Blind Items: I Guess, You Guess
Both are acclaimed actors. One’s an actor you find super cute. He’s popular and adorable, like dimples and old fashioned dresses. The other’s an actor I find super gross. And dramatic. And full of his own shit. He fronts like he’s dark. He’s difficult. The work is often beneath him. The work is often taken away from him because the attitude that it is beneath him is so often intolerable The two had a torrid affair. Which is nothing unusual, of course not. Except that dimples broke up with drama and drama practically had a psychotic break. There was a month-long spiral. A couple of times he came close to really hurting himself. He also threatened to expose them both, though no one is taking that seriously. As a result, his heartbreaker is trying, ignorantly, to go back to the other side of his bisexuality. (Lainey Gossip)
The only acclaimed actor I find "super" cute is Michael Fucking Nouri and he's about as adorable as a cum puddle in a dimple and an old fashioned dress crumpled up on the floor of the $15-an-hour motel he rented for you and him to fuck in before planning the murder of your husband (No, I can't let go of All My Children's cancellation). What I'm getting at is that Michael Fucking Nouri is SUPER adorable, so it's not him.But the actor your ass might find super cute is probably Jake Gyllenhaal. I know how you pinched your nipples during Prince of Persia. Although, that had nothing to do with Jake. You pinched your nipples, because that might was so damn bad and you needed to do something to pass the time.
Anyway, I'll say that "Dimples" is Jakey? I'll say that "Drama" is James Franco, because if there's a bitch who wants the world to think he's "dramatic and dark" it's James Franco.
This does make sense, though. Have you been to James Franco's Tumblr lately? The signs are all there. Bitch keeps posting a picture of this creepy ugly American Girl doll with bunny teeth, thirsty hair, cheap fake eyelashes and busted bangs. It's like he's saying to Jake: "LOOK HOW TORN UP OUR DAUGHTER IS. WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO HER? TO US?!" And this picture of James with a cookie is his way of saying to Jake: "You'll never chew on this sweet, dingle-ridden treat again!"
This D list (Z list?) former child star is currently in the process of starting his own religion. He’s claiming to have visions and knows when the end of the world is. He currently has about five followers. (BuzzFoto)
I wish the "he" was a "she" and I wish the "she" was Kimmy Gibler! I'd drop everything to join the Kimmy Gibler cult. We'd pray to the eternal scrunchie all day. But this is obviously Kirk Cameron and his five followers are only there for the foot longs.
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I thought Gordon-Levitt for cute guy too (I certainly think he's adorable ).
They're both supposed to be "acclaimed actors" (which I take to mean critically acclaimed), so that excludes many of the guesses here. Michael Pitt is a good guess for drama guy.
MK is right about Prince of Persia! I made the mistake of leaving it on the boob tube when it came on Encore this month. Jakey's spray on tan kept molting. I didn't understand why CGI couldn't fix that with his British accent. He must of hung out with American Iranians for his "method acting" because he had that stilted way of speaking that happens when they get here after being taught English by British teachers in Iran.
Onto the guesses, I say the "dark guy" is the Garfield guy from the new Spiderman franchise. Lainey is always calling him "dark."
Number 2 is Corey Feldman.
Emile and Joaquin
Someone at Lainey suggested Zac Efron and Leo Dicaprio and I would believe that.
-Leo has long been rumored to be bisexual or gay (particularly in his New York days)
-Leo's polarizing and almost obnoxiously disinterested in his persona which some find revolting.
-Zac Efron is definitely "popular" and "cute" in a superficial way.
-Leo reached out to Zac Efron and they've had a bromance ever since
- Both Zac Efron and Leo Dicaprio always have extremely transparent, gimmicky girlfriends or publicity stunts. Dating Lily Collins who happens to be the next big thing (for whatever reason)? Models who clam up at mention of Leo? Dropping a condom on a red carpet? Trying to make Blake Lively's career (and failing)?
Lainey already notted James Franco so that blind is not about him. Anyway, James has a girlfriend but she's not a celeb.
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 12:24pm.
Three of my FB friends "like" Kirk Cameron. Ew.
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This is enough reason to leave Facebook.
I hope Billy Mumy is the religious leader. Clint Howard would be good, too. Remember he was "The boy who predicted earthquakes," in a Twilight Zone episode I think is as good as the one where people are wished "into the cornfield."
Didn't Mario Lopez wear a dress in Saved by the Bell once?
Thank you, that is all
#1 Orlando Bloom & Viggo Mortensen
the BI did not say sexy muthafucker, so no, it is not Viggo
i'm going to take an, ahem, darker point of view and throw out Tyler Perry and Terrance Howard for #1.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Tyler Perry is a very good guess but can't see Terrence Howard as being down low. He's a straight a-hole.
I read laineys liveblog yesterday and she it wasnt jake g or james franco..so my guess would be JGL
I lurk here regularly but never posted. I've been waiting to hear what people thought about Lainey's blind. She ruled out a number of people in her Hunger Games liveblog yesterday. Among them were Jakey G and James Franco. I was thinking Emile Hirsch for drama but had no idea about dimples. Wondering if JGL and Emile have any connections...I guess being surreptitious would work, though, as it seems to be the name of the game for the closeted in Hollywood. And I wouldn't mind if JGL was bi, b/c I could still have a "chance" in my fantasies.
the two actors are Willem Dafoe and Keanu Reaves.
the child-actor is Billy Mumy.
James Franco is goofy not dark...
but hell to the yeah, I would join Krazy Kirk's Krishtian Kult for a free sammich....more than what most religions give you, but I would quit the cult after lunch...sign up again for dinner, quit then sign up again for lunch...
I have had some sucky birthdays but Kirk Cameron's looks like the worse! That picture should be in the DLISTED Hall of Fame...guaranteed for laughs for years to come!!
There should be one day where just famous people...athletes, movie stars, singers, etc. come out of the closet together and be done with it. There would be so many that no one would be able to keep track anyway. It's really not 'shocking' news.
www.poopreport.com :)
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RIMADYL KILLS
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 10:47am.
Well, I saw him in an old episode of Murder She Wrote. He was maybe 12. But since he's best known for his adult career, I doubt it's him.
Plus, after that clusterfucky hoax he pulled a few years back, I doubt anyone would take him seriously as a religious figure.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
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Lmao...that footlong picture is one of the saddest pictures I've ever seen.
www.poopreport.com :)
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RIMADYL KILLS
The first person I thought was Joseph Gordon Levitt (Dimples). James Franco seems spot on though.
Along the lines of Joseph Gordon-Levitt and having dimples, the odd association of 'old-fashioned dresses' could refer to his work/friendship with Zooey Deschanel?
Maybe the "old-fashioned dresses" thing refers to Jake dating Taylor Swift since she always wears stuff like that??? I don't know. I'm a flight attendant and had JGL on one of my flights and I he was pretty darn adorable. Very short though and a but weird but nice.
Lainey already eliminated James Franco and Jake Gyllenhaal as guesses for that blind on her liveblog yesterday. She also eliminated Eddie Redmayne.
I think though that Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and either Emile Hirshe or Michael Pitt sound like really good guesses.
Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 10:50am.
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 10:47am.
Joaquin was nominated for an academy award as an adult so I doubt he is the child star in question. It has to be someone obscure like Boner from Growing Pains...or the little Ricky kid from Family Matters.
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Boner took his own life a couple of years ago. MK wrote about it here of course, because... the guy's name was Boner, after all!
I guess JGL and Emile Hirsch for the first one. Lainey has written before about Emile being annoying, and old-fashioned dresses could be like... I dunno, something something hipsters.
Submitted by TrashyWilma on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 12:29pm.
Joseph Gordon-Levitt is fucking adorable, loved and has dimples.
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I love him. Just watched 50/50 the other night and he was great.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
DIMPLES = Gyllenhaal OR Franco. I'd say Franco based on the fact he spent time at NYU (Pitt resides in Brooklyn) but the "Acclaimed Actor" is throwin' me, 127 Hours I guess.....
DRAMA = Michael Pitt no doubt. Hella difficult and reported/suspected bi-guy. Dude had his agent quit on him last October and later fired from Boardwalk Empire for being an ultra-prick is what I hear.
Joseph Gordon-Levitt is fucking adorable, loved and has dimples. I figured him for straight up gay, but bisexuality gives me a small chance. YES!!!
Hasn't just about everyone experienced an embarrassing/regrettable meltdown over a broken relationship?
"Shalikla!"
Three of my FB friends "like" Kirk Cameron. Ew.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
Ooh I hope the last one is Taran whats-his-name, the youngest kid from "Home Improvement" - he used to be married to a woman like 25 or 30 years older than he is and is a spacey vegan hippyish type.
Dunno about the first two gheys though - could be anyone!
Submitted by ba-buttons on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 11:12am.
Okay, that is really sad but I LOL'd because I read that in the family guy voice.
I say you - he dead. LOL.
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#KONY2012 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4MnpzG5Sqc
Please watch, learn and share. 2012 is the year.
Joseph Gordon Levitt for dimples. Cosign on Emile Hersh for Drama.
One of the participants in the first one could be Emile Hirsch.
Is James Franco considered dark and difficult? I thought he was just pretentious.
He does goofy shit. Someone had a link to that Natalie Wood commercial of his and that was too stoopid to consider dark. like the muppets doing a remake of psycho.
Hey wait. Muppet remakes should be the only kind allowed from now on.
*chanting as always*
Shut the fuck up kid, you're in my closet now.
LOL Uvy, no doubt his wife and poor children would make up the minimum requirement for membership to this new ministry haha.
But really good guesses from others if it's not him! We'll have to see what floats up to the surface from this bunch!
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"... looking in her face is heaven for all the youth and hope and good will." Thamar 03/01/2012 ☺♪☼♫ ░░░░
At least James Franco didn't have an affair with a Trollson. You can credit him with that much taste.
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 11:12am.
Has James France EVER been linked to a gf?! I never hear anything about his love life gay or straight.
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He was with Marla Sokoloff for several years.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
I'm goin' with Aaron Eckhart & Sean Penn. Or maybe James Marsden & Jeremy Piven.
Has James France EVER been linked to a gf?! I never hear anything about his love life gay or straight.
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Douchechill!
Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 10:50am.
Joaquin was nominated for an academy award as an adult so I doubt he is the child star in question. It has to be someone obscure like Boner from Growing Pains...or the little Ricky kid from Family Matters.
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Can't be Boner. He dead.
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Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Thu, 01/19/2012 - 11:56am.
Liver spotted hand
Groping while I cry inside
Merit badge and meth
Whoever wrote the first one needs to go back to school.
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 10:35am.
Hahaha UVY!!
True, MJT. Plus they probably would have said acting family.
Willie Aames is a good guess too.
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Submitted by Datura on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 10:59am.
Would the world really be angered and devastated if Jake or James came out? Neither of them are teen heart-throbs anymore; they've both got critical clout. I don't see the reason for these elaborate shows of heterosexuality.
Yes! Thank you. Or [200 other closeted celebs].
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Please: It's "rahnday."
Would the world really be angered and devastated if Jake or James came out? Neither of them are teen heart-throbs anymore; they've both got critical clout. I don't see the reason for these elaborate shows of heterosexuality.
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“he looks like some sort of sea serpent like an octopus, catfish or something from pirates of the caribbean and his stomach is gross it looks like hes prego with a giant wiener” – kittymuffin
I know Lainey abhors Emile Hirsch for being up his own ass and being difficult. Not sure he's "acclaimed". Same with "cute" Zac Efron.
Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 10:44am.
#1 scream Joaquin Phoenix to me. Who the cute dimple actor is I have no idea. Jakey G?
And what does this mean "and old fashioned dresses" Is he a cross dresser? *blondeface*
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I wasn't sure what to make of that "dresses" thing either.
As annoying as I find her, I used to like Lainey's blinds because they were juicy, she'd throw in obvious clues, and eventually do subtle "reveals" in the articles on her site. Now her blinds are just vague and blah.
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“he looks like some sort of sea serpent like an octopus, catfish or something from pirates of the caribbean and his stomach is gross it looks like hes prego with a giant wiener” – kittymuffin
How come everyone is gettin' laid except me?
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makes me wanna email him offering to be his "sugar momma cougar beard"
For the last BI I'll throw in Willy Aames (?) of Charles in Charge since he was all super religious and even played Bible Man before his divorce and downward spiral.
Also, maybe Danny Bonaduce - the church of douche?
Jake and James Franco would be hot together.
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"Brows should not look like a condiment!" -MK