Afternoon Crumbs
Beyonce to herself: "I wonder if this sweet little Dutch boy next to me would like a job as Blue Ivy's fourth-string au pair?" Jay-Z to himself: "Oh fuck, B is going to try to hire that Brown Bunny chick who knobbed on Vincent Gallo." - Lainey Gossip
Somebody has to dress like an early 90s lot lizard trying to trade handjobs for Nirvana tickets and that somebody is RiRi - Hollywood Tuna
Megan Fox is in a bikini and Brian Austin Green is starting to slowly morph into the vato mechanic who used to fix my mom's Datsun - The Superficial
People who should've been in the Super Bowl halftime show instead of Madge: this Brazilian drag show - Towleroad
Is that a family of squirrels fighting under a blanket I see in CoCo's butt ultrasound? - (site NSFW) Drunken Stepfather
28 pictures that make my gutter brain think of Cumonmyglasses.com - The Berry
Jennifer Aniston's sacred chichis are only for Justin Theroux - Celebitchy
Florence Welch giving me "the ginger ghost of Peaches & Cream Barbie's past" at the Brit Awards - Just Jared
Bitch Got The Beat Down: The Teen Mom Edition - ICYDK
A SANS blow-out Bruno Mars - I'm Not Obsessed
My thoughts on Lea Michele and that one dude getting it on are best expressed through Chris Colfer's face - SOW
I really wish these were pictures of Kelly LeBrock instead of Kelly Brook - Popoholic
Ick. Nast. - Popsugar
My childhood will finally die a slow miserable death if there's a scene where Pee-wee does Chairy between her seat cushions - The Daily What
But more importantly, how did Steve-O make it past Italy's customs checkpoint? - Hollywood Rag
RiRi in uniform - Cityrag
Does Spike Lee have an alibi? - Crunk + Disorderly
Let's Cookie Time like it was the first time! - Videogum
• 
Lol, beware. It's nothing personal. You can have all the opinions you want about anything and everything you want. I just don't think it's too much to ask that they be informed opinions. When our Community Organizer in Chief was running for President I heard of a poll in ENGLAND that showed 4 out of 5 BRITS wanted Obama to win, and I thought exactly the same way about that because, while there were very few news organizations actually vetting the man as they were all too busy getting thrills up their legs at the sight of the crease in his pants (an anchor on our very own MSNBC actually made that declaration), what little I was hearing concerning his past was fairly disturbing, mainly that there was evidence that he wasn't very fond of America and saw our Constitution in a contemptuous light. Well guess what? The Brits aren't very fond of him now, either, because, through several actions big and small on his part, it appears as though he hates them. You see, his father and grandfather were Kenyan, and Kenya was oppressed under the evil colonialist, imperialist British Empire. There are rumors his grandpa may have even been tortured at the time. So... And btw, I love England and the Brits. They are our best friends and closest allies behind Canada and Canadians (and I hear one of your soldiers who is fighting with our soldiers in Afghanistan is the best sniper bar none anyone has ever seen).
Anyway, your country is beautiful and I'm sure you are, too. My country, on the other hand, is being run by a bunch of petulant children of the sixties with daddy issues.
Double post.
ItsBritneyBitches; well I was thinking it, but since you said it... I didnt leave my first baby with anyone until she was maybe 5 months old.
Hey, I'm not saying its wrong, but I don't understand it. I know some terrific moms who've never felt tied to their babies that way. To each her own, I guess, but I can't fathom feeling that way. Even with my third baby, I never felt free to leave her until she was a few months old.
I like RiRi's new look and I have always loved the way she dresses.
xoxoxoxox
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
On behalf of all Canadians, we sincerely apologize for the audacity of our Canadian gossip columnist having an opinion aboot politics that aren't even occurring within our own borders.
It is, as you say, none of our f%@king business. American politics never have an impact on us and thus we have no reason to opine aboot them. And truly, she should have kept herself as uninformed about your political situation as you are of our moose overlords.
Again, we are truly, truly sorry.
Damn B is asking for people yelling YOURE A BAD MOTHER!!!! at her.
Seriously, I don't have children (and I don't think I could ever be mature enough to raise them and I won't ever be financially able to support my children if I had any) but I know that you don't leave a baby this young home with anyone else.
I actually talked to my own mother and she said she wouldn't have even thought of going out and leaving me alone.
rihanna and taylor momsen must share a closet or something.
Lol, skabazzle. Just last night I read something from Lainey and I decided I would never read her again either. She's very self-important and just too 'gossipy', and she'll go on and on about Rob Pattinson's "tea-pouring hands" or have names for certain celebrities that I don't get like "Porny" for Jessica Simpson (the John Mayer thing?) and "Shelfy" for Jessica Biel (her butt? And yes, Biel does seem very boring but, God, is that any reason for Lainey to have it so badly in for her?). I didn't really understand her dislike for "Pippy" (Justin Timberlake) until she had an item one day about his supposed mistreatment of a waitress, so I understand a lot of these celebs have a history I'm not aware of, but it seems to me she talks about most of them in a way she should only be talking about with a girlfriend (ex. Gerard Butler, a.k.a. "Spittle", because he disgusts her so much for reasons she can't explain. Who gives a shit). Then there are the ones she adores. God almighty.
Anyway (and I know I will be hated here after I say this), yesterday she said something snide about the Tea Party, and (while I'm not a member) I thought, "This woman is Canadian! What the f_ck business is it of hers that millions upon millions of American citizens have become incredibly concerned about where MY country is headed". And before anyone here starts in with the 'teabagger (which our very own president has called those millions upon millions of American citizens) equals racism' crap, just know that when OWS started, Obama and his henchmen (i.e. Van Jones, Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, Chuck Schumer, etc. etc.) were giddy with excitement that they now had their own version of the Tea Party, the existence of which is truly frightening to them because they think most Americans are a bunch of dumbasses who have no interest in government's abuse of power as long as we 'get ours', which invariably belongs to someone else. Alas, I don't think there were too many teabaggers who took dumps on police cars, so I think they needlessly got their hopes up.
On behalf of all Canadians, we sincerely apologize for the audacity of our Canadian gossip columnist having an opinion aboot politics that aren't even occurring within our own borders.
It is, as you say, none of our f%@king business. American politics never have an impact on us and thus we have no reason to opine aboot them. And truly, she should have kept herself as uninformed about your political situation as you are of our moose overlords.
Again, we are truly, truly sorry.
Submitted by Hekki on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 10:13pm.
Solange will have a field day if beyoence/jayz's daughter grew up with jayz's looks. she and he basement mice will have a rave party!
um... poor chloe sevigny, girl will never live down that movie :P sigh its only because in america, sex scenes are soo fake so any sex scene like the chloe/vincent gallo movie only happens every 20 years.
if people go to european cinema, they will find sex scenes like that are pretty common. no one even blinks.
Submitted by Hekki on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 10:13pm.
Man, Jay-Z is oogly! Beyonce really rolled the dice, procreating with him. Maybe she figured her pretty genes would win (so far, so good) and that plastic surgery would fix it, if necessary.
But then again, look at poor Bobbi Kristina and Rumer Willis. There are SOME genes surgery can't fix
**************************************
Bobbi is gonna be ok--a nip here; a tuck there; a little shaving off the ol' shnozz, and she'll shine.
Taterhead Rumer is just beyond repair, and should go away to a desk job in the back of a quiet office somewhere.
Reggie B better not get back with donkey ass Kim! I'll back up Momma B and tell her he can't marry that ho!
Submitted by Hekki on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 10:13pm.
Man, Jay-Z is oogly! Beyonce really rolled the dice, procreating with him.
________________________________________________
...couldn't agree more...you'd think that when he signed the deal with S*tan that he would have thrown in a rider to improve his looks...
...or at least ensure the rest of the world would view him through beer goggles...
...but like Vadge's tragic oversight of not asking for legitimate cinematic success in her deal, looks like Jay-Z totally forgot to ask for some kind of remedy to his chimp face...there I said it...someone had to...
________________________________________________
...'She’s a really nice person and I have great respect for her as an actress — and I think most actresses are c*nts with a capital K' - Mickey Rourke...
Man, Jay-Z is oogly! Beyonce really rolled the dice, procreating with him. Maybe she figured her pretty genes would win (so far, so good) and that plastic surgery would fix it, if necessary.
But then again, look at poor Bobbi Kristina and Rumer Willis. There are SOME genes surgery can't fix!
I hope the money is worth it if his genes win out, Bey!
Submitted by mharker on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 7:41pm.
I disagree with Tyler Perry's billboard vandal. If his movies are anything like Tyler Perry's House of Payne, I hope he makes movies forever. I've never seen a show so awkwardly attempt to force serious issues in an otherwise lame comedy show.
-------------------------
The only thing that's funny about Tyler's TV shows is how unfunny they are. It's "bad joke, bad joke, bad joke, crack addiction!" or "horrid joke parenting problem!". I really don't get the attraction/success.
----------------------------------
"I bet his crotch looks like an uncooked dough cigar lying on a bed of saffron" MK
"Submitted by Andrei on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 8:50pm.
OHhHHHh.. I get it. Yeah. I can see the dangers in that. The small nuances in books and in social interactions is so hard to sometimes catch on film. If I was gonna make a movie like The Help... I'd gather up all those colored folks and ask them what it was really like and what they thought exactly. For me ... truth is so more enriching and better than stereotype. So, my first job would be to eliminate stereotypes in my mind best I could."
------------------------------------------------
I think it's hard to successfully translate a book to the big screen anyway, but yea it just seemed to make light of or barely touch on the really serious implications of their plight. Like in the movie I thought Hilly came across as more of a "mean girl" as opposed to the extremely dangerous person that she is. But if you liked the movie I would recommend the book, the author does do a good job of rounding out some of the characters.
------------------------------------------------
"I'd rather regret the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done." -Lucille Ball-sy
Or.. *African Americans. I dunno. All people are "colored" according to race and genes.. which is sorta an illusion, too.
Submitted by tonicbitch on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 8:46pm.
OHhHHHh.. I get it. Yeah. I can see the dangers in that. The small nuances in books and in social interactions is so hard to sometimes catch on film. If I was gonna make a movie like The Help... I'd gather up all those colored folks and ask them what it was really like and what they thought exactly. For me ... truth is so more enriching and better than stereotype. So, my first job would be to eliminate stereotypes in my mind best I could.
"Submitted by Andrei on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 8:33pm.
I've only seen The Help one time. So, a second viewing would probably be beneficial. And I have not read the book. However, what is so awful about that movie? Other than some overacting by a few characters."
------------------------------------------------
I read the book before seeing the movie and thought it was a poor adaptation. The book was well-written, but I felt like it trivialized and downplayed some of the extremely complex social matters that it addresses. A friend of mine who lived through that period and read it commented that it was like "a white person's impression of what they thought it was like".
------------------------------------------------
"I'd rather regret the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done." -Lucille Ball-sy
Lol Andrei.
Beyonce, you are in 2012 in a gymnasium watching a basketball game court side. Not Studio 54 in the seventies.
I was very lucky kid and got TWO peaches and cream barbies ;) good memories...
Oh and Coco's ass looks semi-normal in those pants.
Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun.
-Ash
Submitted by jelliebean on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 8:35pm.
Wearing uncomfy, crazy shoes and small hats better makes you look less human and less like you have to take a shit. Because see.. you have more important things to worry about.. like keeping a too-small hat on your little head or wearing heels that lift up your butt for examination.
Submitted by Thamar on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 8:21pm.
Try Zappos.com!
Submitted by Andrei on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 8:23pm.
Submitted by skabazzle on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 8:20pm.
Haha. Yeah. You mean The Help the movie, too, right?
Yeah, I assume that's what she has a problem with, though it was pretty true to the book, so maybe she has a problem with the book. I loved the book and thought the movie did a good job portraying it, so I'm all like whatthefuckever Lainey, why are we looking at a pic of the Carters right now? Lol
Well aren't you just carrying around a big bag of nothing!
Ditto to the comments on the platform stripper shoes that are everywhere. They are disgustingly ugly when on the foot. I would love to see more celebs topple over, they look ridiculous. May they go away, along with the trend of those too small fedora hats and some other craptastic looks of celeb style i.e. the long Gunne Sax lace prom dresses from the seventies.
I've only seen The Help one time. So, a second viewing would probably be beneficial. And I have not read the book. However, what is so awful about that movie? Other than some overacting by a few characters.
Chloe 'its recently come to my attenshun that I like barbequois' annoys the fuck out of me. Such a pretentious fuglette. Beyonce's weave is looking very nice btw. I'd almost believe its her real hair.
I do Pagents!
I actually agree with Lainey on The Help, but mostly because I thought the movie was a steaming pile of shit (the book was only slightly better). Still hate Lainey though.
------------------------------------------------
"I'd rather regret the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done." -Lucille Ball-sy
Submitted by skabazzle on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 7:33pm.
I sat through a Lainey article for the second time and she again managed to turn whatever the post was originally about into why The Help sends a bad message. I can't with her, I'm not reading her site again.
----
Ha, I clicked on the link and promptly forgot what I was doing there. Shut the window, was back here and realized, yeah, I wanted to see if Beyonce was still "fat" so I had to go back.
Submitted by skabazzle on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 8:20pm.
Haha. Yeah. You mean The Help the movie, too, right?
Love the discussion on shoes...why can't I find this company's shoes? Everywhere I look
ALL SOLD OUT!
"Doc, I don't want to fly anymore"
Submitted by Andrei on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 7:52pm.
Submitted by skabazzle on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 7:33pm.
Why does The Help send a bad message? Forgive me for not wanting to visit Lainey, lol.
@Andrei, I'm baffled about her hate for it because I thought it sent a great message - but I can't stand how she goes on little self-righteous tirades while blogging about Bey and Jay at a basketball game. She led into it by talking about how her readers have asked her to comment on the whole "chink in the armor" gaffe by some ESPN writer referring to Lin and it tailspun from there. I was like ok Lainey, ok.
Well aren't you just carrying around a big bag of nothing!
HAHA. She spread her legs and get it on while on the hood?
Submitted by TequilaTax on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 8:01pm.
Isn't Bey's kid barely a month old? I thought kids that young cry every 2 hours for food or a diaper change.
That is what the army of nannies are for!
Submitted by Andrei on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 7:46pm.
This morning on my way to work, I was not too far from home, going down the highway, and I see this large truck jacked up on some big tires. Pretty common around here. Except the truck was all pink and in the back glass it said "Redneck Barbie."
==============================================
There's a pink Dodge Neon here with the Barbie head logo on the side and says Hood Barbie next to it.
I've seen it several times around town and the chick who drives it is trashy as shit without needing the car to promote it.
_________________________________________________
Raising the bar for lowering standards since 1982.
Submitted by Spaz de la Whoreta on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 7:23pm.
"I hate seeing pictures of these assholes at sporting events who can't even be bothered to watch the damn game. Chloe Sevigny probably walked out of there not knowing which team won."
I agree. But for nostalgic reasons I just can't bring the hate on for Chloe.
peaches & cream barbie, love it!
Isn't Bey's kid barely a month old? I thought kids that young cry every 2 hours for food or a diaper change.
-----------------------------
He kinda reminds me of Ron Jeremy, but...not as classy! - Submitted by david Letterman
Besides, it's just marriage! Who in the hell takes that shit seriously? - Michael K
Someone forgot to tell Joe Camel that it was Beyonce who was supposed to put on weight for the pillow pregnancy.
Submitted by mharker on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 7:41pm.
-------------------
His films are like that too! Haha Madea's fighting with the po-po. Her grand-daughter tells everyone she was molested. Haha Madea's got her gun out! Her neice is being beaten by her husband. It's bizarre.
I don't understand how House of Payne is still on. Who watches that? Oh...sorry :)
Submitted by skabazzle on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 7:33pm.
Why does The Help send a bad message? Forgive me for not wanting to visit Lainey, lol.
This morning on my way to work, I was not too far from home, going down the highway, and I see this large truck jacked up on some big tires. Pretty common around here. Except the truck was all pink and in the back glass it said "Redneck Barbie."
Kim K's ass looks even bigger than the size 14 it usually looks.
**************
It's amazing how much fatter she looks without Spanx.
Her ass is nasty.
LMFAO@ MKs Barbie references!! P.S. I miss CityBarbie so much!
~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♥~♦¤♦~♥~
FANTA FANTA, NO COKE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lnRDU4LdZE
Meat Loaf was in the middle of a show when his knees suddenly hit the stage floor like a narcoleptic bat out of hell ~MK
I disagree with Tyler Perry's billboard vandal. If his movies are anything like Tyler Perry's House of Payne, I hope he makes movies forever. I've never seen a show so awkwardly attempt to force serious issues in an otherwise lame comedy show.
My favorite is the one where the 13-year old son has his girlfriend over for dinner with the family, and they see that she's very clearly pregnant. Everyone makes stupid jokes while trying to avoid the obvious. In the last minute and half of the episode, the son says that she's pregnant because her dad raped her but everything's okay because he told the school counselor about it. End credits.
Keep up the good work, Tyler Perry.
***********************************
Silly rabbit.
And RiRi in "uniform" of navy camo and a navy T-shirt while flipping off the camera says all I need to know about the Battleship movie. UGH.
Well aren't you just carrying around a big bag of nothing!
Ugh! there is nothing news-worthy about the stinkin' carters! why am I seeing them on dlisted so much!!!!
********* SAVE A LIFE. ADOPT A PET *********
I sat through a Lainey article for the second time and she again managed to turn whatever the post was originally about into why The Help sends a bad message. I can't with her, I'm not reading her site again.
Well aren't you just carrying around a big bag of nothing!
Submitted by Hekki on Tue, 02/21/2012 - 6:57pm.
Wut u sed!
My heels are all non-trendy, and my favorite pair are boots with a solid thick heel, thin sole and moderate toe room. I look amazing in them, and if I were mugged I could easily catch up.
*********
I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
I hate seeing pictures of these assholes at sporting events who can't even be bothered to watch the damn game. Chloe Sevigny probably walked out of there not knowing which team won. Can't stand her.
Even Lea Michelle's name is annoying. If that dude is really dating her, he must be as DUH as his character.
Kim K's ass looks even bigger than the size 14 it usually looks.