WARNING: Extreme Natural Romance And Elegance Ahead
Not since the Empress of Lucite's sex tape have I felt the soft sensation of angels blowing lucite dust into my eyes.....
Shauna Sand, the most beautiful woman in every universe and beyond, climbed to the upper echelon of demureness in St. Barts a few days ago by making sweet, passionate, natural, Skinemax-like love with her piece in front of the paps. That amateur trick Courtney Stodden better not get any ideas and she better slide under the rock from which she came from while our modern day Aphrodite takes the staged photo-op to the next level. Egotastic has the whole set and you might want to hold onto something steady and grab your smelling salts before you step in. There aren't any exquisite lucite heels, but there is a pair of b-hole hugging jorts. Click your way to romance.
Dear Deborah Kerr and Burt Lancaster, this is what your scene in From Here to Eternity should've looked like.
(Picture via FameFlynet)
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This is Paris Hilton's future in the next year or so...I mean obviously she has a sex tape already but I could see her imagining public "sex" as her next big break.
Is she sucking on a stalagmite?
That hair flowing - bitch please. STAGED.
Dog!!
the only one where it looks like they're actually having sex (ugh what is wrong with me why do i even care) is the blowjob pic. otherwise...seems set-up. duh.
www.hangryhippo.com: Where hunger, anger, media consumption, and satire meet for a snack
Submitted by IHateCharityChic on Thu, 05/10/2012 - 8:13pm.
THIS.
WTF is he wearing daisy dukes for?
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I'm jumpier than a virgin at a prison rodeo - Blanche Devereaux
Still, I must admit I looked at every picture and it makes me want to go back and see Pam & Tommy's sex tape (instead of this lame attempt) - now that's a cock to remember and some serious O faces.
His dick doesn't look so big in the bj picture. Her whole hand is around it first off, and second the majority of the shaft is in her clasped hand, and it looks like she has the majority of the head in her mouth. Average peen.
Move along. Nothing to see here but average meat, bad boob job, and fake O face.
Evening everyone.
If this was a movie, you know they would be the first ones to be shredded by the killer 3D piranha.
The BJ looked real enough!
" Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer"..William S. Burroughs
She is the epitome of class and elegance !!!!
Submitted by dcgirl on Thu, 05/10/2012 - 9:48pm.
Is it possible to get used to everyone knowing you have a mother who is a nasty, exhibitionist ho?
May I introduce you to the Kardashians?
Mmmmm.....not impressed
******** SAVE A LIFE. ADOPT A PET *********
well, at least she's geting some.
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Sir, you killed your date? What in the name of Phil Spector happened?
oh thank gawd they aren't showing her horrendous nips again!
those things are scerry.
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
This might as well be anime/hentai porn, since all I see are shots of Mr. Limpet giving a hummer to Nasty Canasta.
I thought this whore lived in England???
Submitted by Dog on Thu, 05/10/2012 - 9:48pm.
Right? Ha! Ha!
As for Shauna's daughters, I do feel badly for them. However, their mother was a Playboy model before they were born, and never changed her stripes. And they ARE in Hollywood. I imagine there is more tolerance there than BumFuck, USA.
Hopefully, they will vow to be the complete opposites of her.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
About as soft core as some European soap you'd watch after dinner over there. Dude never even stuck the tip of his soft little elbow macaroni in.
I can't see Courtney Stodden following. Her slut act is almost Disneyesque.
My heart goes out to her daughters. I can't imagine what it must be like for them to show their faces at school after this. Is it possible to get used to everyone knowing you have a mother who is a nasty, exhibitionist ho?
Submitted by Deb on Thu, 05/10/2012 - 9:46pm.
Submitted by Dog on Thu, 05/10/2012 - 9:44pm.
Deb, you didn't hear about the Great Marine Die-Off?
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LOL! No, Dog. However I did hear something about the old conches in St. Bart's complaining about a bad smell....
^^^^^^^^^^
Yeah, the local fish were complaining about the neighborhood suddenly smelling like the dump.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
I can imagine when the Caribbean waters were sucked into Shauna's Party Jump vagina, people headed for higher ground, awaiting a certain tsunami.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Submitted by Dog on Thu, 05/10/2012 - 9:44pm.
Deb, you didn't hear about the Great Marine Die-Off?
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LOL! No, Dog. However I did hear something about the old conches in St. Bart's complaining about a bad smell....
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Andrei...
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Deb, you didn't hear about the Great Marine Die-Off?
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Scotch blue painter's tape for everyone.
I CANNOT.
So there goes the Caribbean....I hope a hazmat team came by and cleaned up afterwards. Yuck.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Finally! Someone made good use of the paps. We need better photos next time.. but this is a good start!
All famewhores take note. IN THIS ECONOMY just have the papparazi shoot your sex tape! Kuntrashians I am talking to you!
Yeah, the pictures are stupid and couldn't look any more staged, but I still looked at every single one of them.
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Silly rabbit.
Wow, she really messed up her face like Lohan...
That's QUITE the invasion of privacy!
This is what she looked like, before she decided to give Elegance a Name...
http://www.google.ca/imgres?um=1&hl=en&client=firefox-a&sa=N&rls=org.moz...
Submitted by Naughychimp on Thu, 05/10/2012 - 8:46pm.
Ewwww. Her boobs are all dimpled and mis-shapen from the implants. *barf*
^^^^^^^^^^
In one shot you can see the scar around her aureola from the stitches.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by youarestupid on Thu, 05/10/2012 - 8:45pm.
You know she only had kids so she can borrow their clothes and have sex with their future boyfriends
^^^^^^^^^^^
Don't forget she also had sex with her stepson. She's a real piece of work.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Ewwww. Her boobs are all dimpled and mis-shapen from the implants. *barf*
You know she only had kids so she can borrow their clothes and have sex with their future boyfriends
follow the link... it's sure is a fake "o", but it lokks like a real bj...
Class!
You can't see Kutcher from this angle, but this is the best j/o material on this site in recent weeks. Awesome!!!!!!!
didja notice that you never see HIS face? LOL
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Thu, 05/10/2012 - 8:28pm.
Oh my god, Dog! Are you serious?
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Unfortunately no. I had a momentary brain fart and clicked on the link. Ugh.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
How is she "famous" in the first place?
Oh my god, Dog! Are you serious?
That is a "fakin' it" face. Trust.
Back in my skank days there was a cute guy I hooked up with who was terrible in bed. I would make these porn faces to try help him hurry up (oh, this is sooooo good!). He told me, "you make the most beautiful faces when we make love". Gag. First, that was not making love, dumbass. Second, my face looks good because I am faking it. A real "O" face is all contorted and weird.
And yes, it's highly suspect that we haven't seen any peen or poon. If they were really having sex and it was really candid, the photog would be trying like hell to get some genital shots.
*I* sure as hell would be trying to shoot the good stuff.
FAIL.
Submitted by TOPANGA on Thu, 05/10/2012 - 8:23pm.
This totally wasn't staged (this was totally staged for a soon to come voyueristic porno) at all.
^^^^^^^^^^
Do you remember her "leaked" and "homemade" sex tape? You know, the homemade sex tape with four cameras, a lighting guy and a director?
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
This totally wasn't staged (this was totally staged for a soon to come voyueristic porno) at all. Doesn't this woman have school aged children who will surely come across this? WTH?!
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
The man could potentially be hot, but there's no face or cock shots. WTF? We've been robbed.
Shauna Sand likes to provide visual aids for sex education purposes:
"Now that's mommy blowing uncle Euro-Trash-Dude."
"Now that's mommy being hit from behind."
She looks like she is not enjoying herself.
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"... and her temper worse than wildfire it is gunpowder and blows up everything ..." Mary Shelley
Submitted by IHateCharityChic on Thu, 05/10/2012 - 8:13pm.
What the fuck dude? And being European is NOT an excuse.
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Lol. I'm stealing that!
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What kind of fuckery is this?
Submitted by jelliebean on Thu, 05/10/2012 - 8:11pm.
....there's this creepy old wrinkled skinny dude with a long lens camera squatting on the beach a short distance away photographing my crotch...chased by some big hairy dude.
^^^^^^^^^^
You just described MK's vacation fantasy.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org