Hot Slut Of The Day!

March 26, 2012 / Posted by:

This year’s Susan Boyle from Britain’s Got Talent who’s built like Hurley from Lost and has got a voice like a Pavarotti fart was going to get the Hot Slut stamp of approval this morning until I came across a greater talent whose voice makes my ears cry in a different kind of way. Directly from your memaw’s favorite show America’s Funniest Home Videos (via Reddit) comes Cody, a dog with an adorable face you just want to pet and a soul-killing howl that’ll make you want to pick up the phone to call 911 since he sounds like Sam Kinison getting fucked in the peen slit with a freshly lit match while being forced to look at nudes of Ke$hit. This is what it sounds like when souls cry (and what it sounds like when Jessica Simpson discovers that her chef tried to sneak broccoli into her Slutty Brownie and what it sounds like when a man wakes up next to White Oprah in the morning.)

As much as I think Cody is a fluffy ball of adorable, I’d never have a dog like him. If you’re ever dying a slow painful death in your apartment, your neighbors would never call the police, because they’d think it was just Cody howling for a treat again.

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