Tim Tebow And Taylor Swift Went On A Date
File this under: Rick Santorum's answer to Brangelina (sorry, Duggars) has been found.
This is one of those gross things that I never saw coming, but should've seen coming, because it is a match made in wholesome boring Aryan heaven. Both Celebuzz and Clevver News say earth's only direct connection to Jesus, Tim Tebow, and the American Anne of Green Gables, Taylor Swift, went out to dinner together on Monday night after meeting at a pre-Oscar party last week. I can try to use all of my brain's energy to come up with a couple name for these two, but it's easier and more fitting just to call them: UGH!!!!!
Celebuzz says that Taylor skipped up to Tim at WME's pre-Oscar party on Sunday night and started talking to him for over an hour. Talking to Taylor for over an hour would make me Tebow right over a toilet, but he was obviously into that shit, because he took her out for dinner on Monday night. Clevver News says that Taylor and Tim skipped into Century City's Toscanova restaurant and sat with a small group. Tim and Taylor didn't leave together, but he walked her out like the true gentlemen that he is. GROSS!
You know, some bitches have been trying to tell me that Tim Teblowjob is as gay as the image of me ordering a pouf from Cb2 (or the image of me dancing to an Atomic Kitten song in the shower while soaping myself up with a turquoise puff full of strawberry-scented body wash), but he never made me fart out a rainbow until now. Dating Taylor Swift is to gaydars as the cast of Jersey Shore is to breathalyzers. Taylor can make a gaydar overload and explode. Nothing says "I LOVE TO GARGLE ON A PEEN HEAD" like "dating" Renee Zellweger-in-training Taylor Swift.
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"As a Buddhist, I wanted to say, from my perspective of religion, I don't think Tebow thinks God determines who will win or lose, but rather, more from the insight of his own body and mind and capabilities."
I like your perspective which is why I like Buddhism, but as an ex-Bible thumper I can tell you that he does most likely think that his God decides who wins the game, much like people think that God blesses America over any other nation and that's why we are the bestest and so it's ok to kill off a bunch of people in other nations, etc. vomit etc.
Fundamentalists are "highly favored". Or so they think.
Oh good. I can hardly wait to be thoroughly nauseated by her next breakup-themed hit.
Orangebella “ All atheists can shout their shit and make fun of Christians but when someone speaks out in favor for their religion and what they believe all hell breaks loose.”
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This sounds like Lyryn Hill unplugged
She must be a boring fuck. The type that just lies there and doesn't make a noise or move.
Submitted by Aerialgreen on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 2:16pm.
Don't mind Tebow is into religion, what I need to know is if he is available to be cloned, for, um... research purposes.
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hahahahahahahaha
Don't mind Tebow is into religion, what I need to know is if he is available to be cloned, for, um... research purposes.
Submitted by Zorba-the-Geek on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 2:04pm.
Nothing worse than a brainwashed Bible-thumping closet case. I can't wait for him to be caught toe tapping in a public bathroom. You know it's coming.
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Actually he may well be of the same "Ew, i don't even touch myself there!" variety than she is. They are kind of a match made in church-approved-nofun heaven.
--
You got a lot of money, but you can't afford the freeway
Submitted by chewinsmoke on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:25pm.
I agree with EC - Tim Tebow is a breath of fresh air to the NFL. It would be great if all athletes used their celebrity status for the greater good of others rather than...well, you all know how most of those NFL types roll.
He's just a good guy who is committed to his faith - there's nothing wrong with that. To all the Tim Tebow naysayers, we love him here in Denver, so we'll keep him! :)
Taylor Swift on the other hand....ugh.
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
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Ditto. I like him, I think he is hot too. I don't necessarily believe that he thinks God is making him win games. I think it just the fact that because he does believe, God is the one who is giving him strength to continue on (I think his pastor did say God was helping him but who cares). I mean, this poor kid's own f*cking COACH dissed him in the beginning of the season. All atheists can shout their shit and make fun of Christians but when someone speaks out in favor for their religion and what they believe all hell breaks loose.
AND regardless if you like him or not he has done so much good for other people with his foundation.
oh and Taylor Swift...ewe.
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"Independent films are those black and white hippy movies. They're always about gay cowboys eating pudding." - Eric Cartman
❥
Submitted by warmjuice: "...If you watch this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojXkblN7pC0
and think tim tebow isn’t gay you have no gaydar."
AH HAHAHAHHA HAHAHAHA!
Wow. The fact that he went on a "date" with the Queen of the Beards made me suspicious. That video made me even more certain.
*chuckles some more*
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 2:09pm.
Submitted by Dog on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 2:03pm.
Jack. Sorry. I was too blinded by IF's greasy forehead to remember to post it.
http://www.celebitchy.com/212131/ok_brad_pitt_told_maddox_about_jennifer...
It's in the first and last paragraphs.
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Oh My, Gay Dog Owner!
I'm so sorry to read you were beaten but glad to know you're battling back!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Nah, that was your mother.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by Dog on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 2:03pm.
Jack. Sorry. I was too blinded by IF's greasy forehead to remember to post it.
http://www.celebitchy.com/212131/ok_brad_pitt_told_maddox_about_jennifer...
It's in the first and last paragraphs.
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Oh My, Gay Dog Owner!
I'm so sorry to read you were beaten but glad to know you're battling back!
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:55pm.
What bugs me is the media and the politicized Right that pitted one side against the other and used him for their own ends. If he had won the Superbowl the Right would have had a field day saying it was in FACT Jesus himself that endorsed Elbow and proof the Right is right.
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Agreed
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 2:00pm.
Spiteful break-up song coming up in 1,2,3 ...
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Hahaha! "You Are Going To Hell To Be Tortured Forever But Remember I Luv You".
Submitted by cattitude on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 2:03pm.
That comparison is an insult to Anne of Green Gables.
^^^WORD. Anne was spunky, smart, and interesting. This chick is zzzzzzzzz.
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Douchechill!
Nothing worse than a brainwashed Bible-thumping closet case. I can't wait for him to be caught toe tapping in a public bathroom. You know it's coming.
Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:28pm.
I hate anyone who is ignorant enough to believe that an all knowing sky lord is making him win football games. IF there is a god, he doesn't care about your fucking football game
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As a Buddhist, I wanted to say, from my perspective of religion, I don't think Tebow thinks God determines who will win or lose, but rather, more from the insight of his own body and mind and capabilities. Giving the glory to God, as you will. Buddha teaches us we should be humble and seek from within, so I just see Tebow as doing the same within his religion... yeah, I am a Bronco fan and if that (his belief) is what it takes for Tim to succeed, I am all for it and not offended at all by his actions. And I am a Linn fan now, too. Because I like the out of nowhere quiet smart kid who can succeed when no one saw it coming.
And I liked the movie Rudy, too.
Jack. Sorry. I was too blinded by IF's greasy forehead to remember to post it.
http://www.celebitchy.com/212131/ok_brad_pitt_told_maddox_about_jennifer...
It's in the first and last paragraphs.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
That comparison is an insult to Anne of Green Gables.
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:55pm.
It's not really Elbow that bug me with his beliefs, each to their own I've NO probs with that at all. What bugs me is the media and the politicized Right that pitted one side against the other and used him for their own ends. If he had won the Superbowl the Right would have had a field day saying it was in FACT Jesus himself that endorsed Elbow and proof the Right is right.
I fear we're living in very scary times.
To a large extent I agree with what you're saying...but I think Tebow has really tried to distance himself from all of the political hype surrounding his image and has tried hard to keep the focus largely on the game itself. But yes, I agree - if the Broncos would have gone any further in the playoffs or to the Super Bowl - the right wing would have screamed that the second coming of Christ had truly occurred, so even though I'm a huge Broncos fan, it's probably good they didn't make it any farther (for the sake of every American's sanity). Those evangelical candidates (e.g., Rick Perry, Michele Bachman) were already comparing themselves to Tebow, which was gag-worthy.
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
Dog - do you have a link?
*praise Jesus*
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"wah I don't want to marry some psycho bitch!" ~ Dr. Suck N Fuck
Submitted by islandgirl on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:57pm.
Submitted by letinstar on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:54pm.
he probably has hello kitty stickers on his bible too...
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If by bible you mean penis, then yes. May the good Lord be with you. :)
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that's what i meant...we are eye to eye on this...:)
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:58pm.
Well, someone hasn't gotten laid in a gay dog's age. So sad.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Spiteful break-up song coming up in 3,2,1 ...
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"We are here on earth to do good for others.
What the others are here for, I don't know."
W.H. Auden
Submitted by Phoebe on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:45pm.
Submitted by warmjuice on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:36pm.
The armed forces is not an all-male organization, and no one says there are no gay people in it.
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Thank you...
and lololl at IrishFury and closet z-snapper
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"wah I don't want to marry some psycho bitch!" ~ Dr. Suck N Fuck
Phoebe I am sorry let me clarify; initially men and women have separate barracks- all male, all female. When did I accuse anybody of not knowing there are homosexuals in the armed forces? I should clarify again, I do not believe people know how MANY gays that are in the armed forces AND SPORTS (my original point but thanx); I think the number of gays in those fields of work are much higher that what the average person assumes hence “that person isn’t gay” when they clearly are.
If Tim Tebow and Kris Humphries were hairdressers this wouldn’t even be a question.
Off topic. MK got a personal shout-out on Celebitchy!!
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by Dog on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:54pm.
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:50pm.
She is a whore, LisaRose, honey. A downlow, dirty, rotten stinking lowlife, STD carrying, evil slut-whore.
^^^^^^^^^^^
You'd know all about that, wouldn't you? CONDIMENT WHORE!
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O.M. Goodness, look at your frou frou dog avi. Your dog is so gay and in such a bad way! Is it's name Tim Tebow? Does your husband know? Is your dog Christian? Has it accepted Jesus Christ as it's personal swishy gay saver? UGH!
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by letinstar on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:54pm.
he probably has hello kitty stickers on his bible too...
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If by bible you mean penis, then yes. May the good Lord be with you. :)
So this is the douche that's creating "controversy" by doodling some numbers on his face related to some chapters of the bible or some other boring shit?. I don't care about football and I don't know how good he is, but my guess is he is more known for his bible thumpin' antics than his field achievements. I could be wrong, but I still don't give a rat's ass. All I can say is that this pair will make those whitey bible thumpin' folks cum buckets. To us, these two are a boring and uninteresting couple, but for them it must be a dream come true, an example of the purity and chastity of the all-american white people who are dreaming of the return of the fucking 50's. ;)
And I disagree with this "don't say the word retard 'cause some might be offended". If this is applied, then we won't be able to say fat, skinny, bag of bones , etc. because there is a high chance of someone being offended.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
It's not really Elbow that bug me with his beliefs, each to their own I've NO probs with that at all. What bugs me is the media and the politicized Right that pitted one side against the other and used him for their own ends. If he had won the Superbowl the Right would have had a field day saying it was in FACT Jesus himself that endorsed Elbow and proof the Right is right.
I fear we're living in very scary times.
I DO NOT GET THE BIG FUCKING DEAL ABOUT TIBOW! WTF??????????????????????????????????
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:50pm.
She is a whore, LisaRose, honey. A downlow, dirty, rotten stinking lowlife, STD carrying, evil slut-whore.
^^^^^^^^^^^
You'd know all about that, wouldn't you? CONDIMENT WHORE!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
what could these two possibly talk about with each other? taylor having hello kitty stickers on her bible? he probably has hello kitty stickers on his bible too...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Submitted by LisaRose on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:45pm.
I must be the only one at dlisted who loves Taylor. I long for sweetness in people and I feel she is truly sweet.
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She is a whore, LisaRose, honey. A downlow, dirty, rotten stinking lowlife, STD carrying, evil slut-whore.
If you want sweet, check out Jodie Marsh. Now that's a real womeh the likes of Slut-Whore could only dream of being.
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Dark-sided!
"Talking to Taylor for over an hour would make me Tebow right over a toilet"....
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Me too, MK!!!
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Fuckery is what fuckery does.
Oh Mon Dieu!
I know nothing about Tim Tebow but I did google him for interviews and NO I DON'T GIVE A FLYING FIG IF HE IS GAY OR NOT but he seems very soft-spoken, very swishy and perhaps a closet z-snapper.
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Dark-sided!
I must be the only one at dlisted who loves Taylor. I long for sweetness in people and I feel she is truly sweet. I wanted her and Taylor to be a couple so bad. I don't think she dates a lot. I just don't think any of them last.
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www.dungeonhordes.com
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Submitted by warmjuice on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:36pm.
The armed forces is not an all-male organization, and no one says there are no gay people in it.
SwiftBow? TimTeTays? TimmyTay? All pretty sickening.
LMAO at IG!
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I've got ten bucks and me and dirty eddie are staying out all weekend! - Rob Pue (thank you BBitch and Sweetas)
The difficult brown?! I think we're all done here. -MK
Ah lurvs you Cuppy xo
I think GingeMinge has hit the nail on the head. (Or the idiot.)
Tbag had better get him some hottie strange while he can because the NFL has already realized that preachers make shitty quarter backs.
Timmy if god loved you, you wouldn't suck so much.
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Surfing the apocalypse.
"Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 1:28pm.
I hate anyone who is ignorant enough to believe that an all knowing sky lord is making him win football games. IF there is a god, he doesn't care about your fucking football game. And he doesn't allow you to win it just because you pray on the sidelines for millions to see. Idiot. He and zero singing talent Taylor belong together."
Agreed!
And...not to get all biblical up in here...but if he actually read the bible he would know that Jesus said not to be like the Pharisees, who prayed for everyone to see.
Signed,
X-Bible Thumper
Publicity stunt. Why would the spokesman for faux-abstinence (the only sex is vaginal sex - anything else is GAME ON) take about with a girl who's a serial dater?
He is hot enough to jerk off to once, I wouldn’t bother to hit it
If you watch this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojXkblN7pC0
and think tim tebow isn’t gay you have no gaydar. If you think Kris Humphries is straight you have no gaydar. It’s just the truth. I think the fact that some people think a dumb jock cannot be gay gets in the way. Trust me any all-male above 18 institution whether it’s the armed forces or sports there are going to be a lot of homosexuals and those that experiment then move on, and those that stay that way.
Once upon a time, a Jesus-preacher and a "virginal" country singer went on a first date...
Isn't this how all Grimm horror tales begin?
And how would you think it'll end? With "and she slashed him while on his knees with her guitar strings..." or what else?
* Spreads agreement flavored sprinkles on Cupcake :-) *
They're both rich as bejebus and your gold digging skills are letting you down MK. If they have a bank account and pulse, you pounce. You're sounding choosey.
I'm trying to imagine what they must have talked about.
Her: "Oh, SHUCKS!! I'm just so humbled to be here!"
Him: "Praise the Lord! Now introduce me to Jake Gyllenhaal."
SweeBo