Damn, Laurie! What Happened?

April 1, 2012 / Posted by:

Lisa Robin Kelly, better known as Laurie #1 on That ’70s Show, found her ratty tatty ass in front of a mug shot camera yet again after she allegedly Ike Turnered her man. TMZ says that the L.A. County Sheriff’s Department arrested Lisa Robin at around 12:50 this morning for felony spousal abuse. Lisa Robin is currently sitting in a jail cell and waiting for someone, anyone (I’m looking at you, Eric) to pay her $50,000 bail.

Lisa Robin Kelly is (allegedly) in the wrong for (allegedly) scrappin’ on her man, but the cops should be charged with cruel and unusual punishment for putting ole’ girl in front of a mug shot camera with her brows telling conflicting stories. Lisa’s right brow is saying “GUILTY!!” and her left brow is saying “NOT GUILTY!!!” Or maybe her left brow is saying, “Help me! Half of me was blown up in a meth lab explosion and I’m afraid she’s going to finish me off!” I have a hard time reading brows in distress.

Yes, even if they allowed Lisa Robin to restore her left brow, she’d still look like Smeagol Goldie Hawn (or the meth baby of Rodney Dangerfield and Nicole Richie), but they should’ve given her a chance. It’s hard to put your best mug shot beauty face forward when your left brow looks like a literal poop noodle. This is why every earthquake kit, First Aid kit and emergency kit should have a brow pencil in it. Brows are not a privilege, they’re a right! Shame on the LAPD for doing this to a ho.

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