Hot Slut Of The Day!
Because purple and red together is so now, here’s the glamorous new Purple Crab that was found on the island of Palawan in the Philippines by scientists. Scientists are trying to tell us that these Purple Crabs only exist on Palawan, because the ocean has kept them from traveling farther, but hooooooo please. Those scientists have a bunch of fancy degrees and have studied all sorts of rare crabs from untouched exotic islands and Parasite Hilton’s pussy, but I know glamour. The purple body…. The red polish on those claws… The twinkle of attitude in those eyes… The Purple Crab didn’t originate in the Philippines, it originated on Prince’s crotch! This crustacean formerly known as the Purple Crab is now known as the Prince Crab. Update your files, crab scientists!
And you are wrong if you try to order the Prince Crab at Red Lobster this weekend.