The Silver Fox vs. The Human Barbie
On his talk show, The Daily Mail Show with The Silver Fox!, Anderson Cooper continued to stretch his arm out toward that Peabody Award by bringing out the factory-defected Linda Hogan Real Doll who was the 2011 valedicwhorian of Pimp Mama Kris' Night School of Murdering Your Kid's Childhood with Botox for Some Screen Time. We all know The Human Barbie as that Ipkiss-faced pile of melted doll skin who's on The Daily Mail every other month for giving her 7-year-old daughter a voucher for future plastic surgery work. Well, Andy Coo had her on his show yesterday and he tried to get into her head even though he would've found more interesting shit if he peeked into the head hole of an actual Barbie doll. Once Anderson realized that The Human Barbie was only on his show for the free publicity (THIS IS NEW INFORMATION!), he dropped a "Bitch, Be Gone!" on her ass by telling her to sashay away. The audience's nostrils were filled with the scent of an over-microwaved Tupperware lid from The Human Barbie getting burned by the Silver Fox.
After the show, Anderson taped a video note backstage where he said that he banished her from his stage, because her brain is not capable of producing honest thoughts and he felt that the fame whore was only there to be a fame whore. Yeah, Anderson's light bulb takes a while to light up, but when it lights up, it REALLY lights up.
In all seriousness, Anderson is a real journalist, so he obviously did his research and knew what he was dealing with. That is why I can't co-sign this shit. Anderson could've played it three ways:
The serious journalist way: Don't put a fame whore on the show at all and instead devote the entire hour to important topics other serious news organizations cover like the day's most popular cat videos and an exclusive interview with the man who jumped out of a window during a local news report.
The semi-serious journalist way: Bring on a mental health professional to try to talk some realness into The Human Barbie before an agent from Britain's Child Protective Services storms the stage to drag her away.
The 100% STUNT QUEEN way: Bring out a folding table, cover it with delicious plastic breakfast foods (that bitch only eats plastic, right?) and allow The Human Barbie to enjoy it all during her interview before acting out a completely choreographed food fight after one of the audience members calls her a "DISGUSTING FAT LOOSER WHORE!" Then Andy's bald-headed security guard will come out and drag her backstage as everyone chants, "ANDY! ANDY! ANDY! ANDY!" Oh, and The Human Barbie should throw her shoes at one point during the brawl.
Obviously, I'd go with option #3, because I really want to see the Silver Fox throw a silicone croissant at a bitch.
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Anderson was brought up right by his mom Gloria Vanderbilt. Class, class, class. Even when he absolutely hates on a bitch, he's the epitome of politeness.
I love Anderson Cooper. I really do.
MK and I fighting over Anderson (see, the K stands for Krystle):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dcdhdzfbR_o
stunt queen = for ratings
I bought being upset in the first clip but to come back and go on about her being dishonest? Say what? I thought it was about what she was doing to the kid?
"Pimp Mama Kris' Night School of Murdering Your Kid's Childhood with Botox for Some Screen Time." MK ☺☺☺
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Anderson is becoming a joke.
He was being cruel to her - yes she talks rubbish for money, her kids don't have plastic surgery - but he probably knew that & she's nice.
She's just a broke ex-model who needs cash & it was sad seeing her walk off to cry.
She's a weak ass looking Barbie.
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The poster formerly known as Snow Owl formerly known as Nightowl, is ready to PARTAY!
AC said exactly what others out there in trash land wanted to say. She is dreadful and I am glad he said it to her ugly ass soul. For those who think Anderson is some "journalist" really need to have their head checked. Those who actually understand what the "news" industry is about will have already known the fact he is 100% fluff nothing more so those getting their panties in a bunch about his behavior towards the plastic woman are dense. Wake the fuck up...
Anderson Cooper is a FUCKING ASSHOLE who thinks he's part of 'the people' when he's a spoiled closet queen who judges absolutely everyone he comes across. Talk show hosts don't have to agree with or respect their guests - they invite them on to get a different perspective and he humiliated that woman for no reason. Fuck him and his sleazy boyfriend.
Anderson came off like a giant fucking asshole again. Seriously, he is the stunt queen in this situation not her. I hate his holier than thou bullshit when he is doing just as much attention whoring as people like Human Barbie and Kardashians by trying to get viral clips dismissing them.
She could just kill her kid already...this way she won't be sweating on stage.
Submitted by oh dave on Wed, 05/23/2012 - 2:09pm.
"Whenever anyone says something and then calls it "being honest" it's kind of telling. It sort of says that this person cranks out unadulterated bullshit 24/7 but this situation is special because it is about them giving you a serious judgment that should be taken seriously."
i agree with you, except that i will say it when i mean "ok, i'm tired of pussyfooting around with your sensitive ass and you don't seem to be getting the message so this time i'm going to put it as blunt as possible so we can move on." i haven't previously cranked out bullshit, but i may have held back on expressing the passion underlying my opinion or made too much of an effort to "be nice" ...
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Anderson get back on the front lines and real journalism; fergit these trailer trash phonies.
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"I knew that with a mouth like mine, I just had to be a star or something." - Barbara
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 05/23/2012 - 12:59pm.
MJT, that was too funny, I laughed despite the flu.
@Whamo, if I don't work i don't get paid, I have 2hr 50 min to go and since my hours are cutback by 70% by June 1, I'll just do what I can. I told my boss I'm sick-nothing back. I may just sign off though, my head is pounding.
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Awww my poor sweetheart:(
Why does he feel the need to explain and apologize? I am more offended by these dumbass shows that encourage these types of people and then sit there ooogling over them.
Anderson, you just keep being real Sweetie!!! And FUCK EM if they can't take a joke (i.e., themselves)!!!
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Fuckery is what fuckery does.
Seems all media is set up these days to keep people occupied with their own moral indignation.
OMG!!! Did that Russian whore take out a few ribs!?!
BTW - Jack so would!
Submitted by oh dave on Wed, 05/23/2012 - 2:09pm.
Excellent point. Conversely, when someone says, "Can I be honest with you?" I wonder what they were being BEFORE.
Aren't we always supposed to be honest.
I agree that AC was disingenuous here. Doesn't he know who's being booked on his show? Did he really expect some kind of bolt-of-lightning insight into why this dreadful woman botoxes her teen?
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
He loses me when he says, "I'm just being honest," because when people say that shit, I have been being honest the whole time and take it for granted. Also, it's the whitest way in the world to say "I keep it real" LOL AC keepin it real, g.
Seriously allow me to rant. Whenever anyone says something and then calls it "being honest" it's kind of telling. It sort of says that this person cranks out unadulterated bullshit 24/7 but this situation is special because it is about them giving you a serious judgment that should be taken seriously. Anderson is famous for the same reason as Tan Mom, his looks. And if this low-level self-righteous drama is what he is doing with his big break I'm just not in favor.
http://burning-plastic.tumblr.com/
Total PR stunt to boost ratings for the show.
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 05/23/2012 - 12:08pm.
So off topic but for all my chat, I am battling the most hideous flu since sat. night so I'm half dead and Mr F is in Florida all week. I could'nt even skype last night, I was too damn sick.
now I'm working from bed with a fever and swollen glands and hideous body aches, and i can't see past 4.15 today when the kids get home.
christ this sucks.
*marinates in misery*
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If you can get someone to go to your nearest drugstore, ask them to get you a box of Oscillo. A large box costs about $12 and will shorten the duration of the flu.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oscillococcinum (eta this is not exactly a ringing endorsement for the stuff but I SWEAR it worked for me)
My GP recommended this when I fell ill with flu the Sunday before our most recent trip to London - she said if my fever didn't break before flight time, I shouldn't go, which sucked as I had a ticket to see a play, and the old man had a ticket to see England play a friendly against Slovakia at Wembley.
I started the Oscillo on Monday, by Wednesday the fever had broken, and by Thursday flight time I felt well enough to go.
Lots of fluids help as well.
Feel better soon - the flu sucks ass.
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"... and her temper worse than wildfire it is gunpowder and blows up everything ..." Mary Shelley
Submitted by Lisbet459 on Wed, 05/23/2012 - 1:41pm.
Submitted by Anonymous101 on Wed, 05/23/2012 - 1:37pm.
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I think she looks good.
What? She does.
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Hmmm . . . she looks good - for a doll! But just too unnatural for a human. JMHO, though ;)
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Kitten Kaboodle - a Disney ho who did the ho stroll right ;)
That was awesome. I really like Anderson now. Super duper.
lmao guest!! I thought "uh oh somebody's husband came home early" at first but then he gets up and goes back in the house. Hahahaha
AC was never going to be Walter Cronkite, but I knew a talk show on Fox was not going to help his journalistic credibility.
While he is as cute as a box of buttons, he is also as smart as a box of buttons. I watched him on Jeopardy! Aiya!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Bitch, please, if you wanted someone worth talking to, you would have had ME in your show, not Human Barbie! Damn! AC can be really dense sometimes...
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Let me dirty up your mind.
Submitted by Anonymous101 on Wed, 05/23/2012 - 1:37pm.
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I think she looks good.
What? She does.
I dunno know about you slorz, but I think this is the creepiest human Barbie ever (Jacko, please don't tell me you would b/c that would make me all skeered like :\)
http://www.buzzfeed.com/peggy/valeria-lukyanova-the-ukrainian-barbie-dol...
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Kitten Kaboodle - a Disney ho who did the ho stroll right ;)
JERRY, JERRY, JEROOPER, COOPER, COOPEY, COOPY, COOPY!
Sweetas...ololol @ your play by play!
"I wish her the best, no hard feelings...I certainly don't want to be rude to anybody and I hope she doesn't feel that I was."
This is why I have no respect for AC and his high brow political correctness.
The guy can't even stand up for his own values or speak them aloud.
The woman exploits a child for profit and fame and he thinks that's wrong. But then he immediately tries to make her feel better.
I hope he never comes out publicly, just think of the stupid stuff he'd say immediately afterwards:
"I hope I haven't offended anyone with my lifestyle, I mean I would never want to hurt someone's feelings." With activism like this, who needs hate groups?
Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 05/23/2012 - 1:09pm.
Cool! Thanks for clearing it up for me.
EC - it's called a Monkey Orchid.
It's a flower, with a monkey face!
I stole it from SFRB.
I prefer Scotland's no. 1 male Barbie
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-VW1XZwF80
I do Pagents!
Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Wed, 05/23/2012 - 12:56pm.
Mine is right before that when he allllllmost makes it to the door and falls straight back, do the "shelf slide" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAA *L*
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"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
She's almost as fake as Anderson's cowering in the closet.
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Please: It's "rahnday."
Cindy Jackson is the orig. human barbie and quite frankly she went from fug to fab. But she is so airbrushed now that it's hard to know what she really looks like:
http://www.cindyjackson.com/
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Dark-sided!
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
Jack would hit it.
Steve Wilkos is the man. :D
Its the Steve Wilkos show where he kicks them off, right? Pretending he has standards? Jerry will keep anyone on!
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Dark-sided!
So sorry IF! *pats IF's face with a cool washcloth*
AC is Jerry Springer!
He just tries to sound important and serious at night. Even he knows it's a joke and starts giggling like crazy all the time.
The guy got famous for being pushed around on camera by hurricanes. He's just the guy we love to watch get blown :)
Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 05/23/2012 - 12:58pm.
Is that a monkey or flower in your avie? My eyes are all fucked up and I can't see WTF that is.
Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 05/23/2012 - 12:58pm.
I thought AC was a respected journalist, or at least WAS once upon a time.
How stupid. Jerry Springer, you have a challenger.
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...Agreed...never been overly impressed with AC...
...maybe now with this stupid show he's more fully in his native element...
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...'It's as if he's using the paint to represent something he's seen'...
Such pearl-clutching shock at a trash guest HE FUCKING BOOKED. Srsly, I'm verklempt that we still have this kind of journalistic integrity.
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"End well: this isn't going to." - MK
MJT, that was too funny, I laughed despite the flu.
@Whamo, if I don't work i don't get paid, I have 2hr 50 min to go and since my hours are cutback by 70% by June 1, I'll just do what I can. I told my boss I'm sick-nothing back. I may just sign off though, my head is pounding.
OK, sorry for off-topic, I'll shut up now.
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by Wanted on Wed, 05/23/2012 - 12:58pm.
Maybe she should opt for a rhinoplasty for a little definition at the tip of her nose.
YES. I am a cunt.
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Or maybe spend a few thousand on that grill. She's got snaggle tooth in a bad way.
By the way, that broad DOES NOT look like Barbie.
I thought AC was a respected journalist, or at least WAS once upon a time.
How stupid. Jerry Springer, you have a challenger.
That news clip...BWAHAHAHHAHAA!! omg it looked like his "pants" were half off of his ass as he came out. A halfmoon half backflip with a thumbs up finish. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Maybe she should opt for a rhinoplasty for a little definition at the tip of her nose.
YES. I am a cunt.
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"Let them measure my anus and see if it is dilated."
-Father Andrés García Torres, inventor of the Catholic Anus Ruler
The Coop just went down to Jerry Springer territory as far as I'm concerned. That "Get off my statge" bullshit is what that bald-headed tool Steve Wilkos does on his show. I thought Andersen Cooper had a little more class and substance.