The Coal Miner's Daughter Is Going To Broadway
......and it's going to star Zooey Deschanel as Loretta Lynn. I'll wait here while you ask Siri, "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?"
At a show at the Grand Ole Opry in 1979, Loretta brought Sissy Spacek onstage and announced she handpicked Sissy to play her in the Coal Miner's Daughter. Loretta did the same thing for Zooey at the Ryman Auditorium last night. According to Playbill, Loretta told the audience:
“It’s a long way from Butcher Holler to Broadway in New York City. I never imagined I’d see 'Coal Miner’s Daughter' on a movie screen, and now I can’t believe it’s going to be on a stage for people to see,” said Lynn. “I’m going to be right there in the front row. And I know Zooey is going to be great – she sings and writes her own songs just like I do, and we even have the same color eyes!”
The show has a star, a website and producers, but it doesn't have writers or a director, so it might not even happen. Yeah, I'd rather Loretta Lynn play Loretta Lynn on Broadway (yes, she still can) than a come-to-life Holly Hobbie doll who is too damn lazy to look outside her window to see if it's raining, but I don't have any feelings either way about this. But mostly that's because the only feeling I'm feeling right now is queasiness. It isn't from this news, it's from eating a multi-vitamin with my lunch. See, I try to do something healthy and my body rejects it! I bet this wouldn't have happened if I ate a donut with my lunch. Fuck vitamins!
• 
Sorry...but who is his Zooey person? And Loretta Lynn still? This is kinda like those Shirley Temple commercials. Is anyone still alive that even cares?
Fat Lady
She is an unwanted and ubiquitous presence. She is a major "outbreak" in mainstream media and haunts my television worshipping hours!
"This better be important Jack, I was bidding on a bag of bras on ebay."
Liz Lemon
LOVE LOVE LOVE me some Lo-retty Lynn!! Why doesn't Loretta just play herself?? She's still got a good 40 years in her, for chrissakes.
I got to meet Loretta Lynn and she is a doll. Zooey is lucky to portray such a legend.
Has every casting agent in the world lost their mojo?! Can't wait for the "All About Eve remake with Miley as Margo and Fez as Addison DeWitt! o_O
Lol at your body rejecting the multi-vitamin MK, why don't you wrap them in some bacon! mmm bacovitamins ;P
•-•-•-•-•-•
"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦♮♠░░░░
You're not fooling anyone.
It's trying so hard today.
Michael K., you hot half Japernoozer! You CANNOT take a multi-vite on an emtpy tummy. EVER. EVER.
I doubt Sissy Spastic would do a very good job on BROADWAY... even back in the day. *HATES HER*
_____________________________________________
"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
Loretta, run!
Sorry.
Sissy did it best.
Anyone else is just a NO in my book.
Submitted by El Bastardo on Fri, 05/11/2012 - 2:09pm.
Zooey is cute but her 'Bones' sister is sexy cute.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Agreed ElB. It's the only show that me and my man watch together...cause we both have crushes on her!!! O_O
*edits "FIRST" to "frist"*
18thCenturyFox on Fri, 05/11/2012 - 2:11pm.
Used I be pro- Zooey before she went all herpetic.
Wait. What? Are you implying she's a Hilton Herp Valtrex (i.e. HHV) sister?
Guh ross!!!!! MUCH!
SISSY SPACEK IS THE ONLY ONE! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ON ZOOEY!!!!
I normally do not mind Zooey, but HEEEELZ NAW to this.
That's like remaking Enemy Mine with Channing Tatum and Will Smith. HELL! NO!
FIX ME UP WUN THEM BOLGNA SAMMWITCHES, GIT ME ALLL HORRRNY!
_____________________________________________
"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by innuendo on Fri, 05/11/2012 - 2:10pm.
i want to punch zooey deschanel in the face as hard as i possibly can
That'll be like treading on a fluffy 1 week old kitten. Terrible :(
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++=
My Lover!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=om9p0NUNlSk&feature=fvwrel
Used I be pro- Zooey before she went all herpetic. Now she's just a walking Coachella that insists on herself. Go Away. Stop singing. Gibbard is coming to eat your soul.
Maybe Jack White will take her out?
"This better be important Jack, I was bidding on a bag of bras on ebay."
Liz Lemon
Zooey's shtick may get old but she's nowhere as near annoying as her sister is. Emily can't even spit out her lines without the most random pauses like she can't remember them. It's made her show unwatchable.
**************************************
Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
El Bastardo on Fri, 05/11/2012 - 2:04pm.
FIRST!
You're so fucking juvenile (I THINK I LOVE YOU).
Grand Ole Opry is as embarrassing for white folks as Apollo Theater is for black folks.
*rubs the stump anyway*
i want to punch zooey deschanel in the face as hard as i possibly can
Zooey is cute but her 'Bones' sister is sexy cute.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++=
My Lover!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=om9p0NUNlSk&feature=fvwrel
I like New Girl cause it's funny, but I'm getting a little tired of Zoey's wide-eyed-wonder-I'm-just-a-quirky-girl shtick. It's the same shit that Taylor Swift does.
-----------------------
"off brand work out sneakers"?
Ninja if I want to wear Spalding’s, ProWings, and Bobos to the gym, that's my damn business.
Bitch, I'm working out... Not doing daily cunt-nastics via Twitter.”
Tommy Lee Jones was hot in that movie. I finally saw that movie recently and for me he stole the movie.
................................
Worrying is using your imagination
to create something you don’t want.
Jelly?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++=
My Lover!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=om9p0NUNlSk&feature=fvwrel
FIRST!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++=
My Lover!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=om9p0NUNlSk&feature=fvwrel