To celebrate her fourth wedding anniversary with the world, Beyonce opened the doors to her Tumblr Shrine to Beyonce today and gave you the gift of HER!!!! I see Beyonce trying to outshine the resurrection of Jesus. Beyonce’s Tumblr has a video (above) of her going on about some blue ivy tree (Fun Fact: That tree was later cut down and the wood was used to make the Blue Ivy decoy doll Beyonce carries around.) and then there’s dozens of pictures of her being fancy and rich and shit.
There’s Beyonce on a yacht. There’s Beyonce posing in front of Basement Baby’s front door. There’s Beyonce posing in front of bottles of diamond water. There’s Beyonce on a private jet, and finally there’s Beyonce in front of a MaybachRollsRoyceBentleyWhatever. My eyes did start to slightly turn green like Beyonce’s Tumblr was Samantha Brick and I was a homely ass woman, but then I came across a picture of Beyonce with GOOP. Travel on the East River Ferry or travel on a private yacht with GOOP? I’ll take the East River Ferry. GOOP is a deal breaker.