Would You Hit It?
When I first read the headline earlier that said James Franco's character in the feature film version of TruTV's Party Heat called Spring Breakers was based on Riff Raff, I was so pissed to learn that the Riff Raff his character is based on is not this Riff Raff:
It's the other OTHER Riff Raff who was on Vh1's From G's to Gents. The real Riff Raff is bragging to everyone that Harmony Korine offered him the role, but he couldn't take it since he was too busy working out of the country (aka working three shifts in a row in the stock room of a Pier 1 knock-off store in Ohio called Out of the Country). So James Franco took the role and is shooting this movie in between taking Polaroid pictures of squirrel urethras for his art school thesis and executive producing a Nickelodeon show based around a family of turnips.
When I look at James Franco in this mess, I don't see the "rapper" Riff Raff. I see the Rocky Horror Riff Raff (I'm trying to cover all the Riff Raffs in one post) after injecting himself with the essence of Gary Oldman's True Romance character and gaining 90 pounds by cutting his meth with Bisquick to play a KFed impersonator in a Cash4Gold commercial. Franco is nailing it!
Who knew that James Franco could pull off the "middle-class suburban douche trying to seem street by telling everyone that he was raised in the projects of Detroit" look so well? And to answer my headline question, yes, I'd hit it just to watch those A cups bounce. I bet James Franco's peen tastes like sour milk and his jizz has the consistency of cottage cheese, so I better bring a can of peaches.
And let's just pretend that the yellow-weaved beauty in the blue bathing suit is Hottie from Flavor of Love. I mean, she kind of looks like Beyonce.
• 
*makes disgusted face* So.Much.Stankiness.
Oh and guuurlfriend in the blue bathingsuit? When your poooch is hanging out the hole in the front...that's a fashion don't. So are the tats and the ratty blonde hair. *judges you*
im sorry but i would so hit it.
He's got some major boobage going on there. He's definitely an A cup.
What in 90's hell is this???
Would I hit it? Yes. With a family-sized can of RAID.
****************************************************
"Uh, hello, room service? I'd like some bacon, a couple of Cokes, and a bunch of whores." -Butthead, of Beavis and Butthead
Oh, hi there Miss Green Bikini. I guess mom is looking after the rugrat this afternoon? Yeah, okay, I'm gonna go bang your friend here. Ciao.
--------------------------------------------------
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Thu, 01/19/2012 - 11:56am.
Liver spotted hand
Groping while I cry inside
Merit badge and meth
Oh, James Franco is so edgy, he's an Ivy-leaguer, such range, so deep, etc.
*pukes*
Riff Raff from Underdog woulda been better.
-------------------------------------
Aniston is artistically, intellectually and reproductively barren.
Paltrow is every argument against nepotism rolled into one.
Yeah, he sort of got photo bombed in that pic.