Kim Kartrashian Wants To Be Mayor
Kim Kartrashian has a sex tape, was married to a primitive dildo solely for publicity, barely pays taxes, thinks the poors are gross, has zero sense of real reality, would kick a disabled blind kitty for a dollar and so her natural next step in life is straight into the world of politics. I've always said that the tip or Ray J's boomerang dick is a stepping stone to running a city. Kim is already mayor of Whoresdale on Foursquare, but now she wants to be a the real maywhore of Glendale, CA. In a completely attention whory clip (and I'm falling for it) for the newest episode of Khlozilla & Lamar, Pimp Mama Kris' head ho tells Khloe about her plans to make Glendale's population drop from 200,000 people to a couple of golden shower fetishists:
"I decided I'm going to run for the mayor of Glendale. So you have to have full residency in Glendale... So for real, Noelle's going to head my campaign, but it's going to be in like 5 years. So I have to buy a house there. You have to buy a house there. Noelle and I are looking into the requirements and I'm literally going to have a huge... She's going to help me with my campaign. Cause it's like Armeniantown. But I need to wait like 5 years."
Because this useless piece of non-news should be taken seriously by the former mayor of Glendale, the former mayor of Glendale Ara Najarian is taking it seriously and tells The Los Angeles Times that he has offered Kim the position of "honorary chief of staff" so she can learn about city policies and shit. I bet the Glendale's city policies handbook is more than 140 characters long, so I'm hoping Ara Najarian is a genius who knows that Kim's head will combust into bronzer dust and Kanye jizz if she reads anything longer than a Tweet.
As much as I'd like to see Kim run for maywhore on the platform of labia bleaches for everyone, this isn't going to happen solely for the fact that I'm pretty sure a mayoral term is longer than 72 days.
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2 points for Khlozilla.
"I've had crabs. I've had lice. I've had the clap and that ain't nice. SO WHAT!?!?!?!"
Cunning cunt. A whore can be stupid, and yet cunning. Doesn't have to be smart to be cunning. Case in point. She must think her dick sucking skills will open any door she wants. Whatever, bitch. Looking forward to seeing her fall on her big ... fat ... ass.
And Sasscrotch there saying, "Mom says I get to be the mayor of Dallas!" - what are you, fucking 12 YEARS OLD?!! Jesus Christ ....
Submitted by dlaugher on Thu, 04/19/2012 - 11:24am.
This might actually work out well: First, she moves to Glendale, which is a plus. Next, while running for mayor, her opponents out her relentlessly, with lots of muted piss jokes. Finally, she spends vast sums to get elected, then gets caught in some scandal that results in a long sentence in federal prison. Hmmm, I like it...
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Please: It's "rahnday."
Submitted by RandéSleepover on Thu, 04/19/2012 - 1:39am.
Submitted by dlaugher on Wed, 04/18/2012 - 12:14pm.
No one is stopping Kim K. from doing some good works in Glendale right now.
How dare you! She's spent thousands at Americana at Brand in the past 12 months.
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It occurred to me yesterday that she just might think when running for mayor of "glendale" she's actually thinking of Americana at Brand.
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Please: It's "rahnday."* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Amnesty International
Shine a Light
Please stop giving this worn out cunt and her sister Princess Fiona coverage.
Glendale is part of a state that made Arnold ("It's Time to Say Hasta la Vista, Grey Davis!") Schwartzenegger its governor, for Christ's sake-- I wouldn't put it past them to vote in KK as mayor.
I'm very superficial, I hate everything official.
Submitted by dlaugher on Wed, 04/18/2012 - 12:14pm.
No one is stopping Kim K. from doing some good works in Glendale right now.
How dare you! She's spent thousands at Americana at Brand in the past 12 months.
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Please: It's "rahnday."
I almost fell asleep listening to that stupid botoxed cunt. She opens her trap and nothing interesting EVER comes out of it. Vacuous doesn't come close to describing this dimwit. Whoever would've believed that getting pissed on could be so lucrative??
Well if this is real, of all the fuckery that she's commited, this is a joke.
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"That bitch is scary. She really needs to be sat on a tricycle asking people if they want to play a game." - billykelly789-1 on Lady GaGa (IMDB 22/07/2011)
Eh, in five years she'll be as irrelevant as Paris. She's already started the downward slide.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by Yee-Haw on Wed, 04/18/2012 - 9:51am.
Not to sound like an ignoramous, but I have no idea what an Armenian is. Okay someone from Armenia, I get that, but I've never met one. Are they all fucking whore tramp slut piss buckets? I looked Armenia up, it's got a population less than 4M. I live in a more populated CITY. How can there be an "Armeniantown" in California? Do they multiply like rabbits in the states? Wait, how many Kuntrashcans are there? Forget it!
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Ummm, Yee-Haw, I'm not an expert, but i think due to the *genocide* of millions of Armenians, there are probably a lot less of them around these days. Also, like many other *ethnic* group, their "country" has been fluid through the years. There are lots of "peoples" in this world, not all with countries.
There is a pretty large Armenian diaspora. Many of them right here in So Cal. (I've met a few Armenians from the old Soviet Union and from Iran). I think there are almost as many Armenians here as in Armenia.
A lot of people with an "ian" on the end of their name are of Armenian descent.
Anyone else can feel free to correct any of this very general summary!
(PS: you know Cher is part Armenian)
• report abuse* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Amnesty International
Shine a Light
Submitted by Lowhangers on Wed, 04/18/2012 - 11:05am.
This vapid cunt needs to get her facts straight. Glendale doesn't elect a mayor. Its five council members, all of whom serve at-large, each year select one of their colleagues to serve in the city’s top post.
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Thank you. I was going to point that out. She will need to get on the council first and serve some time before it is her turn to be mayor. I actually met the mayor of Glendale last year. She is just an involved citizen. It's not a glory position really. No one is stopping Kim K. from doing some good works in Glendale right now.
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
Glendale is so much more than just Armenian, anyway. It's also heavily Mexican and Korean. It's the headquarters of many large insurance companies and lenders. She wouldn't get elected on just the Armenian vote. Besides, she wouldn't be happy there. Actually not her cultural or socio-economic demo.
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Please: It's "rahnday."
she WAS naturally gorgeous. She did not need to turn herself into the wax creature she is now. Look at her in 2007....I was floored by her beauty.
Of course, I hadn't heard her speak yet either.
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God sometimes you just don't come through
God sometimes you just don't come through
Do you need a woman to look after you
God sometimes you just don't come through
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 04/18/2012 - 11:45am.
Yes...McDonaldland!
Armenians ESP the women are very ethnic looking and gorgeous, naturally gorgeous, NOT LIKE THIS SLUT, and for whatever reason they made Glendale their adopted home...I worked for an all Armenian mortgage company 12 years ago in Glendale, I look Armenian though I am not, and they considered me a sistah! She does not represent typical Armenians, trust that...she is offensive and disgusting, skank HO!
I do not like jokes.
She offends ALL Armenians, humans, air,earth, animals plants and vegetables, I LOATHE THIS CUNT TO THE CORE OF HER BEING, btw I worked in Glendale, trust the won't let her dirty up pristine Glendale, no way no how.
Submitted by Stan Derp on Wed, 04/18/2012 - 11:36am.
She would run for McDonalds mayor McCheese
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I miss Mayor McCheese, Grimace and the Hamburgler!
EDIT- And, the fry guys!
She would run for McDonalds mayor McCheese if she could.
This vapid cunt needs to get her facts straight. Glendale doesn't elect a mayor. Its five council members, all of whom serve at-large, each year select one of their colleagues to serve in the city’s top post.
Gawd, I hate these bitches!
lol Rande (how do you do the accent agiu??)!! Like, rich of course!
Submitted by mike on Tue, 04/17/2012 - 8:31pm.
I've heard that many Armenian-Americans actually claim to be Turkish-Americans if the subject of the Kardashians arises.
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The tinfoil-wearing conspiracy theorist in me is thinking that the Turks spared this vile family, having the foresight to know how much shame and humiliation they would bring to their people in the future.
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Kitten Kaboodle - a Disney ho who did the ho stroll right ;)
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 04/18/2012 - 10:28am.
Also, what I can't figure out, is the timing of her assault. Was she waiting for Robert Kardashian to die? Why did she wait so long to put her plan of world domination into effect?
there were several factors.
1) reality TV didn't exist when she was young
2) daughter had to strike at the right time. timing is everything. she couldn't overshadow Paris in her prime, so she waited until Paris faded a bit. Nicole was never any competition.
3) she learned from the Hilton's mistakes...strength in numbers. that way, when one of them gets annoying, they just rotate the spotlight.
Submitted by Sweetas on Wed, 04/18/2012 - 10:42am.
Please. She would have a much better shot at mayor of a town full of black athletes. Know your demographic, ho.
LOL!! (There are towns full of black athletes? They'd have to be rich black athletes, right?)
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Please: It's "rahnday."
Submitted by char on Tue, 04/17/2012 - 9:45pm.
There is no mayor of Glendale, CA. Stupid. Useless. Whore.
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LOLz. The best part is the marketing. She doesn't want to be mayor so she can make a difference. She doesn't want to be mayor becuz she thinks she can do a better job than the current mayor. She doesn't even care WHERE she is mayor - as long as she thinks the people there will vote for her. Maybe if someone explains to her that being mayor will make her a Civil SERVANT she won't want the job as much. I'm sure she thinks it just makes her HBIC of a city at this point.
♥ Threadkilla!
"god bless, buy my single!"~Courtney Stodden
Please. She would have a much better shot at mayor of a town full of black athletes. Know your demographic, ho.
I'd never seen these bitches interacting, this makes me think even less of people who are able to watch this shit fest in its entirety.
It's never too late to be who you might have been.
~George Eliot~
Sure...first it's mayor then governor...then master of the universe, shoot me now!
Oh please - haven't the Armenians suffered enough??
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Kitten Kaboodle - a Disney ho who did the ho stroll right ;)
In order to rid ourselves of this scourge, me must destroy the source. Pimp Mama Kris. Has ever a more odious golddigger walked the earth?
And she's out to conquer ALL. Taking a cue from Jim Jones, Joel Osteen and L. Ron Hubbard, Kris funded a CHURCH. All those lovely tax-free dollars...
She's no dummy. A vile, amoral skank, but she's no dummy.
Also, what I can't figure out, is the timing of her assault. Was she waiting for Robert Kardashian to die? Why did she wait so long to put her plan of world domination into effect?
Submitted by didimao on Tue, 04/17/2012 - 9:17pm.
I feel sorry for the city of Glendale, CA. They should start a petiton now to keep her from ever running from Mayor, or pass a law that says if you have ever been pissed on by Ray J, you can't run.
They should pass a law mandating that lip liner must match the lipstick not the eyeliner.
A gossip guy on the radio this morning said Kim Kardashian called Serafina Restaurant in NYC and asked what time the papparazi arrived. She didn't want to get there before them.
She's a jewel.
Not to sound like an ignoramous, but I have no idea what an Armenian is. Okay someone from Armenia, I get that, but I've never met one. Are they all fucking whore tramp slut piss buckets? I looked Armenia up, it's got a population less than 4M. I live in a more populated CITY. How can there be an "Armeniantown" in California? Do they multiply like rabbits in the states? Wait, how many Kuntrashcans are there? Forget it!
Submitted by Athenys on Wed, 04/18/2012 - 1:01am.
"That bitch is like an event horizon of idiocy."
/golf clap
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by Condi the ingro... on Tue, 04/17/2012 - 11:22pm.
So the porn video didn't work, the fake marriage didn't work, no one wants to hire this bitch for movies, network TV, a book deal or an online series, she can't sing, no one buys the "true love" with Kanye - so now she's trying "politics" by inflicting herself on poor old Glendale? Jesus H. Christ.
don't forget the flour bombing.
I remember some website editor saying on the Today show, when asked how her community is responding to Kim's horrible incident of terror, she said "with sympathy for Kim".
I was thinking, CHING CHING...she just earned her fee. website ads don't pay all the bills, ya know. #getmoneybitch
Hasn't she died yet? for fuck sake, can they just fucking die already. JUST FUCKING DIE.
Ladies and gents, I give you the Armenian Sarah Palin.
I mean like, for real, liiike, this chick literally has three brain cells, and two of them are fighting each other.
And they don't have elections. You have to be on the board for years and you are appointed. But, as Good Morning America just pointed out this morning....she has five years to figure that out! :)
"maywhore"...i have no knowledge of a phrase more fitting. Bravo,MK,bravo!
Yay maybe that la cresenta bear will find it's way back, piss on her, then eat her.
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"that's the first time i had dick in my mouth, and that's the last time i'm going to choke on it.." Dani
Glendale is like LITTLE ARMENIA so all of the unibrows will probably vote for this souless whore.
Cute little advertisement for a Dallas department store there.
http://www.stanleykorshak.com
I expect my luxury handbag in the mail aaaaannny day now, darlings.
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God don't like ugly.
Ahh hell....the Apocalypse has begun. How can we get rid of these *whores*??!
Damn...I truly believe that if the Earth was destroyed by an atomic bomb or WMD, when all human and animal life were gone you'd still be able to walk around and see cockroaches and f'n LardAssians! Oh, and larkspurs! Can't kill those damn things!!
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Mountain Dew is also the perfect butt douche to turn to when that stubborn gerbil refuses to fall out of your ass.-Michael K.
Glendale is the third largest city in Los Angeles County, 200k residents, a fourth Armenian. Does she really think because she lives there she can run it?? It's a city with real problems like most that size are. She will be laughed out of town, er, Armeniantown.
Also, that town is so dam boring her ho'ing ways won't last 3 minutes there.
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And little one, hold out for a c-section. You don't want to slide down that. ~ Sweetas
So for real, in five years she could have a college degree in, like, political science ....bwahahahahaha.
die whore die..just die already...please die...die kim die
Please do not let her be alive in 5 years.
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My Momma told me, "Be careful who you do, 'cause karma comes back around"
Same ol' song, na
But I was so sure that it wouldn't happen to me
'Cause I know how to put it down
But I was so wrong
She isn't Armo and no Armos consider her one. Her surname may be Armo, but she wasn't raised by an Armenian mother and grandmother, so she isn't one of the tribe because she doesn't understand shame and guilt.
If she was raised by an Armenian mother and grandmother they would have committed suicide rather than live with the shame. But then again, if she were raised by Armo women she'd be a doctor, lawyer, or kebab shop owner.
the DUDE! abides...
KK was inspired after reading the story about two of her fellow porn stars who are running for office in Taranto, Italy. That 'Ara' fellow is only humoring that twat's delusional foray into politics so that he can get his hands on her...kakes. It's like an infinitely lamer take on Donald Trump's bid for the U.S. presidency which, btw, was about as convincing as his toupe. Sitting on a city council making day-to-day decisions on everything from garbage rates to civic events is mind-numbingly tedious. A budget? What's THAT? That bitch is like an event horizon of idiocy.