Afternoon Crumbs

May 1, 2012 / Posted by:

Vanity Fair puts Marilyn Monroe on their cover again, but it could’ve been worse. They could’ve put (insert the name of a celebwhore that powers your eye rolls here) as Marilyn on their cover instead.  – Celebitchy

The make-up department of The Railway Man figured it’s easier just to throw some brown bangs over Nicole Kidman’s marble slab forehead than to try to paint lifelike wrinkles on it – Lainey Gossip

Willam somehow found a way to stuff my favorite phrase “dick cheese” into a Selena Gomez song – Towleroad

Pretty sure Lindsay Lohan came out of the womb with a Red in her mouth so the source (read: White Oprah) needs to stop with the “hardly smokes” shit – The Superficial

Kate Upton dances like a chimp having a seizure – Hollywood Tuna

Sofia Vergara’s nipples sort of come out for GQ Mexico – (NSFW) Drunken Stepfather

Michael Assbender is covered in way too much clothing in Esquire UKICYDK

The “meditation” should be an oil wrestling bikini match, because Tameka’s gladiator ass would have that shit wrapped up three seconds after the bell rang – Crunk + Disorderly

That tiny wolf dog is way too adorable to be seen with the likes of Miley’s ass – Popoholic

This is mostly what it looks like when my childhood farts – The Berry

How many Kardashians were shaved to make that vest Chupa’s wearing? – Popsugar

The Gay Super Bowl nominees are out! – Just Jared

Malin Akerman delivers – Cityrag

The fuck is Carrie Underwears wearing? – I’m Not Obsessed

Not-So-Fun Fact: The mall that was used for the Back to the Future mall is the mall where my junior high school friend told me to stand guard outside of the bathroom in Sears so she could get finger banged by her boyfriend inside. I still hate her today. – Hollywood Rag

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