Harry Potter And The Deathly Home Perm

March 19, 2012 / Posted by:

The scents of the JcPenney hair salon and the Korean beauty supply store where my high school friend bought his violet contacts at just fucked me in the nostrils after looking at these pictures of DanRad and 1995 David Spade Dane DeHaan shooting scenes in Brooklyn this morning for the movie Kill Your Darlings. DanRad kissed his eyeballs with brown contacts and put his hair in curlers to play Allen Ginsburg (James Franco who?). DanRad as Allen Ginsburg looks like a 20-something Hipster Potter who smells like old book pages, patchouli and cloves.

DanRad with curly hair is sort of giving me “younger and slightly hotter It’s Pat” vibes. If you were making out with a curly haired DanRad in the last stall in a gay bar bathroom, you wouldn’t know whether you’d get a mouth full of coochie or a mouth full of peen as you went down to get romantic with his down low parts. The Sanrio Surprise mystery bag of crotches! That is why DanRad should get himself some Hollywood Pink Foam Rollers and keep this look FOREVER!

Speaking of the last stall in the gay bar bathroom, thanks to J. Harvey for helping a ho out this weekend. If it wasn’t for J. Harvey’s posts, I wouldn’t have been able to get drunk at Outback in front of my mom while she rolled her sober eyes at me (somebody has to drive home). I also wouldn’t have discovered that a fucking Farrell’s opened near her house. A Farrell’s! If you don’t know what a Farrell’s is, just think of a place that has shitty food, old timey hats and a whole lot of trash! It’s glorious. I know where I’m having my next birthday party at. Does anybody know if Farrell’s has an in-house male stripper or do I have to bring my own? Rickulous stripping at Farrell’s is like two dreams coming true together. Parents, please shuffle your children out the exit door!

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