Jay-Z's Mama, Beyonce And A Plastic Gremlin Come Out For Obama
On the left is Gloria Carter, a woman who is letting nature happen to her face. In the middle is Beyonce, a woman who officially owns the trademark for the color blue (which is why if you're wearing blue™, you should find a lawsuit from her team of lawyers in your lap in 3..2..it's there) and a woman who looks absolutely beautiful for someone who carried a temper-pedic baby pillow for 9 WHOLE months! And on the right is the latest eliminated Mogwai from Gizmo's Drag Race. The hell kind of gremlin trickery did Mama Tina do to her face? I know your instinct is to throw water at her, but don't or she'll multiply!
Mama Tina's cheeks look like they're pregnant with two throbbing demon seeds. Mama Tina's eyebrows look like the hairy horns of Satan that were thrown on her face to terrorize us on earth. Mama Tina's whole face looks like it's possessed by the blood (aka Botox) of Jocelyn Wildenstein.
Mama Tina slithered out of her Lair of Dereon last night to join Gloria Carter, Beyonce and Basement Baby at an Obama re-election fundraiser in NYC last night. Inviting Mama Tina to a re-election fundraiser is the smartest move Michelle Obama has ever made.
As soon as Mama Tina appeared at the entrance to the party in a cloud of smoke, every bitch dropped their purse on the floor and ran for their lives! With just the lift of one brow, Mama Tina can steal your voice, poison your food and give you the feeling that her minions are snatching your children out of their beds to put them to work in the House of Dereon sweat shop. Drop all your worldly possessions and save your children!
After Basement Baby tallied up all the dropped wallets, purses, wigs, jewelry and watches she picked up off the floor, she declared that they set a new fundraising record. You're a mean (and genius) one, Mama Tina.
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http://www.tmz.com/2012/03/20/beyonce-post-baby-body/#.T2ijlNn4InY
read the last line.....I think they are slamming her?
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Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead
Blue doesn't suit her.
Solange tries so hard to be the anti-Beyonce that it's pathetic because it's so calculated and contrived.
BRIGHT LIGHT! BRIGHT LIGHT!
I appreciate that Solange is rocking her natural hair, but the length just doesn't work on her. Looks like a hairball that popped-off MogwaiTina's back.
Ctfu
Miss Tina looks more manly than Jay Zzzz's mom & that's sayin sumpin.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
I don't understand why celebrities think they're actually helping presidential images by supporting them, especially if those prezzes criticize the rich.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
HAHAHA Her Mogwai ears are hidden here by all the luxurious hair!
Whamo, 50 tons of foundation in the wrong shade can give you that waxy ashen look! Maybe it's from their make-up line (if it exists) otherwise spackle! ;D
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"... looking in her face is heaven for all the youth and hope and good will." Thamar 03/01/2012 ☺♪☼♫ ░░░░
When Mama Knowles got matching noses with Beyonce years ago, I refrained from comment because she had not gone overboard. But now.
But NOW?
Hometrick needs to S T O P! Those cheeks could cut diamonds. She's trying to look like Beyonce, Part Deux. She'd be A-OK on 'RuPaul's Drag Race with that tranny-ish face.
This is what happens when women of a certain age try to look like a woman from another generation. If she has anything else done, she's going to look like one of those creatures from 'Dark Crystal'!
Solange really grew into her looks and I find her style appropriate and she is just as pretty as Beyonce, if not more so. Her skin is a nicer hue, in my opinion.
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Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
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Agree with most of what you said, but Solange prettier than Beyonce? Never! Solange is pretty, but you're not going her any favors by lying/exaggerating.
There's no way she had a baby .. Not with her body type . No way at all !
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 03/20/2012 - 11:09am.
I gotta say Afro Girl has one hell of a pretty smile.
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Agreed. I like her hair, too. I think Beyawnce is very beautiful, but bitch has tired me with her tacky style and busted weaves. Solange is growing on me looks wise(plus homegirl isn't NEARLY as annoying as her ubiquitous sister)
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"All great truths begin as blasphemies." - George Bernard Shaw
LOL Bored, we were all thinking it! He looks just like her. Datura, I think Solange looks really cute too. She seems down to Earth and normal, and I love that she keeps her hair natural.
And hahaha MK @ "Gizmo's Drag Race". NAILED. IT.
Not Impressed: Right? I think she's the classy one out of the crew. I was going to say she's the "Khloe" of the Knowles clan, but I don't know anything about her personality. I just know that every time I see her photographed, I like her style. And I love her name.
Maybe Basement Baby will the be REAL star someday...
The mogwai analogy is apt.
I gotta say Afro Girl has one hell of a pretty smile.
Oh ya, and she has a nice black complexion not that weird gray sis and mom are sporting. WTF is up with that shit?
Some site was comment on how B got her body back so quickly. Easy, when she was NEVER PREGNANT!
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Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead
Submitted by Hekki on Tue, 03/20/2012 - 10:56am.
Yeah, I respect that she does her own thing and isn't trying to be a carbon-copy her sister with the blonde weaves and general self-centered attention whoring. She also seems to be pretty comfortable in her own skin.
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Douchechill!
Submitted by Sweetas on Tue, 03/20/2012 - 10:23am.
Whoa! Well it's easy to see where Jay gets his good looks from!
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Beat me to it.
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I want you to get on them fat chubby knees and take muh manhood in to your sugarwalls!-Early Cuyler -Squidbillies-
Now, see, I think Beyonce's dress is nice, but she accessorized it ALL wrong. She should have left that S.S. Luftwaffe necklace on eBay and gone with a nice brooch and some peep-toe pumps.
And unless she's wearing some kind of compression bra, I doubt she's breastfeeding her pillow. Her boobs would be much bigger if she were. *misses milk-producing D's*
bmitted by ditquoi on Tue, 03/20/2012 - 10:46am.
I
anyway in the main pic, Tina looks like that Mexican tranny from Snapped that killed her lover's wife.
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OMG ditquoi! You are so right on!! Yeah!!!! That killer tranny
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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED: "Solange is the only *slightly* tolerable one of this bunch."
Agreed. I liked the video she did for kids "Mama Loves Baby". I don't care; I like her fashion sense for the most part. I wouldn't wear the clothes she does, but they work on her, and she's not all about looking like a hooker, like her sister. I think SHE is the one with the style in that family. She never looks ghetto.
Sure, because the best people to look for political guidance are celebutards who are so stupid, they need a fucking GPS to find their own assholes. Right.
ETA: Jay Z is as talented as he is handsome, isn't he? God, what an ugly, worthless motherfucker.
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"All great truths begin as blasphemies." - George Bernard Shaw
I kind of like Solange...
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"Brows should not look like a condiment!" -MK
basement baby looks hot as hell. not like a freak. like her sister. everyone's different. baby weight can be lost pretty quick. a lot of times it is a lot of water. and the residual 20 lbs can be lost really quick with the right diet and exercise. anyone claiming someone isn't really pregnant just really rubs me the wrong way. how dare someone make that kind of accusation during their time of glory and realness. just seems so wrong and almost taboo.
I'm getting tired of het wearing blue all the time. Seriously.
Jay-Z probably has blue balls to match her dress.
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Time cast a spell on you but
You won't forget me
I know I could have loved you but
You would not let me
-Fleetwood Mac
"the latest eliminated Mogwai from Gizmo's Drag Race."
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! This post is amazing.
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
Look at them all fancy-pants and influential! I thought that was J-Z next to them! Poor lady having to stand next to all that House of Derriere plastic - they must be giving her the vapes! Her Mamma won't have any skin left to pull soon! Yikes, Beowulf, this is your future, HAHAHA! Anyway, hope they were very generous to the campaign! ;p
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"... looking in her face is heaven for all the youth and hope and good will." Thamar 03/01/2012 ☺♪☼♫ ░░░░
Submitted by Stan Hooper on Tue, 03/20/2012 - 10:31am.
How could Poppa Knowles have ever cheated on Tina -- that woman is so majestic!!
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LMAO, Yes she sure is handsome.
I'm glad everyone finally sees that this woman did not birth a child.
WORST. REALITY. SHOW. EVER.
anyway in the main pic, Tina looks like that Mexican tranny from Snapped that killed her lover's wife.
She so did not have that baby. And lmao at plastic gremlin. Has anyone ever gotten cheek fillers/ implants and looked good? Stay away from that shit.
If anyone watches celebrity apprentice tia's face is fucked up too from bad cheek implants or something even though she seems really sweet.
Judging Beyonce figure you'd have to say her baby was what, 2.5 lbs full term?
I really like Solange's outfit. The skirt is, perhaps, too tight, but she looks good.
Did Tina lose a ton of weight? I don't remember her being that sharp and angular. The cheek implants aren't helping the situation. Not everyone can be Chicken Cutlets...
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Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. –michelleb
It happens and I am a statistic of that rarity. Gained 75 pounds during my pregnancy and within 5 weeks was back to fitting into my pre-pregnancy clothes with room to spare. Diet and 2 hour daily workouts. And this bitch has even more time than that to hit the gym.
This peeps coming out of the woodwork all suddenly political because there's a candidate who happens to be black is such bs ad I am so over it.
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Raising the bar for lowering standards since 1982.
But beyonce never even gained the 75 pounds.
black women are especially and uniquely beautiful because of their gorgeous skin and remarkable facial bone structure. it is a shame when they try to look white with the hair lenght and hair straightening and nose jobs, etc. i've always thought a natural look of a small afro or little corkscrew curls looks best. that combined with a wardrobe is has a hint of african is really hot. if i were a black chick i would be totally rocking that look.
Saw some hideous fugly House of Diarrhea bedding at Bed, Bath, and Beyond. Tacky.
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Visit Anthony Higgins Performances on Facebook.
Solange is the only *slightly* tolerable one of this bunch.
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Douchechill!
"Gizmo's Drag Race."
FUCKING LOL
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
The woman on the left is the only hot bitch in this photo.
Her mom looks evil. Jada Pinkett Smith has the weird cheek-thing going on, too. They're all obnoxious phonies. Even my mother doesn't believe that Beyonce was pregnant, and she doesn't even read gossip blogs. SMH.
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Douchechill!
How could Poppa Knowles have ever cheated on Tina -- that woman is so majestic!!
(I can't believe I typed that with straight fingers)
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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie
how come with so many celebs, the women are all dressed up and the men look like delivery boys? i can't stand this whole family. sick of them. solange looks weird. i don't believe bey was pregnant and greedy bitch is going back to work already. another kid raised by nannies.
"oih yeahhhh i dont believe you had plastic surgery or a pillow baby at allllll."
It was all under our/ur very nose and u still believe she was preggers for real. Talk about brainwashed morons...
fast forward weight loss. and the conspiracy theory continues..
whoa Tina's cheeks look like they could cut a bitch.
the 5th picture, with the girl in the red dress...does anyone else think the Beyonces face looks strange? (she's in the background)
Submitted by KA on Tue, 03/20/2012 - 10:18am.
oih yeahhhh i dont believe you had plastic surgery or a pillow baby at allllll. no one and i mean no one looks this good after recently having a baby. if you do well congratufuckinglations on being a rarity.
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I'd have to say, she has age and lots of $$$$ on her side to look like that, if she indeed did have the kid.
MK, that post was gold!
And Tina is one more surgical procedure away from wiping her tears from the back of her neck!
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Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
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Whoa! Well it's easy to see where Jay gets his good looks from! And yeah, Bey dropped that baby weight unbelievably fast. *side eye*
Beyawnce's boobs sure went down fast. I hate those phony, self-absorbed ASSHOLES. Ugh.
And Jay-Z looks just like his Mommy hahahahaha!