No, The Great Gatsby Trailer Does Not Have A Jay-Z & Kanye Song In It

May 22, 2012 / Posted by:

Yes, it does and I’m just going to try to forget that.

I just watched my dog poo before he pissed (I did not know dogs can do this! Even I can’t do this!) and even that was less confusing to me than the first trailer for Baz Luhrmann’s 3D EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAAAAA remake of The Great Gatsby starring Leonardo DiCaprio, Leonardo DiCaprio’s main homegirl Tobey Maguire, Carey Mulligan and Isla Fisher. On one hand, this looks like a life-like video game and Carey Mulligan and Leo look like they have the chemistry of two flaccid peens. On the other hand, it has glitter confetti! Since this mess is in 3D, the glitter confetti is going to come at my face (I’ll finally know what it feels like to get a facial from Liberace)! Seriously, I think Baz had me at glitter confetti. But he could’ve thrown 3D glitter confetti on a piece of shit (which is probably what this movie will be) and I’d be happy. (No Scat Queen here.)

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