SWEEEEEEEEEETIE, Kim Zolciak Is Knocked Up Again!
The rent is due on Kim Zolciak’s new multi-million dollar mansion and so here she is proudly showing off her dollar sign fetus in this week’s Life & Style. The wig-wearing Silicone whore walrus of The Real Trashwives of Atlanta birthed out her son Kroy Jagger ten months ago, but the AA batteries on her relevancy clock are almost drained, so she’s pushing out another one while she can still collect a check from L&S. 33-year-old (HA!) Kim is four months pregnant and says that she and her husband Kroy Biermann completely planned this:
“Kroy and I are so excited. To decide we wanted to get pregnant again and have it happen so quickly was such a blessing.
People are going to be shocked, because nobody knows. I’m so excited that KJ will have a little buddy.”
That means we’re living in a world where a Kuntrashian, Snooki and Kim Zolciak are all carrying spawns at the same time. The celebrity money baby trifecta is complete and the world’s power has shifted to the Illuminati. We’re now asshole deep in the Fame Whore Age and it’s only going to get darker. Don’t believe me? Let me remind you of what happened the last time Kim was knocked up with a baby who is now being raised by nannies and reality show producers:
Not today. Not ever.