up in the morning and the British ho stroll would no longer be as naturally beautiful. Worst world ever.
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A body type like hers looks repulsive on a woman.
anabolic steroids
A body type like hers looks repulsive on a woman.
anabolic steroids
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Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Tue, 06/12/2012 - 6:30pm.
I know some women who are huge into fitness training and I have to say, it's exhausting seeing people so self absorbed and into their bodies.
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well considering its rammed into womens minds from a really young age that their appearence is everything can you be surprised? i think its unfair to blame them when they are a symptom rather than the root of the disease(that would be culture)-i mean, look how much shit women get in the press when they dont look like perfect photoshopped models. women cant win either way.
Good call topanga
I got 3 words for that skintone:
anal creampie bukkake
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Do you want a banana?
No i don't wanna
Its great she is happy, its seems to have made her less abrasive on the ear (if not the eye).
What amazes me is that people win awards for looking like that, positive awards i mean not like 'Razzies' for the body.
Ok, when you go out looking as she has in the past, with a skinny leather belt as a top over beach ball boobs, etc. it's a tough ask to be taken seriously. But it's one thing to sit behind a laptop and make fun, and another to chuck a bottle at her in the street which would be awful. She's obviously had issues trying to outskank Jordan and duplicate her career, but I'm glad to see she's doing something constructive and rewarding with her life, even if it does involve looking like she's a victim of the Exxon Valdez. At least it's honest.
She's not as muscular as she seems, so while her look is not my cup of tea (the implants, excessive make-up and sleeve tattoo) if this helps her feel better, then more power to her. Although, to go from drunk ho to suddenly this excessively healthy eater/work out nut, doesnt seem normal.
Submitted by Datura on Wed, 05/30/2012 - 10:59am.
I was a skinny, pink preemie. I looked like an earthworm until I was two months old.
I love your site but this was misjudged I lost a friend to suicide and it still hurts after 12 years. I never had any time for her before now but my hat off to her for pulling through.
Everyone keeps saying steroids- she won a NATURAL bodybuilding contest. Of course that doesn't apply to the titty sacks, but she's not alone with those in the muscle world.
Good for her, hope she is happy.
...............................
Worrying is using your imagination
to create something you don’t want.
WHO the FUCK would want to be a Jordan rip-off??? She lookes like a roided out oompaloompa! Seek help, wash that shit off and get a real job, ho.
England's finest rose, did not bring her best tuck game... no.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I see those before and after pics in fitness magazines advertising a fat burner or some other body building enhancement supplement and I always think the women look better before even if they are a little more "squishy" I think women look better with softness and some curves.
As incredible as it may sound, there are some guys who are into that female bodybuilding shit... Big time aficionados who are willing to pay the big bucks to be with those "girls."
In fact, this is how many of them earn a living.
Personally, I think all that muscle looks ridiculous on a guy, let alone on a woman.
Pete Burns was a total asshole to Jodie.
The British are notoriously rotten to B/C/D listed stars, they shove them, push them, have physical altercations with them and verbally abuse them terribly. So I believe Jodie.
I also think Jodie has Body Dysmorphic Disorder and a plethora of other mental illnesses. She was a nasty Jordan wannabe but she clearly isn't right in the head so I feel kind of sorry for her.
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Dark-sided!
Jodie is just as much of a mess as liil Kim...both are hard to look at and both make my skin crawl...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Depression is the freight train to hell. I'm glad she found focus.
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"Being a fucking idiot is a valuable commodity in this culture because you're rewarded significantly." ~~ Jon Hamm
Ok Jodie, if you say so, BEST YEARS of your LIFE, okay. o_O If she feels good great but man is that BIZARRE! lo
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦≈♠░░░░
Good for her! I hate to hear that Pete Burns was bullying her....(really?). I would rip on him, but that would be bullying so....hope she is not using steroids or that would aggravate depression.
Poor old Jodie, she's as mad as a box of frogs.
"No matter how cynical you become, it's impossible to keep up." - Lily Tomlin
She's doing too much.
A body type like hers looks repulsive on a woman. Are there men out there who actually find that attractive?
http://the80srevisited.blogspot.com/
No Beaver, she is a natural woman. You must be a newbie to this site if you think she is hiding a penis.
I just think it's too bad that while she did this body-building for herself, she didn't think to do something for some one else. She has always done things for herself.
I know jack shit about this girl. That said, what she said about hitting a pole sounded genuine and non-attention seeking. I think she looks different than I am used to seeing women but if she is happy, good for her.
Okay, the tits are square(ish) and that bikini bottom has GOT to be housing a penis.
I'm out. You guys are on your own with this one.
For some reason, as ridiculous as she looks, I cant hate on this girl. One, because I went through a bad depression back in college and it is the loneliest and darkest place you can ever be. Two, because she channeled her emotions elsewhere and did something postive for herself. Trust me, this woman could be worse off than looking like this. More power to her.
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
Migraineuse: But some women don't buy into the whole appearance thing. Some women don't want to manipulate or attract men. They don't give a shit.
My mom doesn't give two shits. She walks around in denim overalls and T-shirts and Crocs. She has gray hair and wears no makeup or jewelry and men fucking love her. She takes no shit and she's actually a little mean and pushy. They're scared of her. I've never seen her back down to ANY man.
Some of them try to talk down to her but they learn pretty quickly to take her seriously. They might hate her, but they don't mess with her.
What do you think about that? If you don't care what men think -- and she really doesn't -- isn't that when they start to take you seriously? Even if it's as a threat?
Gawd that's awful. Her body looks that hard a cat couldn't scratch it.
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Hekki me too. I saw your comment about her going from one extreme to the other, and yes, spot on. I can't kick an underdog. I hope she finds some SELF validation because people are fickle as hell, and in the end if you have self love, well, you've got this.
Submitted by Sweetas: "Still, I can't help but think it's just a bandaid on a gut shot."
You nailed it in a nutshell, Sweetas.
I hope she finds peace.
Good for her I say.
(I'm in a non-snarky mood today)
As much as I'd love to make some "Pennywise" crack, I just can't. Something is really wrong with this girl. Good for her for finding a purpose instead of resigning herself to the hate. Still, I can't help but think it's just a bandaid on a gut shot. :(
How sad that people treated her like shit to the point that she wanted to kill herself. But good for her for rising above it.
** http://feministguidetohollywood.blogspot.com **
to Tomahawk:
- in the end everybody is annoying.
This is why I hang out with my critters so much, they just worry about who is getting more food, and that really is about it.
Damn, animals are the superior beings no doubt.
I don't care how depressed I ever get in life I will not turn to body building to make me feel better, I think I would be even more depressed and suicidal if I looked like that mess....bring on the damn cheesecake...fuck bodybuilding.
This is why you dont put morons on tv. They get hooked on the attention and come at you harder.
Why do I have a feeling that her sugar walls are lined with sandpaper....and thorns?
I watched every minute of that particular Celebrity Big Brother and, despite the outer appearances, Jodie Marsh was the only sincere, honest, non-fake, non-gameplaying celeb in it. Michael Barrymore,Pete Burns and George Galloway bullied her terribly. The other so-called celebs just stood around and watched it happen. I have a lot of respect for Jodie Marsh ... despite the outer appearances.
(kiss this)--------------------------->>> (_!_)
She looks like the devil...really. Why build up and make your body look like a MAN'S then slap fake tits and the whole Wet n'Wild product line onto your face. Hate stupid bitches like this!
Is that makeup or a real tan? Because if it's real, HOT DAMN that skin is leathery.
Submitted by Migraineuse on Tue, 06/12/2012 - 8:04pm.
Yes, yes, you detest all men and feverishly believe that they're all conspiring to destroy women. We know already.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Women, men hate you.
Marsh isn't the first woman who ever thought that she could lessen her oppression if she'd just practice the beauty rituals a little harder. She doesn't realize the goalposts are forever out of her reach, and even if she had a chance, she'd age out of it.
As someone's sig said: female beauty standards are not about beauty, really. They're about obedience.
Men get to feel superior for not having to do any of this humiliating beauty shit. The whole point of it is to mark women as lesser beings.
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I'm a heretic. Feel free to drive me from your midst.
Submitted by ba-buttons on Tue, 06/12/2012 - 7:18pm.
ba-buttons likes it when sex is a test of stamina
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Mark? Is that you?
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"... and her temper worse than wildfire it is gunpowder and blows up everything ..." Mary Shelley
Her hair color worries me more than anything else about this story. She is an attractive woman. Why cover it up with Manic Panic and brown skin stain?_____________________________________________
What if the hokey pokey really is what it's all about?
She looks fucking amazing. Regardless of what shit anyone wants to talk about her, it takes a LOT of hard work, discipline, and dedication to transform one's body like that, and to maintain it. Lord knows most of our lazy asses could never do it. Props to Jodie for seemingly finding something that finally makes her happy.
Forgot to add those fake titty balls are mighty scary. Seen some scary ones here on the D, but those are the scariest imho.
Submitted by ba-buttons on Tue, 06/12/2012 - 7:18pm.
ba-buttons totally would. She's skanky but super hot.
ba-buttons likes it when sex is a test of stamina
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Would ba-buttons be sober or on some mind altering substance while totally "woulding"? :) haha
All that work and she didn't do a thing to her nose?
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"... and her temper worse than wildfire it is gunpowder and blows up everything ..." Mary Shelley
Wait...what fucking color would one call that? Geez.