Here’s Christian Bale and Wes Bentley shooting scenes in Santa Monica at sunset yesterday for a new Terrence Malick movie, and since this is a Malick movie you won’t see any of these moments in moving picture form. When Terrence Malick finishes editing this movie, you’ll only see 45 minutes of an intense close-up of a foam bubble on a wave followed by another 45 minutes of sand trickling out of Christian’s hand. You won’t see Christian making the full “sittin’ on da toilet and really excited about it” pose (alternately: the “anal oral handy special” pose). You won’t see Christian and Wes having dylsexic-style butt sex. You also won’t see Christian and Wes not knowing how to quit each other.
Oh well, everyone involved is still going to win all the Oscars for this shit. That includes the seagull who felt the wrath of Christian’s airborne punches after it crashed his scene. Just add seagulls to the list of things Christian is fucking done with, professionally.