The Time GOOPY Told Courtney Love She Was Fat

May 8, 2012 / Posted by:

Courtney Love talked to Grub Street about food (yeah, I don’t know either) and said that chocolate is too average for her and she’s traded mainlining heroin for mainlining sugar at 4 in the morning. Courtney also dropped a dingle that you can slip right into the “That’s Our GOOP!” file. Courtney is trying to get back into acting and when she told her friend Fishsticks Paltrow this, she was met with a judgmental look down and some advice wrapped in organic bitchiness:

Sometimes I forget to eat. Right now I’m 125 pounds and five foot, eleven inches, but my “rock weight” was 160. I think I’m a sexy beast at 160, but Gwyneth is the one who told me that if you want to act, and I do want to get back to acting, “You are your own advertisement.”

Oh, and the funny thing is Courtney lost some chunk on a fish sticks and lemon water diet.

I once lost a ton of weight from a fish-sticks-and-lemon-water diet. That’s how I started my own band; I had to lose all that weight first, apparently. Anyway, I love lemon water; it’s the key to life.

I’m pretty sure “fish sticks” and “lemon water” is code for breaded heroin needles and meth pipe water. My idea of a Fishsticks diet is reading GOOP until I barf up everything but my stomach lining.

Fishy is right about the “own advertisement” thing. I mean, she’s obviously a walking advertisement for pretentious cunts and she does it so well. But Fishy needs to stop trying to change Courtney. Courtney is a stumbling advertisement for sloppy, crazy, delusional messes and if she changed herself who will sloppy, crazy, delusional messes look up to? Don’t make them look up to White Oprah. That’s just cruel…even for Fishsticks.

Here’s Fishy looking like Judy Jetson as a slutty nurse at the Met Ball last night. That weeping side-tit tells me she’s advertising bras or Cisco Adler’s saggy nutacks. Unfortunately, Courtney didn’t show up to the Met Ball last night, because she got into a fight with her dress on Twitter. No, Court’s dress isn’t on Twitter, but don’t tell her that. But Court was there in cracked out spirit thanks to Cocoa Rocha (who did not do Elizabeth Taylor’s old suit justice) and Chloe Sevigny.

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