Cheryl Cole's Vocal Cords Were Singed By Prince Hot Ginge's Presence, Obviously
Above is a video from The Queen's Diamond Jubilee concert of Gary Barlow and Cheryl Cole kicking, choking, stabbing, murdering, skinning and eating the face off of Lady Cerebellumorwhatever's "Need You Now." If a pile of shit could sing, it would sound like that video. If you're looking for the perfect way to say "I hate you" to your ears, just press play on that mess. Cheryl's vocal cords sound like they're hungover and sad. But in Cheryl's defense, she was talking to Prince Hot Ginge backstage.
The Daily Mail says that Cheryl and PHG got close and talked for a long time before exchanging numbers. If you were standing in front of PHG, your vocal cords would start tingling, your tonsils would swell up (because the tonsils are the clit of the mouth...why did I type that?) and you'd have to use all your strength on keeping your jaw shut since it naturally wants to open when in front of his royal ginger hotness. So this time, Cheryl has a valid excuse for sounding like a deaf, drunk walrus doing bad karaoke.
And more importantly, why in the Hell are they singing that song for The Queen? I bet when 1:15 rolled around the next morning, The Queen was really disappointed that neither Gary Barlow nor Cheryl Cole drunk dialed her ass.
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This racist bitch is absolutely awful and yet she has fans. Yes she is racist, don't believe her sham marriage to Ashley who was indeed biracial. I wouldn't even call her the British J.Lo because as much as J.Lo can't sing she actually had decent songs. Cheryl on the other-hand not so much.
Talentless racist chav scum bitch. Look at this - http://www.casttv.com/video/sn1a6j1/cheryl-cole-auto-tune-fail-video
And can you believe performances like this on a reality TV supposed singing talent show got her into Girl Aloud - http://youtu.be/xkp-bvxeGqw
Though at least 3 girls all sounded terrible. The ginge had one of the better voices but she's always called the ugly one.
Still, with pop genius like this - http://youtu.be/Wy3SV2fvoG8 - who cares if they can sing! Pop music was never about that. But she IS awful, an English J-Lo basically, but she succeeded where her poor WAG idol Posh failed, the only Spice never to have a #1, she gave up.
I felt embarrassed for Gary Barlow during this entire performance.
What's with the tv karaoke contest washups - couldn't they afford, like, actual singers?
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Do you want a banana?
No i don't wanna
Submitted by sushi on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:42pm.
Wasn't her ex black though?
That's standard damage control for reality TV racists - see also Danielle Lloyd.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 3:44pm.
No idea why anyone likes this talentless thug.
'Nation's Sweetheart' doncha know.
Along with Jade Goody. Where am I when the votes are taken for this illustrious position? I wouldn't vote for either of these useless thugs.
Submitted by clairey claire on Fri, 06/08/2012 - 5:30am.
Very eloquent article that shows the true Cheryl, before her huge PR machine really kicked in. Sweet is not a word I would use
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/comment/personal-view/3598357/Youre-not-a-rac...
I had forgotten quite how bad that incident was, thanks for the link. Did she ever release a public apology or anything? I'd bet my granny that they paid the poor toilet attendant off...
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Certified Slore
Very eloquent article that shows the true Cheryl, before her huge PR machine really kicked in. Sweet is not a word I would use
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/comment/personal-view/3598357/Youre-not-a-rac...
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"It's always funny until somebody gets hurt-then it's fucking hilarious": The late great Bill Hicks
I do love Cheryl Cole. I think she's sweet and gorgeous. But, she sucks at singing live! :(
I had never heard her sing. She is awful! Why cover a song performed by singers that can actually sing well? AND choose to perform alongside a singer who's far superior?
Submitted by Datura on Wed, 05/30/2012 - 10:59am.
I was a skinny, pink preemie. I looked like an earthworm until I was two months old.
The poster formerly known as Snow Owl formerly known as Nightowl, is ready to PARTAY!!!
I've always had a soft spot for Cheryl Cole but this was awful. The only other performance i've seen of this concert was Ed Sheeran and that was pretty good.
Submitted by sushi on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 9:17pm.
Why does hitting a black woman = racist? Was the hit was racially motivated?
clairey claire already "claired" this up in her post below.
Or you'd Google the incident if you really gave a fuck.
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 9:28pm.
If you're biracial your default colour is defiantly black or at least brown
"Default colour"? No such thing exists.
Submitted by sushi on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 9:17pm.
Most biracials I know consider themselves black. Obama for example considers himself black. The world considers himself black.
How does this affect or challenge what I said? I simply clarified that Ashley Cole is biracial not black, and that biracial and black are not the same thing. Is Obama suddenly not biracial anymore if he chooses to identify as black? Your response was completely irrelevant.
tone deaf anyone?
Submitted by sushi on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 9:17pm.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 6:56pm.
Submitted by ponchiks on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:59pm.
Submitted by sushi on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:42pm.
Wasn't her ex black though?
Yes, he was.
He's biracial. And no that's not the same thing.
reply • report abuse
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Most biracial I know consider themselves black. Obama for example considers himself black. The world considers himself black.
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If you're biracial your default colour is defiantly black or at least brown but you never consider yourself white and as said neither does anyone else:)
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 6:56pm.
Submitted by ponchiks on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:59pm.
Submitted by sushi on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:42pm.
Wasn't her ex black though?
Yes, he was.
He's biracial. And no that's not the same thing.
reply • report abuse
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Most biracials I know consider themselves black. Obama for example considers himself black. The world considers himself black.
She loved someone once who is half black. Why does hitting a black woman = racist? Was the hit was racially motivated? Maybe toilet lady was a fucking asshole?
Cheryl is stunning looking, racist or not she is hot and I love Girls Aloud. Dont mind her new song either.
I do Pagents!
clairey claire - not true, she's totally dickmatised. Still is.
Submitted by Dgrin on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 4:41pm.
god saved the queen, she was wearing ear plugs: http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2012/06/04/article-2154562-13731EFD000005...
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I was wondering why for every 1 talented person, they had 5 hacks perform, but apparently the Queen wanted most of the concert for the younger crowd - talk about taking one for the team. I would have killed to have been one of Prince Philips's nurses while he was watching that mess on TV. The things that must have come out of his mouth.
And you know Andrew Lloyd wanted to drop Sarah Brightman (Where was she anyways?!?!?!!??!) in the middle of that "Sing" mess. In my perfect world, Brightman would have gone on right before Cole, too, to really freak her out.
MERCY JEBUS! I undestand now why the queen wore ear plugs.
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I've written a letter to MK...saying...I...love...youuuuuu.
Submitted by ponchiks on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:59pm.
Submitted by sushi on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:42pm.
Wasn't her ex black though?
Yes, he was.
He's biracial. And no that's not the same thing.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:25pm.
THIS woman judged a talent competition.
My thoughts exactly. And now they're trying to get her for The Voice UK LMFAO
Pretty much the whole concert sucked, it opened with Will i am dressed like a rejected midget toy soldier and went down hill from there. I recorded it but have not had the stomach to watch it sober.
She has a conviction for assault- She attacked a toilet attendant and allegedly hurled racial abuse at her but not sure if this was ever proved. Her ex husband, Ashley Cole is black or maybe mixed race, not sure. Anyway, there were rumours going round that he was into it with other guys in his team. When they got together the cynics said that it was a mutually beneficial bearding relationship to prove that she wasn't a racist bitch, and he was straight. My own cynical self predicted the marriage would break-up after 2 years in a blaze of publicity, having served it's purpose. It did and I feel smug.
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"It's always funny until somebody gets hurt-then it's fucking hilarious": The late great Bill Hicks
Submitted by WithinReason... on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:18pm.
You KNOW what she wants, GIVE it to her! *I'll watch, then I'll go back to Boner- Manjello* hehehehe
(Just kidding IF) ;D
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Makes another mental note of my "Reason's a kinky little minx" theory.
LOL!
Submitted by sushi on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:42pm.
Yes, he was.
I didn't know there was DNA in my ass!
Submitted by ponchiks on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:35pm.
Submitted by jackie on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:18pm.
Someone on another site said this girl is racist. I literally know nothing about her. Is that true that she said some racist shit?
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She slapped/ punched a black toilet attendant once many years ago and that's all that I know.
I didn't know there was DNA in my ass!
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Wasn't her ex black though?
Submitted by jackie on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 5:18pm.
Someone on another site said this girl is racist. I literally know nothing about her. Is that true that she said some racist shit?
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She slapped/ punched a black toilet attendant once many years ago and that's all that I know.
I didn't know there was DNA in my ass!
Submitted by Dgrin on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 4:41pm.
god saved the queen, she was wearing ear plugs: http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2012/06/04/article-2154562-13731EFD000005...
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Can you blame her?
I didn't know there was DNA in my ass!
THIS woman judged a talent competition.
*rolls eyes*
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"I'm thankful that I have everything that I want, and no one has anything better."
-Betty Draper
Someone on another site said this girl is racist. I literally know nothing about her. Is that true that she said some racist shit?
Whamo, you giving IF *extra hard* attention? Pfffft No wonder she's been acting up and writing all sorts of weird stuff from unicorn land! Frustration whamation, no thanks!
You KNOW what she wants, GIVE it to her! *I'll watch, then I'll go back to Boner- Manjello* hehehehe
(Just kidding IF) ;D
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Where the hell is autotune when it's urgently needed?
I don't understand why her mic was even turned on. She should have been FORCED to sing with a backtrack. Everyone uses backtracks these days. Didn't the Brits get the memo? Why was the lovely Queen subjected to that hellacious mess?
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Fair is foul and foul is fair..
Very attractive gal. Can't sing for shit.
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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie
Submitted by IrishFury on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 4:57pm.
Whamo, do you have a link to the McCartney singing disaster?
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Just jump around, LIVE AND LET DIE around the 10 mark hurt MY vocal cords.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gS1x1iFw3QE
Submitted by IrishFury on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 4:56pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 4:51pm.
*Not quite sure how far "over the line" that is*
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SOMEONE CROSSED THE LINE! SOMEONE'S IN LOVE!
REPORTED FOR EXCESSIVE ADORATION!\
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Don't fight it baby, face it you love my attention..and I like to give it to you...attention that is..*extra hard* :P
See what I did there, see how I spun that back all cool like? ;)
Whamo, do you have a link to the McCartney singing disaster?
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 4:51pm.
Submitted by IrishFury on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 4:32pm.
Whomosexual, it has become increasingly obvious in the past few days that you have fallen in love with Tom Jones.
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Hey you know I only have eye for you. Yes I said eye ;)
No I was just impressed, I can't say I know a lot of Tome Jones by any means but after watching the other oldtimers croaking out their once beautiful voices It was nice to see a 72 year old dude belt it out with a good strong voice.
I would throw YOUR panties at him no problem:)
And just for that I'D give it to you extra hard!!!!
*Not quite sure how far "over the line" that is*
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SOMEONE CROSSED THE LINE! SOMEONE'S IN LOVE!
REPORTED FOR EXCESSIVE ADORATION!
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by IrishFury on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 4:32pm.
Whomosexual, it has become increasingly obvious in the past few days that you have fallen in love with Tom Jones.
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Hey you know I only have eye for you. Yes I said eye ;)
No I was just impressed, I can't say I know a lot of Tome Jones by any means but after watching the other oldtimers croaking out their once beautiful voices It was nice to see a 72 year old dude belt it out with a good strong voice.
I would throw YOUR panties at him no problem:)
And just for that I'D give it to you extra hard!!!!
*Not quite sure how far "over the line" that is*
They should have had Gary Numan playing Are Friends Electric!!
I know some of you hate them but whatever that's cool, some people get them some don't no big deal
I LOVE Paul and the Beatles with all my heart but Sweet Geeezuz on a Popsicle stick Paul McCartney sounded so fucking bad it was PAINFULL for me to watch, he was easily THE WORST one out there. I can understand being who he is/was and what he/they meant to England and when the Queen asks you say Yes but it was embarrassing to say the least. Either fix your voice or if you can't then don't sing live because you're ruining your legacy
I was afraid I was the only one who thought he sounds horrible live. I feel like people can't criticize him because of who he is but I just can't listen to him sing, it hurts my ears.
god saved the queen, she was wearing ear plugs: http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2012/06/04/article-2154562-13731EFD000005...
Whomosexual, it has become increasingly obvious in the past few days that you have fallen in love with Tom Jones.
I hope beb doesn't find out.
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by tojo on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 4:24pm.
meh, she sounds a little Shania Twainish...
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Indeed, very much Tojo!
She was all over the fucking place trying to stay in tune, her ear monitors must have been picking up the humane society's workers handsets
Whams that may just be an unflattering picture of him. Why no pictures of Robbie Williams. Screw that bitch Gary. :)
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How can a man be a mom?
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Thu, 06/07/2012 - 4:19pm.
Oh holy hell I just realized that was Tom JOnes. Aging Fail
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Really DWM!? I kinda thought for 72 he looked pretty damn good, and IMO he sounded the best out of all the old timers. He was werkin that crowd and it gave me a little more respect for the dude becasue of it. lol!!
so.....:P :P pthttttttttttthp
DWM, "Queen Sucknfuck!" lolololol - I love that talented (aussie?) bitch! *said with tenderness and affection* ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦≈♠░░░░
meh, she sounds a little Shania Twainish...
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...the end
Oh holy hell I just realized that was Tom JOnes. Aging Fail
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How can a man be a mom?
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-