Monday, June 11th 2012

Hot Slut Of The Day!

The beyond glamorous kittens and sunshine Walmart sweatsuit Pam wore on last night's season premiere of True Blood. (SLIGHT SPOILER ALERT) Even though last night's episode gave us a nekkid Eric hitting his vampire sister from the back in a storage unit, Steve Newlin's fabulous over-the-shoulder declaration of gay love and a possibly brain dead Tara vampire HULKING out at Sooooookeeeh, the highlight was definitely Pam's beautiful burial ensemble that looked like it came straight out of Weiner Dog's dressser. And just like that, VampiresofWalmart.com was born!

via Tumblr

Posted by: Michael K


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Hockey fan's picture

Submitted by WTFOMGLOL on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 12:08pm.

..but TB is just bloody AWFUL. Awful acting, unwatchable soap opera crap. These are not the Sookie, Bill, Eric, or even Pam, from the books. The casting sucks. Bloody fail all around (sorry, you fans, but I just can't with this crap).

^^^

My GF is totally into it, so I have to watch or leave the room. The acting is atrocious, and other than Sookeh, I've never heard of any of these actors. If I can't get into the characters, I can't get into the story. Asskars is the worst actor ever, and Bill ain't much better. There are too many fucking characters and too many plotlines. When you only spend five minutes on each line, there's no continuity.
I'm just meh about it...and I still mourn the end of the Sopranos.

Hockey fan's picture

That sweatsuit was the shizz. I can't believe they got Kristin Von Bauer Stratten Patten Van Halen to wear it.

Pam was the best part of last night's episode.

I've tried to like Tara over the years. I really have. But all she EVER does is whine about what other people have done to her. Yes, they've done a lot to her, but everyone else on the show has dealt with just as much shit. When she moved away I was hoping that she'd just go back there and try to be happy, but no, she had to come back and whine more and then get into more messes to whine about. It looks like in her present state maybe she'll finally shut the fuck up.

Ms.Fit's picture

Submitted by The Sunshine Gang on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 4:51pm.
My boyfriend has been trying to get me to watch this show for months. I just can't get into it. He also makes fun of me for watching "soaps" like old Dark Shadows, which to me is basically an earlier, tamer version of this show.

===
You are right to ignore his suggestion, because the 1960s Dark Shadows is far better in writing, story and characters than True Blood. And DS recycle their characters so that's saying something.

I just can't with TB anymore. I mean how do you fuck up such an awesome formula? Tara started out smart, now she's... and Eric goes from sexy to emo to just arggh. No more for me.

CandyPerfumeGirl's picture

@Miss Malevolent,

what i like about Tara was that she was portrayed as this vulnerable girl in the beginning with a fucked up past of a drunken mother. I especially liked how she had a crush on Jason and they almost hit it off until the stupid writers abruptly side stepped that part to get into their absurd stupid plot lines that are incoherent and all over the place. Then it was never picked up again so it feels unresolved. I mean Jason doesnt even know she is dead and Sooki and la Fayette actually advocate for her being turned into a vampire? Like that is smething Tara wanted or was desirable? it is like turning someone into a zombie. Who does that? The whole point about Tara was that she had all these demons but also humanity and vulnerability to her. They cant turn her into a fang and think that's cool.

I hope they cancel the show. It is major crap.
..

.

--------
"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity

CandyPerfumeGirl's picture

Seriously, that was the only funny and intelligent sentence uttered in the show.

True Blood has turned really crappy since the last 2 or 3 seasons.

First of all, each "season" is about 10 to 12 episodes long, tops - resulting in a huge gap between seasons. I mean these are amercians we are talking about. Day flies have longer attention spans. From a marketing perspective leaving something like 9 to 10 months between seasons is a bad idea.

The other issue is that the show has significantly departed from its origins and an interesting plot and story lines as well as characters., Ut has morphed into an anthology of inhoerent, unrelated side stories with one dimensional characters eahc having about 3 minutes of screen time.

You cant keep up anymore. I dont even know what this show is supposed to be about, and what Sooki is doing and what Bill's role is and all. wtf.

And let;s not even talk about the stupid dialogues bordering at clownish buffoonery. Everyne says stupid shit and the show seems to be banking on its styled soft core scenes. I mean is it supposed to be shocking that Eric fucks his "sister" against the wall. Whoo hoo..

The show went from intelligent and enticing to mediocre to fucking boring and confusing as hell. The preview also didnt look good. I mean a bunch of incoherent and unrelated story lines and characters. And some story lines remain unresolved and it drags on and on...Bleh. I am so done with this. I think i prefer zombies. They should cancel this crap already. Long overdue.
..

.

-----------
"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity

Miss Malevolent's picture

So glad they didn't kill Tara. I would've probably stopped watching the show if they did.

However, if she's supposed to be that dumb as shit Bubba character...this may be my last season watching.

After listening to color struck racists complaining since season 1 that "She's white in the books" (like that matters) and then saying that the "lighter" Tara would've been a better fit...hopefully now that's she's one of the vampires, those folks can shut up now.

I'd rather they'd kept her human though...but I'll keep an open mind.

The Sunshine Gang's picture

My boyfriend has been trying to get me to watch this show for months. I just can't get into it. He also makes fun of me for watching "soaps" like old Dark Shadows, which to me is basically an earlier, tamer version of this show.

miz cynical's picture

Wow. I didn't realize that so many people dislike Tara!? I like her better than Sookie. Maybe what I like most about her is her awesome arms/biceps. I'm so jealous. I'm all arm jiggle. Here's the order of my fave characters: 1- Pam (she has the best one liners and fashion sense), 2 - Lafayette, and 3 - Tara.

harperharper's picture

Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 12:30pm.

I had to stop watching because most of their attempts at Louisiana accents were godawful.
------------------------
I thought that at first as well - then I
thought- well, maybe that's the way
they talk up in Shreveport - which may as
well be Arkansas as far as I'm concerned.

stefystef's picture

Submitted by Twat Muffin on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 10:32am.
"I'm so over Sookie and her precious fairy vagina and her unbelievably stupid name. Fuck Sookie!"

seriously one of my all time favorite lines.
I agree, Pam is the best!

*****************************************************************

That's one of the best lines EVER!
Pam said it for all of us... FUCK SOOKIE!

______________________________________________________________
Grow up, Demi, and do coke off toilet seats like the rest of us adults do!- Michael K, 1/26/12

mefunigirl's picture

Submitted by Twat Muffin on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 10:32am.
the original -- I loved when she said to Sookeh something about her "super snatch." Pam is the best
......

"I'm so over Sookie and her precious fairy vagina and her unbelievably stupid name. Fuck Sookie!"

seriously one of my all time favorite lines.
I agree, Pam is the best!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz

bloodsicle's picture

They should just make this the Pam and Lafayette show. Jason is entertaining as well.

stefystef's picture

Submitted by Rabdkitty on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 11:03am.
Naked Viking ass! Always yummy.
And the actress who plays Pam is hilarious and brilliant, IMO.
Tara will act even more entitled, Should have stayed gone.
Sookie and Bill can die anytime.
Joe M. (Alcide) still can't act.
And there are still too many damn characters I don't give two shits about.

******************************************************************

Good Lord, is there anyone on the show that you actually LIKE??? *LOL*

______________________________________________________________
Grow up, Demi, and do coke off toilet seats like the rest of us adults do!- Michael K, 1/26/12

WTFOMGLOL's picture

Submitted by Twat Muffin on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 1:19pm.

WTFOMGLOL -- yeah, I guess it is; I realized it after I wrote it. Plus, I hate my brother, too.
=============================

I like it! It belongs on a T-shirt or something LOL.

almost like Haiku. Or Jack Handy. (old SNL)

WithinReason...'s picture

Twatty, Sucky will take care of it. I gave him some special objects to be used *under discretion* to dislodge sticks if necessary! Last I heard, Sucky was off driving erratically heading east! I dunno about the return trip. Could be there were some drugs and a truck stop in there somewhere! No word since! LOLOLOL

I love Pam, even in that outfit! ;)

•-•-•-•-•-•
"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦≈♠░░░░

Twat Muffin's picture

SANS FARDS -- here's Meloni with Miss Piggy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mlyUYNeCVv0

Jeanneee's picture

I gave up on True Blood. It just got too silly. I love high camp as much as the next fag hag, but there is a limit.

Plus the fake accents make me retch, especially Sookie's. That shit could peel paint.

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*tosses a bag of hot dicks into Jeanneee's trough* BON APPETIT BITCH! - Raul Duke, 1/26/11

Gardening Girl's picture

Sans Fards, you weren't skeeved out with his affection for the canned veg? :O

Twat Muffin's picture

SANS FARDS -- oh, yes, Meloni is very funny. He's hysterical in "Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle"; unfortunately, his appearance is quite unsightly in that movie (you'd have to see the movie to understand). Knowing that he can be funny makes him even sexier to me; I love a man that can make me laugh. I saw a sketch of him with Miss Piggy and they were adorable together; Miss Piggy ended up tying him up with crime scene tape, something I would totally do, too.

Twat Muffin's picture

Within -- hey, babe! I'm only going to mention this once for fear of some bitch getting up in my ass, but did you see Roger's magnificent naked ass last night? We'll talk later in OP!

*Twat fanning herself off*

SANS FARDS's picture

@TwatMuffin, I watched Wet Hot American Summer for the first time the other day and saw yer man in it. He is hilarious! I had no idea Meloni could be...well...funny, because he does such a good job playing Elliott Stabler who I think has cracked 1 joke in 10 seasons of SVU. But he (and that movie) are awesome.

_______________________________________________

"You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."

- Yogi Berra

Sharon's picture

Thanks to Pam, Fuctarded is my new favorite word.

And they need to bring Meloni on like donkey kong.

-----------------------------------------------
"Fur Protestor: Do you know how many poor animals they had to kill to make that coat?

Margo Brofman: Know how many rich animals I had to fuck to get this coat?" Switch (1991)

WithinReason...'s picture

Twatty, I am sorry there was no Meloni manwich for you yesterday! They dangle the goods and fail to deliver #bummed ;(

Hope they don't leave him to the last episode or... MURRRDERRRR! Lolololol

•-•-•-•-•-•
"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦≈♠░░░░

char's picture

Love Pam!!!!

______________________________________________
I'm countin' on Jesus at this point.

Twat Muffin's picture

WTFOMGLOL -- yeah, I guess it is; I realized it after I wrote it. Plus, I hate my brother, too.

Bunnyman -- I could have done without Steve Newlin. I could honestly do without Jason; he's so stupid and gets on my nerves. Jessica could do so much better than him. Eric has the most beautiful body. Bill & Sookeh could just go up in a cloud of smoke for all I care.

Rabdkitty -- WTF is up with Joe Manjello? Dude cannot act his way out of a paper bag!

And no Meloni last night -- I was so pissed.

ILovePapaSmurf's picture

"Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 10:22am.

Tara's still around? FUCK! I literally jumped up and cheered when she got shot. I like the character in the books, but, fuck, that bitch that plays her can't act for shit."

She is one of the weakest characters on the show and it sucks because she could be such a bad ass. Hopefully Vampire Tara won't let me down, but if she does, please put a stake through her heart, Alan. I beg you!
--------------------------------------
"Submitted by suckandfuck on Fri, 04/16/2010 - 5:46pm.

I would slaughter a thousand babies for an hour alone with Mike Rowe."

Bunnyman's picture

Pam in the Walmart sweatsuit was hilarious. She's the best thing on TB.

I still watch TB because it's generally batshit crazy and good for a chuckle or two, although the Steve Newlin return is gonna grate on my nerves big time. It's cheap, harmless fun, not Masterpiece Theatre.

And horz: If you haven't watched TB in x number of seasons don't write in and say how much it sucks. You don't know. It's like if you don't bother to vote you can't bitch about the government. Same thing.

WithinReason...'s picture

DWM, they can bring her back though. It's fantasy, not reality... Sheesh! Lololol ;p

They keep killing off the interesting characters. Seriously, WTF?

•-•-•-•-•-•
"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦≈♠░░░░

The season with the witches was fucking stupid, looked more like Buffy than True Blood. This one had better be an improvement or were done professionally.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"It's always funny until somebody gets hurt-then it's fucking hilarious": The late great Bill Hicks

DirtyWhoreMouth's picture

Submitted by WithinReason... on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 12:38pm.
Vampiresofwalmart.com? hahahaha MK! Why must they do that to Pam? Why??! Sookie and Bill must be conspiring against that hot piece! And where's Evan Rachel Wood?

------------------------------

Girl she's dead. Bitch. Boom. Bye.
______________________________________________

How can a man be a mom?

*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-

WithinReason...'s picture

Vampiresofwalmart.com? hahahaha MK! Why must they do that to Pam? Why??! Sookie and Bill must be conspiring against that hot piece! And where's Evan Rachel Wood? She was better than Sook!! Yeah, the plot's convoluted but there are beautiful vampires and weres - so we put up! Thanks for the spoiler warning MK, had to read on anyway... *grumbles*! ;)

•-•-•-•-•-•
"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦≈♠░░░░

DirtyWhoreMouth's picture

I love it. I can't decide who I love more... Pam or Lafayette.

______________________________________________

How can a man be a mom?

*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-

MissJaneTexas's picture

I had to stop watching because most of their attempts at Louisiana accents were godawful. Rode my nerves.

**************************************************************

Welcome to MelGibsonTown, ya drunk bitch. - Nanners 05/30/2012

parissucksliterally's picture

I quit this show 3 seasons ago.

**********************************************
Please forgive me for my sins,
Yes I swam dirty waters, but you pushed me in
- Adele

letinstar's picture

i LOVED tb in the beginning...i'm bored with it now...

however, i do love pam...
_____________________________________________
"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr

sinjin's picture

Submitted by babybunny:
.... but Lafayette, Pam and Askars and his sexy ass will keep me watching,also Jessica cause she is breathtaking
----------------------------------------------
THIS! I was glad they Sookeh killed that blonde trash though. I hope they don't bring back that po trash Crystal (Meth) jaguar chick either.

SANS FARDS's picture

Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 10:22am.

Tara's still around? FUCK! I literally jumped up and cheered when she got shot. I like the character in the books, but, fuck, that bitch that plays her can't act for shit.

__________________________________________

I only watched one season of this show but she annoyed the hell out of me, too.

_______________________________________________

"You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."

- Yogi Berra

WTFOMGLOL's picture

Submitted by TexnDoc on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 12:02pm.

I don't watch this. I think if you're over 30 you're not allowed to.
=================

I wanted to like this show. I really did. I've read 10 of the books already, and they are all really good. (I do agree with the general concensus, though, it's time to put the series to rest).

..but TB is just bloody AWFUL. Awful acting, unwatchable soap opera crap. These are not the Sookie, Bill, Eric, or even Pam, from the books. The casting sucks. Bloody fail all around (sorry, you fans, but I just can't with this crap).

WTFOMGLOL's picture

Submitted by Twat Muffin on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 10:59am.

Though I love kittens, I hate kittens on sweatshirts. That shit is something my sister-in-law would wear. I hate my sister-in-law.
==============================

there's something very zen and circular about that statement.

TexnDoc's picture

I don't watch this. I think if you're over 30 you're not allowed to.

Vern's picture

Is that Pam NYLAND?

*chanting as always*

Shut the fuck up kid, you're in my closet now.

babybunny's picture

getting a little weary of tb, but Lafayette, Pam and Askars and his sexy ass will keep me watching,also Jessica cause she is breathtaking.

crazyinjapan's picture

My great-grandma (bless her soul, sweet lady) had a whole collection of sweatsuits with kittens and puppies on them in the 1980s. She couldn't help it; she was in her 90s. I still see people wearing shit like this. Who in their right mind would think this is appropriate or attractive? If I had a five-year old daughter, I wouldn't even let her wear something like this. So tacky.

Rabdkitty's picture

Naked Viking ass! Always yummy.
And the actress who plays Pam is hilarious and brilliant, IMO.
Tara will act even more entitled, Should have stayed gone.
Sookie and Bill can die anytime.
Joe M. (Alcide) still can't act.
And there are still too many damn characters I don't give two shits about.

Twat Muffin's picture

Though I love kittens, I hate kittens on sweatshirts. That shit is something my sister-in-law would wear. I hate my sister-in-law.

Twat Muffin's picture

the original -- I loved when she said to Sookeh something about her "super snatch." Pam is the best. I was pissed there was no Meloni on last night's episode, though. And is Bill dyeing his hair black or what?

jack-n-the-hat's picture

Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on Mon, 06/11/2012 - 10:22am.

that bitch that plays her can't act for shit.
--------------------

I cringe when she comes on the screen... I can't stand her ass.
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"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers