A Match Made In K Hell

Out of nowhere last night, Kanye Kardashian née West released a new song called Theraflu where he rap confesses that he crawled up into Kim Kardashian’s K hole of doom while she was in the middle of her 10 second-long marriage to Kris Humphries. Here are the poignant lyrics that are making Pimp Mama Kris’ pimpin’ hand quiver something special:

And I’ll admit I fell in love with Kim/ ‘Round the same time she fell in love him/ That’s cool, baby girl do your thing/ Lucky I ain’t have Jay drop him from the team

Kanye Kardashian’s fame whore clock is perfectly synchronized, because just hours after he dropped that song, TMZ had pictures of him and Kim doing the STUNT QUEEN strut out of a Manhattan movie theater after seeing The Hunger Games. There’s something perfect about two thirsty whores watching The Hunger Games together. A source tells TMZ that Kanye and Kim have been chewing on each other’s ass for a little while now.

This was bound to happen and we should just be thankful that their egos in one room together will shatter any industrial-strength camera lens, so we’ll never see a real sex tape of these self-absorbed hos humping on each other. Actually, I doubt Kim and Kanye even touch. Their idea of getting off is doing themselves with a mirrored dildo in a completely mirrored room so they can see themselves from every angle.

Kim and Kanye keep searching for love, but Kim will never love anybody as much as she loves Kim and Kanye will never love anybody as much as he loves Kanye. They can have a group marriage!