Hot Slut Of The Day!
By popular demand and 4 days late, I bring you the new pride of Alberta (sorry, Nickelback, you had a good run) Robert Wilkinson who has been sweetly serenading the Internet and beyond ever since the video of him doing a spot-on Freddie Mercury impersonation in the back of a police car went viral. (Note: Dlisted does not condone driving drunk as shit, which is what this Canadian Idol was busted for. If you're too drunk to drive, please use your iPhone or borrow someone else's to find a sober designated driving trick on Craigslist who will gladly and safely drive you to your destination in exchange for some road head and a ball tickle. That's how responsible drunk sluts do it.)
If you're like me, then you're probably a little sad that you didn't win Mega Millions (Fuck you, Kansas! Fuck you, Illinois! Fuck you, Maryland!) and your dream of buying CNN to turn it into ACNN (The Anderson Cooper Nekkid Network) is dead. But look on the bright side, if you won that shit, you wouldn't be in front of your computer right now watching this slow clap-worthy performance for the 500th time. You'd be at your office, writing your resignation letter on a roll of toilet paper with your dirty asshole. See, there's a silver lining to being a broke and unlucky.
And when you're outside today and a tear drop-shaped piece of silver glitter lands on your cheek, know that's from Freddie Mercury crying tears of joys from heaven because his legacy is living on (and them some) in Alberta, Canada.
“Physical violence is the least of my priorities.” - the Pride of Alberta
via Everywhere (Thanks to everyone who sent this in)
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Submitted by mefunigirl on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 2:20pm.
I sang along.
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Me too. Sober.
My son saw this, he's more upset with that fact that they share the same nane! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Between this and the Boobie Bus, Alberta's Hot Sluts are finally being recognized on the world stage!! LOL.
Thanks for posting the Danielle Smith/Wildrose Bus story, MK!!
drunk as a skunk LMAO I want that for a ringtone!! :)
It's not fake. I live in this town!
Submitted by kiwikim on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 6:21pm.
Do you think Anderson Cooper knows about MK's crush on him?
^^^^^^^
Fer sure.
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"Physical violence is the least of my priorities" - Drunken Albertan
About the stupidest thing I have ever done while drunk was propose to an ex-GF YEARS ago.
She actually took me seriously as we were partying and I said, "hey want to get married" while doing watermelon shots.
We broke up shortly after that.
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"Going to Burger King to eat healthy is like going to a prostitute for a hug." Dlister Supah 8.20.11
I'm all set, between this clip and the awesome recorder video in the Titanic thread
Do you think Anderson Cooper knows about MK's crush on him?
Submitted by BaconSlut on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 5:16pm.
Speaking of grooving to Queen while in a car:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=huI1nL5HWQQ
You're welcome.
Bwahahahahahaha!
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"I prefer my pieces the same way I prefer my Slim Jims, long, lean and mute" --the incomparable MK
That was brilliant. I wasn't expecting him to sing the whole song. LOL
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"I prefer my pieces the same way I prefer my Slim Jims, long, lean and mute" --the incomparable MK
Speaking of grooving to Queen while in a car:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=huI1nL5HWQQ
You're welcome.
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"Uh, hello, room service? I'd like some bacon, a couple of Cokes, and a bunch of whores." -Butthead, of Beavis and Butthead
That's probably what it sounds and looks like inside everyone's car when they're alone and a Queen song comes on.
LOL Drunks!
i expected better things for casey abrams. tsk tsk.
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"The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing."
~Edmund Burke
*peddles off in a mint '88 yugo*
is that paul rudd?
hell to the YEAH!
Blueyz wrote:
NUMBER TWO - He was arrested for public intoxication, not DRUNK DRIVING. HUGE difference.
Actually, the original video of this shows him swerving down the street in his vehicle. He was arrested for drunk driving. This is the second time he's been arrested for drunk driving. He's very well known to police in town, which is probably why he wasn't cuffed.
Submitted by Hekki on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 2:37pm.
{Not to be a wet blanket but I have no patience for drunks anymore.}
With you on this. It's like dealing with spastic children in adult (scarier) size. Not fun.
I can't believe Canadians don't cuff drunks! Yikes. At least this one was just an American Idol wannabe.
Not to be a wet blanket but I have no patience for drunks anymore.
Who says we're not at our best when we're drunk? That was hilarious. I love that the cops just let him finish his back-seat performance.
Not fake. Cops here are only supposed to cuff if it's necessary.
I sang along.
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And little one, hold out for a c-section. You don't want to slide down that. ~ Sweetas
Thanks Blueyz - I thought that might be the case.
NUMBER ONE - Not a fake, it is bonefide (check police blotter) - this is Canada, he was not handcuffed, yes, they do that here. He was locked in the back, what would he need to be handcuffed for?
NUMBER TWO - He was arrested for public intoxication, not DRUNK DRIVING. HUGE difference.
You're welcome.
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Dear Santa,
Please define naughty...
That was awesome, especially the RCMP ending. There is a choir in Alberta that needs this guy because he stayed remarkably on pitch throughout and that is not easy. In the future he should park first!
Yeah, maybe he's a Golden Voice when sober? It could be a fake arrest but I still think he's intoxicated though.
Submitted by Emeriesan on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 1:34pm.
{LOLz. He's more on key than some sober X Factor contestants.}
Ha-ha! Makes you wonder what he sounds like when he sings sober?
LOLz. He's more on key than some sober X Factor contestants.
Submitted by poshjosh on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 1:32pm.
{FAKE!!!! He's not handcuffed in the back of the police car, which is rule number one for cops.}
Good call. I totally got suckered in by this one.
Submitted by BangoSkank on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 12:50pm.
Thanks MK! I had a feeling this dude would be a hot slut! Love this fuckin' guy. My favorite is at the end (see quote below)!
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"Physical violence is the least of my priorities."
^^^^^^
Uhhhhh....
Submitted by betseyfan2 on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 12:33pm.
I'm claiming the tag, "Physical Violence is the least of my priorities."
FAKE!!!! He's not handcuffed in the back of the police car, which is rule number one for cops.
LOVE this guy and his tribute to Freddie. <3 I am still a broke bitch too. I won $2 though. Woop!
www.poopreport.com :)
<3-------------------------------<3
RIMADYL KILLS
Oh sweet lawd. I've seen people this drunk at parties and it is SCARY.
I remember this one guy lost his shit and started yelling and freaking out and making a huge ruckus and this cute blonde calmed him down and told him his mother loved him and that he was special (basically, she was a drunk whisperer) and he finally calmed down and curled into a fetal position crying and then, amazingly they both started kissing. That was scary because everyone thought he was going to tear the house apart and the police would have to get involved.
I honestly don't know how law enforcement officers can muster the sheer will and patience to deal with drunks and druggies because inebriated people are so unpredictable and can flip out on you at any time. Talk about an adrenaline rush to always be dealing with pure insanity.
Submitted by mike on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 1:03pm.
Submitted by joe shmoe on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 1:01pm.
I couldn't be a cop. I'd kill someone.
Word. I just don't have the patience for peoples' bullshit.
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That's what the tazer is for!
;)
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I didn't even know about that Mega Millions thing and I could've wasted money right around the corner. I had friends in Brazil e-mailing me to buy them tickets yesterday morning that I opened after the #s were drawn. Sorry gang.
As far as drunken karaoke goes, Bohemian Rhapsody is one of the better choices. It could've been worse...like "Don't Stop Believin" or "Livin on a Prayer."
(shudders)
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Galileooooo! galileoooo! GALILEOOOOOO! Bam, bam, ba BAAAAA!
True hot slut material. Hilarious.
Submitted by mike on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 1:03pm.
Submitted by joe shmoe on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 1:01pm.
I couldn't be a cop. I'd kill someone.
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Word. I just don't have the patience for peoples' bullshit.
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*hurls self under bandwagon*
Me three. I think I could - just - restrain myself from killing someone. Probably. My problem is that I would be the crookedest cop evah. I can't be trusted with that level of power.
I guess they figured he would be easier to handle after the song.
I'd hit it.
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The man's as gay as a picnic basket.
That really is the sweet spot of drunkness. I can't imagine being so drunk that I'd get arrested but not so drunk I can't sing Bohemian Rhapsody in in its entirety.
Also, the little PSA about drunk driving annoyed me. Anyone who pays attention to that already thinks drunk driving is a bad thing.
Submitted by mike on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 1:03pm.
Submitted by joe shmoe on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 1:01pm.
I couldn't be a cop. I'd kill someone.
Word. I just don't have the patience for peoples' bullshit.
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Then take it from me - NEVER get a job in healthcare.
"Shalikla!"
This has got to be fake. Otherwise - if I was the cop - by a minute in I'd be telling this hipster douchebag to SHUT THE FUCK UP! ________________________________________________
"I like to dissect girls. Did you know I'm utterly insane?" - Patrick Bateman
He needed to be shot and put out of his misery.
Fair is foul and foul is fair..
LOL MK, I wonder if the Mountie didn't drive the longest way to the station just to let him finish his DRANK serenade. He was totally planning it from the start... *inserts Wayne's World headshakes* ;D
“Physical violence is the least of my priorities.” - the Pride of Alberta = perfect! hahahahha
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"Ayúdame, no puedo!" - MK
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Submitted by joe shmoe on Sat, 03/31/2012 - 1:01pm.
I couldn't be a cop. I'd kill someone.
Word. I just don't have the patience for peoples' bullshit.
There isn't much else to do in Edson but drink.
I couldn't be a cop. I'd kill someone.
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