Of Course Honey Boo Boo Chile Is Getting Her Own Reality Show
Honey Boo Boo Chile, the go-go juice-guzzling breakout star of Toddlers & Tiaras, is getting her very own reality show produced by the same Lucifers of minions who put her on TLC (The Traumatizing Little Children Channel). TLC announced that Alana's spin-off show called "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo" will follow Ritalin's arch rival as she spazzes out at Princess Leia who has broken into the family palace to strangle her coupon queen mother with a chain. Deadline has more details about this soon-to-be hillbilly mess of a show:
The series, titled Here Comes Honey Boo Boo, is described by the network as “an inside look into Alana’s world where the 6-year-old pageant sensation proves that she is more than just a Go-Go Juice-drinking beauty queen. When she’s not chasing after crowns, Alana’s with her family in rural Georgia doing what her family does best: four-wheeling through mud pits and picking up road kill for the family cookout.” TLC has ordered six half-hour episodes to premiere in August.
The tragic part is that I'll probably watch every episode while drinking PURPLE DRANK (go-go juice is too classy for me) from a Big Gulp cup. Yes, I am the problem. TLC should just title this show, Brit Brit: The Early Years. TLC should also go ahead and green light a show for the 2022-2023 season called Dr. Drew Presents Tarnished Tiaras & Therapy starring Honey Boo Boo Chile and every other damaged child beauty queen from T&T.
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I love Honey Boo Boo Child but I'm afraid that mother of her's will let her natural charisma go to waste and let her do whatever when she's a preteen.
Plus, you know all that "show em your belly" bullshit is her way of instilling fat pride in that poor child, she clearly wants her to be obese so she isn't alone. I do like it when she grabs her belly, I think it's hilarious, but I just can't see her thriving around that inarticulate, puffy mother of hers.
Yeah, yeah, throw the "curves" argument at me, there's no way you can rationalize feeding red bull and ginger ale to a kid! That's so much goddamn fucking sugar.
lol Whamo! We all like, posh and shit down here.
OT this child and her mama make my pimp hand itch.
Alana's a terrific little kid. She's full of fun and amusing to watch. Good luck to her and her family.
"No matter how cynical you become, it's impossible to keep up." - Lily Tomlin
ROTFLMAO @ Whamo! "Well I say there!"
*pees on self*
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Just when you think society hit the all time low fucked up shit like this happens.
Submitted by sonne on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 4:49pm.
Submitted by Dog on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 4:19pm.
That woman is so batshit gross to look at it, I don't even want to know what she sounds like. Pass.
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Agree about her looks. Honestly, I want to be empathetic but she's carrying the overweight in a way that just creeps me out for some reason. She's just....gross. Guess it's the combination of everything else that's wrong about her and this situation, the squinty eyes, the obesity, etc.
These people shouldn't be rewarded with a show, they should be getting help to be more healthy and less dysfunctional.
^^^^^^^^^^^
I don't see how she hasn't been investigated for some sort of child exploitation or something.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
He's French Canadian. From between Montreal and Ottawa.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by Dog on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 4:19pm.
That woman is so batshit gross to look at it, I don't even want to know what she sounds like. Pass.
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Agree about her looks. Honestly, I want to be empathetic but she's carrying the overweight in a way that just creeps me out for some reason. She's just....gross. Guess it's the combination of everything else that's wrong about her and this situation, the squinty eyes, the obesity, etc.
These people shouldn't be rewarded with a show, they should be getting help to be more healthy and less dysfunctional.
Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:50pm.
Submitted by boredasfuckyo : "I was watching this series called Teens React on Youtube and they showed some teens this show with Honey Boo-Boo, and I was cracking up! Even teens can see how jacked up this shit is.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cIZ9IS4qgU8"
Ooooh, that was good! And this proves that there are some decent kids out there. They just don't get the attention that the bad teenyboppers do.
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Yea, there was one where they were shown a video of a guy shooting up his daughter's laptop because she kept writing disrespectful stuff about them on facebook, and alot of them thought it was awesome..hahaha! And I think the reason that decent teens don't get the attention that the teenboppers do is because they are out being productive, and unfortunately in todays society, positive behavior is over looked, with maybe a few stories here and there, but overall it's the negative bullshit that brings in the headlines and that just shows how ass-backwards our society is.
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I want you to get on them fat chubby knees and take muh manhood in to your sugarwalls!-Early Cuyler -Squidbillies-
Submitted by Stoney on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 4:31pm.
Lol we call it 7th grade. :) The Canadian also says "two hours and a half" and it drives me fucking insane! It's two and a half hours!
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Two hours and a half?? Nope that one's strickly your hubby, we say two and a half hours as well. At least I've never heard anyone say it like your hubby. What part of the county is he from, it might be an east coast thing?
Submitted by Sweetas on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 4:13pm.
Submitted by louise_brooks on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 4:11pm.
Whamo- we say it the other way. 7th grade, 6th grade, etc.
YEAH Whamo, you know, the RIGHT way. lol ;p
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What??? the 7th grade!? well aren't we just the posh one!
I feel like the QUEEN when I say that!
Well I say there, are you not in the 7th grade?
Bwahaaaaa!! :P
Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 4:29pm.
Not that I'd know anything about that, either...
Your secret is safe with me, Hekki San!
*tucks a snickers bar in fat fold*
Submitted by Orangina on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:43pm.
@boredasfuckyo
Yeah all those teens were smart except for the stupid brunette one. She seemed like a former tiara toddler.
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The one that looks like she lives in a retirement community in Boca Raton?
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I want you to get on them fat chubby knees and take muh manhood in to your sugarwalls!-Early Cuyler -Squidbillies-
dammit wrong thread lol!
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Maybe she can also let him choose when to stop shitting his pants? Who needs guidance anymore? It should come naturally! One day he will just sit on the pot and dump, so why force it!
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Lol we call it 7th grade. :) The Canadian also says "two hours and a half" and it drives me fucking insane! It's two and a half hours!
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by Fat Lady: "See that super-sized box of peanut M&Ms on the top of the shelf? You know that's just the tip of the stashberg."
"Tip of the stashberg" is fucking genius. I laughed for a full two minutes.
Not that I'd know anything about that, either...
I look at that picture and have to ask if the mother is mentally retarded. You just CAN'T look like that and have a "normal" IQ.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
all that's missing in the background are like 20 cartons of cigarettes.
if she's a break-out star, then sowwy, I'm stayin' in...
Submitted by Deb on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 4:17pm.
47 bottles of shampoo and they both have dirty hair.
They really do look greasy.
See that super-sized box of peanut M&Ms on the top of the shelf? You know that's just the tip of the stashberg. I bet she keeps a whole shit-load of munchy supplies in some hidden 'Armageddon binge bomb shelter'.
Not that I would know anything about that.
Just two more candidates for eugenics or sterilization...
That woman is so batshit gross to look at it, I don't even want to know what she sounds like. Pass.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Is that child throwing gang signs or is she having a seizure?
Submitted by MrrKat on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 4:03pm.
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The "significant part" part is the part that scares me! (and Atlanta has its own scary population, but it's a scary I'm used to having lived in cities my whole life)
Submitted by Athina on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:51pm.
She is one nasty looking piece of trash. How do women that fucking ugly get sex? Who would fuck that? Seriously?
an even fuglier ass hillbilly which makes me wonder how the kid is even this attractive...you'd think with that gene pool she'd have an ass for a face and a face for an ass
Pageant (and cotillion, for similar reasons) culture is completely fucked up. So many psychological issues screaming for attention, so little time.
Also, I'm with Fat Lady on this one - I'm heavy but this woman is ridiculous. With that as an example, the kid is doomed (not that she wasn't already with every other ounce of fuckery going down in this situation).
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Too weird to live; too rare to die.
47 bottles of shampoo and they both have dirty hair.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Submitted by louise_brooks on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 4:11pm.
Whamo- we say it the other way. 7th grade, 6th grade, etc.
YEAH Whamo, you know, the RIGHT way. lol ;p
Whamo- we say it the other way. 7th grade, 6th grade, etc.
Isn't that just known as child abuse???
Hmmmmppppfffff!
GO GO JUICE DRINKING BEAUTY QUEEN?!?!?!
I feel like going insurgent on whoever green lighted this dreck.
Submitted by Stoney on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 4:01pm.
The canadian totally says "grade 7" lmao!!!!
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I'm laughing at you goofing on me but I honestly don't know why, what the heck do you guys call it??
Submitted by girlfromipanema on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:53pm.
I'm not insulted, I'm shitting my pants. Thank god I live in Atlanta. The rest of the state (even some places that consider themselves "metro Atlanta) scares the crap out of me!
I live in "the rest of the state," and while most people here are all right...there's a significant proportion of the population that is "Honey Boo Boo Chile" bad, and sometimes worse. :-(
Submitted by KA on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:46pm.
Submitted by TexnDoc on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:38pm.
They just insulted the entire population of Georgia. I'm on the phone to Julia Sugarbaker and she's furious.
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omg everyone watch the fuck out her tirades are epic
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this one is classic:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZHw7XWky_A
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"... and her temper worse than wildfire it is gunpowder and blows up everything ..." Mary Shelley
OOPS
she has one already it's called Eden's World on LOGO, right?
in any case, Jabba the Hutt was cool back in 1984 in a movie, but no one's trying to watch a Jabba the Hutt reality show in 2012...and definitely no one's trying to watch Jabba Jr. morph - or should I say congeal - into an overly made up, sugar-addled pre-diabetic obese mini Hutt and with a 'TUDE to go with it?
sometimes I think Mother Nature really needs to thin the herd.
The canadian totally says "grade 7" lmao!!!!
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by louise_brooks on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:52pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:48pm.
For anyone that hasn't seen this fucking cow and her soon to be grade 7 stipper Hall of Famer here you go.....
Grade 7! So Canadian! I bet you call a dollar a loonie, too! ;-)
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? lol...don't you have grade 7 in the States?
Why yes we do AND a toonie no less :P
MK gave us a beautiful gift with this post. You horz have given me a beautiful gift of sore abs from laughing. I am grateful.
I think it's great that she is able to embrace her curves at such a young age.
That child is not healthy. Six year old children should not be that fat. It's not baby fat; it's toxic heart-harming belly fat. AND she still has all her baby teeth and very little hair. Something is WRONG with her. I'm not even going to get into her behavior and speech issues.
Also? Their house is EMPTY. I mean, it's neat and tidy for sure (and mine is not) and I'm envious of that. But there is nothing on the walls; no artwork, no books, no photos, only the barest necessities of furniture. What gives? They really spend ALL their money on pageants?
OMG You guys are killing me today with the comments! ROTFL!
I hate the mother and her disgusting infinity chin. She probably has to lift it higher that her fopa to wash under it in the shower. Honey Boo Boo, fame and fortune aren't your future. THAT is.
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"off brand work out sneakers"?
Ninja if I want to wear Spalding’s, ProWings, and Bobos to the gym, that's my damn business.
Bitch, I'm working out... Not doing daily cunt-nastics via Twitter.”
The apocalypse really is upon us.
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:48pm
goddam u now i will get no work done for at least the next hour. this clip is like crack for my eyeballs. cannot look away . . .
it's like a video scavenger hunt -- "find ALL of the fucked up parts and make a list in 4 minutes . . . GO!!!"
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:12pm.
Mom looks like they caught her mid-oink.
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Fucking hell, Hekki! I literally had tears in my eyes laughing at this comment!
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by TexnDoc on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:38pm.
<"Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:34pm.">
They just insulted the entire population of Georgia. I'm on the phone to Julia Sugarbaker and she's furious.
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I'm not insulted, I'm shitting my pants knowing they live this closes to me! Thank god I live in Atlanta. The rest of the state (even some places that consider themselves "metro Atlanta) scares the crap out of me.
attention-starved hillbillies - no thanks.
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Aniston is artistically, intellectually and reproductively barren.
Paltrow is a walking argument against nepotism.
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 05/31/2012 - 3:48pm.
For anyone that hasn't seen this fucking cow and her soon to be grade 7 stipper Hall of Famer here you go.....
Grade 7! So Canadian! I bet you call a dollar a loonie, too! ;-)
She is one nasty looking piece of trash. How do women that fucking ugly get sex? Who would fuck that? Seriously?