The California Mug Shot Museum of Beauty founds its new Mona Lisa over the weekend when Laurie from That ’70s Show gave the camera some methed out tarsier realness. Lisa Robin Kelly claims that legendary mug shot shoot should have never happened, because it wasn’t not funny and she wasn’t not guilty of all charges! Lisa Robin Kelly was charged with spousal abuse, but she’s telling TMZ that: a) She never whooped a trick and; b) The trick isn’t even her husband or boyfriend. Lisa then reached into White Oprah’s ass, swat away a few empty vodka bottles and pulled out the only excuse in there: I WAS SETUP!
Lisa says that the guy she allegedly beat is actually her roommate and he’s the one who slapped her around. Lisa and her man roommate have been getting into it for a while now, and when she tried to move out over the weekend, he went after her. Lisa called the police, but her roommate fled the scene before they arrived. Lisa didn’t want to waste her time pressing charges, so she dropped it. Lisa thought it was over until she found out that her roommate waltzed into a police station with cuts all over his face and claimed that she attacked him. Lisa went on to explain, “He must have scratched himself or done something to himself. I am clean and sober and I have made a lot of progress. I am completely innocent. I weigh 105 pounds. I could never hurt him. I just want to start working again.”
Who to believe? Who to believe? The only evidence we have to go by is Lisa’s Faces of Mordor mug shot. Lisa’s right brow looks like it was in a tussle and lost, so that supports her story. But Lisa’s eyes have that same glassy glare your friend gives you right before they’re about to scratch your throat out for taking the last hit from the meth pipe, so that supports his story.
As they say, this story is developing….as is the lawsuit Lindsay Lohan is going to hit Lisa Robin Kelly with for stealing her trademarked excuse!