Adam Levine And Anne V Aren't Doing It Anymore
Anne V's belly button is breathing a sigh of relief, because it will no longer get hit with a load of Adam Levine's douche chowder when he practices his fool-proof birth control method by pulling out. Anne V tells E! News that Adam Levine has pulled out of her for a final time and they're done FOREVER! I know, the cherubs are pulling out arrows to shoot themselves in the heart, because a rock star breaking up with a model tells us that the sanctity of marriage is a falsity! This is the statement Anne V shot into E! News the same way Adam's peen shoots into a hotel towel:
"Adam and I have decided to separate in an amicable and supportive manner. We still love and respect each other as friends. I wish him all the best."
Anne V went on to say, "But I won't miss holding in a queef FOR MY LIFE every time his stupid ass pulls out really fast."
Even though Anne V is the epitome of grace and demureness (Exhibit: EVERYTHING), she can not compete with the true holder of Adam Levine's heart:
Oh yes, that's Blake Shelton saying "He doesn't pull out with me, hunty!" with his eyes and pucker. So try not to fall over in shock when Blake eventually announces he's quitting his wife Miranda Lambert. Although, Blake should divorce Miranda for the sole fact that she has huge chunky lowlights in her hair and the year is not 2001.
Here's Blake dreaming of Adam while giving his trophy a dry handy at the Country Music Awards last night.
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Submitted by louise_brooks on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:33pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:22pm.
Submitted by louise_brooks on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:12pm.
Submitted by The Real Mimi on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:08pm.
Force the doors open and jump down the shaft.
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Hmmm, I never thought of THAT! That my dear is BRILLIANT!!
*blush* You just like that I said shaft.
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Well I can't believe you'd think that I would be so sha............ok, you're right who am I trying to kid!! lol:)
I think his tattoos are sexy, too. He's a douche of the highest order and I hate to admit it, but I would probably hate fuck him. I'd hate myself afterwards and never admit I was with him.
who the fuck cares enough that they have to issue a statement? he's a colossal douchebag and she probably hates his slimeball ass.
Ophelia! Now I need to see that!
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:22pm.
Submitted by louise_brooks on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:12pm.
Submitted by The Real Mimi on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:08pm.
Force the doors open and jump down the shaft.
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Hmmm, I never thought of THAT! That my dear is BRILLIANT!!
*blush* You just like that I said shaft.
Yeah, so much for that "most stable relationship in my life" bullshit.
I find Blake AND Miranda really unattractive. They look alike and have weird scruntchy faces.
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Douchechill!
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:25pm.
The full sleeve tats are hot to me. Especially when they have nice art on them, not crap.
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nice! I was beginning to think I was the only one on here. Levine's are really nice artwork...I'm a sucker for Japanese screen printy type things.
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It thought furrsurr MK would post the pic of Blake making fun of Taylor not so Swift's suprised reaction to winning her gazillionth award.
Submitted by Chirio on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:27pm.
...I've told all my ex's "Imma put you in the fuck off folder of my life"
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LMMFAO...how very true. This could be a new reality tv show Chirio "The Fuck Off Folders Of My Life"
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:27pm.
Submitted by The Real Mimi on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:08pm.
If you were stuck in an elevator for hours and you were forced to listen the whole time to either Maroon 5 or Nickelback, which one would you choose?
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Well if that Moves Like Jagger song is in the M5 rotation, then I will have to puncture my ear drums with a pen from my purse ,because I could take the pain from that easier than listening to either abomination of M5 or 5back.
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Is jumping down the elevator shaft an option?
I guess I'd go with Nickleback.
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She probably hates him, but wants to look good and sweet.
And who the fuck cares so much, that they have to put out a statement?
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Heaven can wait
And all the gods come down here just to sing for me
And the melody's gonna make me fly
Without pain, without fear
AGREED on Blake's appeal and hotness! I'm even digging his tatoo...if I could only figure out what the frick it is.
It reminds me of that commercial of someone watching T.V. and a roach goes scurrying across the screen...and YES, I (amongst scores of others) swatted at the screen. His tat doesn't look celtic or war-ish. It looks like a barbed wire fence with bugs (or grenades) inside.
*passes Snowy industrial drum of wet wipes, gets back in line again.
Submitted by The Real Mimi on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:08pm.
If you were stuck in an elevator for hours and you were forced to listen the whole time to either Maroon 5 or Nickelback, which one would you choose?
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Well if that Moves Like Jagger song is in the M5 rotation, then I will have to puncture my ear drums with a pen from my purse ,because I could take the pain from that easier than listening to either abomination of M5 or 5back.
all these celebs always write the same sh(t " We still love and respect each other as friends"
yeahhhhhhhhh sure. I've told all my ex's "Imma put you in the fuck off folder of my life"
Coma Caca!
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The full sleeve tats are hot to me. Especially when they have nice art on them, not crap.
Oh look. It's bring your kids to the office day.
*rolls eyes*
are those tats meant to make him more hardcore? so it can distract from his david beckham voice?
Actchually liked Maroon 5's early stuff.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
*still doesn't give a shit*
Submitted by louise_brooks on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:12pm.
Submitted by The Real Mimi on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:08pm.
Force the doors open and jump down the shaft.
===============================================
Hmmm, I never thought of THAT! That my dear is BRILLIANT!!
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 12:54pm.
BLAKE SHELTON CAN LEAVE IT IN, CUM ON MY FACE, WHATEVER HIS BIG OLE HEART DESIRES!!!!!
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wow you are really worked up lol
LOL guest
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
Submitted by The Real Mimi on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:08pm.
If you were stuck in an elevator for hours and you were forced to listen the whole time to either Maroon 5 or Nickelback, which one would you choose?
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i would bang my head against the door until i pass out.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:12pm.
LMAO!
That's the celeb breakup statement I want to see.
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 12:54pm.
BLAKE SHELTON CAN LEAVE IT IN, CUM ON MY FACE, WHATEVER HIS BIG OLE HEART DESIRES!!!!!
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snowpiece,
I just checked my schedule and I have the whole afternoon free.
Submitted by The Real Mimi on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:08pm.
If you were stuck in an elevator for hours and you were forced to listen the whole time to either Maroon 5 or Nickelback, which one would you choose?
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Very interesting Mimi!!!
I would have to say Maroon 5 because my hate for all things Nickelbunk holds no bounds. I just CAN'T with NB I've really tried but I fucking HATE them!!!
*takes the stairs*
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Both Blake and Miranda look like the type to be married 6 or 7 times before the last "he/she done me wrong (twang, twang, twang)" song is written.
LOL *molests all my Blakes*
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
Submitted by The Real Mimi on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:08pm.
If you were stuck in an elevator for hours and you were forced to listen the whole time to either Maroon 5 or Nickelback, which one would you choose?
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TRICK QUESTION!!!!*REPORTED*
arghhh....coin toss...I call "pull-em out" heads for M5, after which I'd need an AK-47 to put my ear drums out of their misery.
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 12:54pm.
by jack-n-the-hat on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 12:54pm.
ETA: *changes name to Blake Shelton
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*Realizes why he's always liked Snowy...Changes name to Blake Shelton TOO!*
For some reason I love Miranda even though she looks like the hillbilly love child of Taylor Momsen and Taylor Swift, and she can't sing worth a damn either. But she'd probably set Blake on fire if he crossed her, and I like that in a woman.
Submitted by The Real Mimi on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:08pm.
If you were stuck in an elevator for hours and you were forced to listen the whole time to either Maroon 5 or Nickelback, which one would you choose?
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Is Michael Bolton not an option?
LOL weezy!!
"She walked in on her sister giving me a blowjob... I said HOLD UP baby, wuddn't me! So basically she dumped my ass over nothin... bitches be crazy y'all!"
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"You reap what you fuck." ~ RichBitch 03/13/2012
Submitted by The Real Mimi on Mon, 04/02/2012 - 1:08pm.
Force the doors open and jump down the shaft.
If you were stuck in an elevator for hours and you were forced to listen the whole time to either Maroon 5 or Nickelback, which one would you choose?
FINE-ally, we can "moves like jagger" all over this.
*although, he's got serious owl face in his modeling shoot*
I'm equally attracted and repulsed by him...as for Blake...I would do him every day of the week!
adam's thighs and anna's thighs look like they're about the same size...i'm turned off...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
I like Miranda Lambert but YES to the lowlights comment. I feel like I've seen more than one blonde with the chunky lowlights lately and I hate it!!! It didn't look good ten years ago and it still doesn't!!!
As for this other trick....I have no idea who she is other than the girl who wore the Slut Dress' slutty cousin.
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"Hooooooty who give an eff about Haiti?! I don't! BAM!" - MK as Taylor Momsen
Unlike most, I actually like Levine and Maroon 5, however, those tattoos are just awful.
He's like a skinnier John Mayer so this only person this is surprising to is Anne.
Just once I would like a celeb to release a statement that says, "You know what? FUCK HIM! That guy fucked anything with a faint heartbeat that stood still! I'm pretty sure he fucked my aunt. Ladies, if you see him- RUN!!! Run like a the citizens of Tokyo fleeing Godzilla! He is AWFUL!"
Well, at least they have that weird ass picture to remember the good times with.
Oh well, not surprising to hear. I hate Maroon 5 and his whiny voice but those tats are the sex.
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Snowho! LOL.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
miz, yeah , he said it in an interview recently
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
Rotfllmao @ this post.
Mama Bear...wasn't that the JSimp order of things...Adam then Mayer. Swear that auto correct just changed Mayer to nausea. Lol. So true.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Sounds like she dumped his ass...
ETA: *changes name to Blake Shelton*
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"You reap what you fuck." ~ RichBitch 03/13/2012
BLAKE SHELTON CAN LEAVE IT IN, CUM ON MY FACE, WHATEVER HIS BIG OLE HEART DESIRES!!!!!
***************************
"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky