Angie Is Wearing An Engagement Ring Now, So Says Some Jewelry Designer (UPDATE: Yeah, They're Engaged)
It's been exactly six long minutes since the last "Brangie's getting hitched" rumor, so THANK MADDOX that The Hollywood Reporter ended that dry spell by giving us a new one. Robert Procop, who worked with Angie Jolie on her The Style of Jolie (barf) jewelry line, says that she's wearing an engagement ring designed by him and Brad Pitt. Angie wore a huge ass diamond on her left vein claw while walking through LACMA's Chinese Galleries collection with Pax and an unidentified freeway underpass hobo, and Robert says that is the ring every Brangeloonie is going to try to recreate using foil from the mental hospital's kitchen pantry. Robert confirmed that it is an engagement ring and explained it like this:
"Brad had a specific vision for this ring, which he realized over a yearlong collaboration. He wanted every aspect of it to be perfect, so I was able to locate a diamond of the finest quality and cut it to an exact custom size and shape to suit Angelina's hand. Brad was always heavily involved, overseeing every aspect of the creative design evolution. The side diamonds are specially cut to encircle her finger. Each diamond is of the highest gem quality."
Highest gem quality? That confirms Angie's ring is made from one of her own kidney stones.
If this is actually true, then say goodbye to your loved ones, because it's only a matter of time before we all combust from the high-pitched screams of the Brangeloonies after Brad and Angie quit each other. They've already jinxed their holy union by agreeing to do another movie together and now they're really jinxing their asses by getting engaged. Stick a fork (the one that Angie isn't using to eat) in Brangelina. Those bitches are done. I mean, marriage is the number one cause of divorce. I swear that sounded a lot smarter in my head.
UPDATE: Brad Pitt's rep just confirms to People that he was telling lies when he said the first time that they wouldn't get married until I can marry Anderson Cooper in every state. How can we ever trust Brad Pitt again?!
"Yes, it's confirmed. It is a promise for the future and their kids are very happy. There’s no date set at this time."
And Jennifer Aniston will drug Justin Theroux and drag him to the nearest 24-hour chapel in 3..2..
• 
Maybe Brad feared Fassbender's peen.
And claiming the kids want them to get married. These kids aren't old enough to know shit about marriage and I seriously doubt any of them begged for this to happen.
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EXACTLY! Why would the kids even know anything about them NOT being married? My children automatically assume mommy and daddy are married (and we are) and it's not because we have wedding pictures all over the house or discuss it - it's just implied b/c we live under the same roof and are known as Mommy & Daddy. WHY would you tell them otherwise? Of course, Maddox was old enough to know the difference but the other 5 were clueless.
ALOT explaining, over analyzing, and too many fuckin' details must go on in that household!
looks awfully plain to me.
just a band with an emerald cut with some diamonds around it?? i dunno doesnt look all that special.
"Specific vision", my ass. A honkin' big diamond mounted on a precious-metal band -- such an artiste!
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This episode brought to you by the letter SHUTUP.
And, of course this comes out today since Aniston just got interviewed saying how happy she and Justin are. It does make for some giggles though.
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I'm your huckleberry...
Aniston had an interview trying to convince people she's happy?!? my! that is breaking news!!
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Aniston is artistically, intellectually and reproductively barren.
Paltrow is every argument against nepotism rolled into one.
They just confirmed this shit ON THE AP NEWS SITE.
Ugh.
THIS IS NOT NEWS.
Congratulations Angie and Brad!! No one really gives a fuck except for the fact that everyone knows this will drive Aniston over the edge. Schadenfreude is a wonderful feeling!!
Aniston is on the phone with her publicist right now ... look for some fake competing press release about how happy, happy, happy she is in her desperately lonely and narcissistic life by Monday. It could almost write itself she's released its clone so many times.
Everyone knows her current "boyfriend" is gonna sneak out the bathroom window in the middle of the night limping, but happy, because he finally was able to successfully chew off a lower leg to escape the chains she locks him in every night.
She's prolly sitting on her bed in her all pink frilly bedroom right now surrounded by all her foul smelling cats and spraying J'Alone all over herself and looking at albums of all her ridiculous magazine covers as she notches another romantic failure in her bedpost.
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Aniston is artistically, intellectually and reproductively barren.
Paltrow is every argument against nepotism rolled into one.
And the world heaves a collective sigh of refief..... Whatever! And, for the record, Anistons ring was much nicer, from what I can see from the pic of AJ's claw.
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I'm your huckleberry...
They have museums in Los Angeles?
SVP. Does anyone has link to the ring in question? D Y I N G to see the thing. If it's good who knows maybe will sell.
No matter what it looks like their jewelry designer affectations cannot top, no way, the PR bonanza of the gems Richard Burton gave Elizabeth Taylor over the years. This is a paltry me too, a mere shadow of the buzz around Liz and Dick. Why bother? Keep it private. Can't they just do somethings in private?
At some point, they will need to break up for them to be interesting again.
Break up and then play with the media on whether they are getting back together again.
You know those ho's will do that eventually just for that PR reason.
Fuck. This story will garner yet another cover of a tabloid with a picture of Anniston looking down and miserable.
What's the media's fascination with these people?
I could maybe like Angelina again if she let the crazy out and hooked up with somebody new on a film set and severed her relationship with Brad. And maybe if somebody punched her in the nose and messed up that 'plastic' one she got just a little bit. And if she gained a little weight. Ok, maybe I wouldn't like her in the end, but it would be a lot more interesting. Maybe she could switch to women. And maybe Brad could enter his midlife crisis stage. It's just that they're not that old and how long are we going to be stuck hearing about this?
Indeed, they are just so boring, but not normal enough to be likeable or tolerable. Just annoying. I guess they try to play pretend at being normal.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 3:14pm.
GOD BLESS THE WHO-GIVES-A-FUCK!!!
The Gospel, AMEN.
Just when the tabloids were going the way of the soap operas - extinct, gah1
Oh many diamonds today are not from Africa but Canada amd more competitively from Russia. If you buy a diamond today originating from any of the African countries they are likely to be conflict free diamonds. But let me tell you, the Russians have broken the diamond market wide open. Same if not better than the best South African diamonds for half the price.
Submitted by K2 on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 3:04pm.
Nothing like making it sound like he was hand picking diamonds straight out of the mine.
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K2 are you serious, of course he did just that! He flew to Africa, road a donkey for 12 straight days thru the jungle (getting yellow fever twice), climbed a 15,000 foot mountain only to descend 30,000 feet into the ground and armed with only the strength of his bare hands driven by the inexhaustible love in his heart he chewed the diamond from the rock with his teeth polished it with strands of Jeniffer Aniston's hair, climbed back up and then down the mountain, tied the diamond to the back of an African brush-footed butterfly that he's trained to migrate to America
and on a sunlight morning the butterfly landed on the end of St Angie's bed with a little note that said "will you marry me" to which St Angie smashed the butterfly DEAD took the diamond rolled her eyes at it puny size threw it into the same cup she keeps Brad's balls and made a note not to feed the kids until Brad got back from Africa.
What do you mean you don't understand the worship of St. Angie Ho. Don't you know she is THEMOSTBEAUTIFULWOMANTOEVERWALKTHEEARTH, she is the GREATEST actress of all time and she's going to save the entire gottdamn planet and everyone on it ALL BY HERSELF!!!! Now get on your knees and worship properly.
Submitted by lunamor on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 3:16pm.
The Aniston engagement ring
http://www.ringenvy.com/files/imagecache/ring_475w/files/Jennifer%2520An...
Tacky.
blah blah blobbedy blah blah blob who fucking cares. brangelina should be hilarious when they have six out-of-control teenagers in their 'house' (because they really don't have a 'home' do they?)
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 2:53pm.
distal phalanx
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Fuck you for making me google this shit! I almost made it a whole day without googling something some wise ass said.... phrrrnt phrrrnt
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"You reap what you fuck." ~ RichBitch 03/13/2012
The Aniston engagement ring
http://www.ringenvy.com/files/imagecache/ring_475w/files/Jennifer%2520An...
Submitted by DonnaInMichigan on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 3:14pm.
It's a PR gold mine for Brangelina......as they probably need the dough. It gets quite expensive when you have to pay for an entourage of 30 people, and not have any profits from movies over the last couple of years!
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There was a piece in the National Enquirer about them being short of money and needing to cut back drastically.
I didn't make too much of it at the time because, well. But it might make sense. Their peripatetic lifestyle would be incredibly expensive, especially with 6 children and god knows how many servants.
Who gives a fuck....
They've been together long enough that they could have gotten married several times over without anyone knowing.
Such attention whores.
On the other hand M.K. you are a genius....
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...the end
GOD BLESS THE WHO-GIVES-A-FUCK!!!
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"You reap what you fuck." ~ RichBitch 03/13/2012
Guess someone needs some PR.
Honestly, these two are such famewhores to the nth degree.
The timing of this is ridiculous. They've had seven looooong years to get married and now that Aniston might actually be walking down the aisle they have to go and shit all over it. They could have gotten married last year or next year, but noooo, it has to be now so that Aniston can look like she's competing with them when it's actually the other way around. They are such assholes. And claiming the kids want them to get married. These kids aren't old enough to know shit about marriage and I seriously doubt any of them begged for this to happen.
Also, I'm pretty sure that Brad Pitt has spent half his life designing engagement rings for the women he dates.
Oh God, can you imagine how many millions of dollars People Magazine will be forking over for them to be on the cover of their magazine for the "Yes, we are engaged!!" photo spread, then the wedding photo's to follow? Didn't they pay like a sum of 22+ million dollars for all the kiddie photos? Heck, that will probably cover all the wedding expenses and Brad will probably have enough left over to finance another one of his vanity projects, that will eventually be yet another financial loss!!
It's a PR gold mine for Brangelina......as they probably need the dough. It gets quite expensive when you have to pay for an entourage of 30 people, and not have any profits from movies over the last couple of years!
Submitted by mike on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 3:03pm.
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 2:51pm.
They're so fucking boring. I honestly don't understand why anyone cares what they do.
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For real.
Brad's okay, I guess. He's a decent actor and he picks decent roles. He's a bit dim, but inoffensively so. He's still a good-natured MO hick.
Angie's looks are long gone. She's a mediocre
actress and her projects are crap. She seems to have an obsession with violence, which is odd considering her humanitarian posturing. Her father's a nutter (and I suspect her mother was too), so I think it's genetic.
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I could understand loving AJ in a camp, referential way. In her younger, hotter days, she was essentially a slightly alternative Barbie. I had a gay friend in secondary school who basically worshipped her. He actually...wait for it...watched all her films. Several times. All the way through. But he was 16, and camp as Christmas.
I don't understand (1) worshipping her in her current knobbly, veiny incarnation and (2) doing it seriously, as opposed to in a fun, ironic way.
She's had a few decent films, but nothing would warrant the unquestioning adoration she gets. Not even the Mommy thing explains it. I know some very attractive mothers, with large families (some of whom they even adopted!) but none of them get this kind of acclaim.
Brad is actually talented. Dumb as a box of hammers, but talented. Her I don't get.
Diamonds are not unique, extremely overpriced and totally overrated, just like these fucks.
~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♥~♦¤♦~♥~
FANTA FANTA, NO COKE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lnRDU4LdZE
Meat Loaf was in the middle of a show when his knees suddenly hit the stage floor like a narcoleptic bat out of hell ~MK
I think it's kinda nice that they take their kids to museums and shit, at least they pretend to try
as for the engagement, WHO CARES, they are an old married couple
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
Submitted by Athina on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 3:00pm.
I wonder if he had to grease up the ring to get it over those knobby-ass knuckles.
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If she just ran her hand thru Brads hair I'm sure it would just fall off.
Brad looks like the greasy lump I see outside the bank everyday.
OH shut up!! Took him a year to work on this??? Is this how long it took the tool to learn about the 3 C's?! CUT, COLOR, CLARITY, Brad! It's not that hard..any experienced jeweler can help design it. Nothing like making it sound like he was hand picking diamonds straight out of the mine. PLUS, he did the same exact thing for Aniston. If memory serves, it was gawdy. So ...uh, not so special, Ange. Plus he didnt make her wait 6 years and 6 kids later, to finally offer it to her.
The ring looks plain. Sure it's a nice size diamond. But there's nothing to it - no detail that we can see.
They seem to have matching hair colours.
I just threw up a little in my mouth.
He looked much better with the blonde hair. Remember when he was working with Ellen DeGeneres with Habitat for Humanity? MUCH better, but he seemed to switch back a few days later.
Sweetas- All my crime scene show watching is paying off!!!!
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 2:51pm.
They're so fucking boring. I honestly don't understand why anyone cares what they do.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
For real.
Brad's okay, I guess. He's a decent actor and he picks decent roles. He's a bit dim, but inoffensively so. He's still a good-natured MO hick.
Angie's looks are long gone. She's a mediocre
actress and her projects are crap. She seems to have an obsession with violence, which is odd considering her humanitarian posturing. Her father's a nutter (and I suspect her mother was too), so I think it's genetic.
I wish they would piss off. He has not been remotely hot since Troy. And the last time I was excited about anything she did was when she made out with her brother in public.
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I've got ten bucks and me and dirty eddie are staying out all weekend! - Rob Pue (thank you BBitch and Sweetas)
The difficult brown?! I think we're all done here. -MK
I didn't notice the ring, my eyes were drawn to those nasty veins, Brads Crisco hair do and the vase that Brad's balls are in.
I wonder if he had to grease up the ring to get it over those knobby-ass knuckles. The last time I saw hands like that, they were attached to a prizefighter.
"Pax, this would be your sink now if mommy hadn't saved you."
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Please: It's "rahnday."
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 2:53pm.
HAHAHAHA!! Oh Uvy I love it when you speak Smart *kisses you up your arm*
Hekki - it' was Aniston. I have a fakey duplicate of it because I liked it.
But I never wear it. Too big and awkward on my hand.
Cannot really see the ring from that angle.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
they have been together and have kids, probably feel like they are married....who gives a flying fuck about a ceremony and a piece of paper?
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People say believe half of what you see
Son, and none of what you hear
But I can't help being confused
If it's true please tell me dear
Knowing Angie, "pefect" means it's a blood diamond, with actual blood still on it.
Does anyone remember when he was engaged to... Was it Aniston or Goopy?... He had designed the ring with diamonds all around so whichever way the ring turned, she could see diamonds?
Or did I misremember that? I remember a coworker rolling her eyes about that. I'm pretty sure it was Brad who designed a ring like that for his beloved.
Off to google it.
Can't stand those two. And now Aniston is probably surrounded by her beanie dolls crying her heart out.
I truly believe that you haven't begun to scoop up all of life's beautiful moments until you've heard the line "Watch the wig!" from a piece while sitting on their face. - MK
If they wanted to match her hand perfectly, they would have forgone a diamond for a distal phalanx, correct?
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
So now they are "engaged"? The other day it was all over the net that Ang has been cheating on Brad with an ex. These stories about them are really old. They need to fade away, just like their looks.
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What in the praying mantis crackhooker hell is this?! - MK 9/09