Mimi From The Drew Carey Show Lives!
If one of Brit Brit's Cheetolings was a girl, this would be them right now.
Most of you have already laughed, weeped and come up with a plan to spike the water system with birth control pills after watching the glorious mess that is Honey Boo-Boo Chile and her creator June the Hutt on Toddlers & Tiaras and every single talk show on television. Part of me wants a daughter just like Honey Boo-Boo Chile, because she's always crunked out of her mind (Like me!), loves money more than people (Like me!) and is a drag queen Jackee Harry trapped in a little girl's body (Like I wish to be!). The other part of me thinks that Honey Boo-Boo Chile and her mom June are a product of the government to promote human sterilization. What ever their deal is, they shared it on The Silver Fox Show (in an episode that airs tomorrow) and I don't think my nightmares will ever be the same again.
Mah Boo gave the moms of Toddlers & Tiaras a child beauty pageant queen makeover, so they know what their daughters feel like. Most of the moms look like any random trick on Slutoween, but June the Hutt took the cake and ate it. Just like June's parenting skills are lost somewhere in the crack of that sideways butt on her neck, my thoughts on this are completely lost too. It's just too much of a beautiful mess. I'd scream at Honey Boo-Boo Chile to turn around and stare into her future, but homegirl is too high to understand. But I do love that she's posing like my chola friend throwing a gang sign in her 7th grade yearbook picture.
Speaking of getting high, here's a clip of Mah Boo trying the "Go-Go Juice" that June the Hutt gives Honey Boo-Boo Chile to give her energy. It's basically the nectar of the white trash gods (Red Bull and Mountain Dew).
You can try Honey Boo-Boo Chile's Go-Go Juice for yourself in a few weeks when Walmart inevitably sells it in their baby section next to Toddler's First Eye Waxing Kit and strawberry-scented wig glue for kids.
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I think (GOD JUST KILL HIMSELF,) after witnessing this shit! If this is the result of being created in the image of a supreme (being)... Then... THE FUCK!!!
Honey's mother looks like Kevin from The Office
I am fairly convinced that people like this are the main reason people from other countries want to drop bombs on America. Vile. Just vile.
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Fair is foul and foul is fair..
Would anyone else rather look at autopsy photos? That woman is uglier than homemade sin dipped in misery.
Those pageants should be against the law. Straight up child abuse!
I <3 Honey Boo Boo Chile!
I know I will be watching Anderson's show today..after a quick trip to the ESSO to buy some RedBull and Mountain Dew!
I actually like Honey Boo Boo Chile better than some of the other brats. I saw her episode and her family lives right next to train tracks. The camera lingered on the trains going by, as if the audience couldn't already tell that they were po' white trash. I kind of have a soft spot for my own kind.
The mother is a land monster though.
First name: Wilda
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I hate child beauty pageants anyway. They always fuck up a kid's life. One of my ex friend's used to do this pageant stuff when she was a little kid like this and now today her self esteem is so low she decided to work her ass off to support a bum guy (an ugly one, too) who gave her 3 kids while the whole time he demands that he only fucks her doggy style because he tells her that her face is too ugly to look at... and she is not ugly. She is cute in the face. Her self esteem has just always been depressed for as long as she has been alive.
So yeah, fuck pageants. It all started with her shitty mom who told her for as long as she lived that she was never good enough for anything and should just aspire to be a slut. Because that's what her own mother is... a slut.
I could go on and on about the fuckery of this family but whatever.
I truly think that land whale's arms are bigger than my thighs.
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Omg 3 chins. And you know her daughter is going to either grow up to be just as grotesque as mommy or she'll go in the completely opposite direction and be an anorexic girl that aspires to be 85 lbs at age 25.
Bravo, Mom. And how did she find a white guy to knock her up in the first place? He must have been desperate as fuck.
because of things like this i look forward to the end of days
The mothers are fat and ugly, and while I will not pick on children, I will say that these kids have a lovely glimpse into their future and what they will look like. *shudders*
Ever notice a disproportionate number of these 'beauty' contestants are chubby and unattractive? And almost all of the mothers weigh 400 lbs?
Freak show.
Yes I agree...Kevin from The Office!
<"Submitted by Gardening Girl on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 6:57pm.
Has this little piglette actually won anything? Come on, those of you that watch this show should be able to tell me.">
Actually, on the show her mother stated she almost never wins, except one of the throw away "Just for being you" awards. And on that particular episode she didn't even get that.
Submitted by ponchiks on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 4:54pm.
...
I don't think that the fathers are proud, most seem to hate it; they just choose to go along. My guess is it's so that they wouldn't have to fuck their nasty wives. And I could just bet that the fattyfatfatfat here makes her husband to lick all the crease-cheese out of her fat folds before the sexy times as well.
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HILARIOUS! Fuck their nasty wives, hahahahahahhaa :D
GROSS!
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
"What is that strange clear liquid dripping out of my eye?"MK
WHO CARES!!! & WHO CARES: THE SEQUEL!!! - MK on Justin
DISGUSTING! This kid could DRANK me under the table! WTF?! She's WAY TOO "crunked out of her mind". And that Mamma-the-hut is permanently sedated! Honey Boo Boo Chile will be suffering from ulcers soon, JC!!!! Yes, agree the Dads must be some giant-pussy-whipped dumbasses to allow this! That is giant pussy that is whipped Y'ALL not pussy-whipped giants!, that don't make sense! ;P
Skinny "sideways butt on her neck" hahahahhahahaah
Gross MK!
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"What is that strange clear liquid dripping out of my eye?"MK
WHO CARES!!! & WHO CARES: THE SEQUEL!!! - MK on Justin
Born with out the "embarring self" gene...
It's bizarre how these people don't realize how stupid they really look?!
Gardening Girl on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 6:57pm.
Has this little piglette actually won anything? Come on, those of you that watch this show should be able to tell me.
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LOL!
Sadly, YES! Honey Boo Boo has won a shit-load of crowns/awards which is how she got on the whole 15-minutes of fame circuit.
I really feel sad for the kid with that mother. Ugh.
Appearing soon on "13 and Pregnant"...
Has this little piglette actually won anything? Come on, those of you that watch this show should be able to tell me.
The pink-frocked mother/daughter duo are equally horrifying. Also, the kid keeps flashing what is essentially the Euro-version of the middle finger (as in, "up your fucking twat".)
Super fat and nasty. I love how that one mom is giving Jabba the side eye in the video.The daughter is heavy already and looks like she might be looking like her mom later in life. So sad.I watch Toddlers and Tiaras just for the train wrecks and this season they did get some low rent moms on there instead of the rich ones they had before.
xoxoxoxox
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
Nice life preservers, Jabba. How many lives could you save with all those chins, bitch?
The dark haired girl looks like a complete dumbass. She'll make a good cheerleader/local tv talk show host.
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
Jabba the Hutt with bronzer.
That Anderson, always tackling the tough issues.
M.I.L.F ...Mom Is Lardy Fat
I submitted this, and it made it. Awesome!
It's like glancing into the mirror and seeing the future, and Honey Boo Boo doesn't have much to look forward to other than possible type 2 diabetes. Lay off that go-go juice child.
I'll admit that I've occasionally watched the show, and while there are the few kids that genuinely seem to enjoy doing those pageants, the majority look like they'd sooner do a belly shot off a corpse than be there. Those high glitz pageants are insane. The over-shopped entry photos that no longer look human are creepy. I just don't understand the mindset of these parents. They have to hype their kids with Mountain Dew and Pixie Sticks because they wake them up at the crack of dawn to get them into a roller set and spackle their faces with makeup. And don't forget the spray tans, waxing, and endless hours of practicing they put them through before they even get to the Econo Lodge banquet room. I think what makes it worse is that even after the shows air, mothers like June-the-Hutt up there seem to stay completely oblivious to the fact that they're a sideshow of bat shit. Maybe it's the heat of the South, or all those years of breathing in Aqua Net fumes. Maybe there's lead in possum. Who knows. I just feel sorry for those kids.
FATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT is not pretty at that stage!
She is the evil little girl in that Truman Capote story. I think it is called Children on their Birthdays.
http://burning-plastic.tumblr.com/
Crawford67 on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 5:43pm.
Jeez....That bitch is Bogarting all the chins!
LMFAO!
Dayum. The mom's arms are all purple and discolored. That is some seriously bad circulation. She's going to croak before honey boo boo chile hits puberty. :\
Submitted by pohyah on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 5:53pm.
Question. Is her orca whale mother Asian or is it that her cheek fat has scrunched up her face to make her look like she has stereotypical Asiatic eyes?....yikes I guess that sounds horribly racist. Sorry if anyone is offended. My bad!
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That's just Southern fat at it's finest.
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 5:24pm.
Submitted by ponchiks on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 4:54pm.
Submitted by annobanano on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 4:36pm.
I made Whamo laugh *dies happy*
I didn't know there was DNA in my ass!
It's obvious that the mother and child in the middle are morbidly obese. Is obesity considered beautiful now? If not, why is the child in a "beauty" pagent?
Lol, Alanah is awesome. Jacked up on her Go Go juice. A dolla makes her holla! Question. Is her orca whale mother Asian or is it that her cheek fat has scrunched up her face to make her look like she has stereotypical Asiatic eyes?....yikes I guess that sounds horribly racist. Sorry if anyone is offended. My bad!
I do Pagents!
Jeez....That bitch is Bogarting all the chins!
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Somehow I feel that the fabric of space and time has wrinkled and we're seeing different parts of Courtney Stodden's life cycle.
FYI: that fat bitch is either 28 or 29!
Their house is hoarded because she calls herself "The Coupon Queen" and has ceiling-high shelving units with thousands of itmes displayed like a SAMs Club in their house. It's much cleaner than you'd expect from that unkempt obese cow!
I'm going to stick my head in the oven now and turn the gas on high for knowing that much about them....
Submitted by moomarse on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 5:14pm.
I want to see a show with all these little brats in about 10 years.....
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Just go to your local truck stop and ask for a lot lizard, I'm sure anyone of them will be there. Their mothers will be sitting in the restaurant eating their third slice of Boston cream pie and keeping an eye on their little ho's to make sure they don't try and slip any money in their CFM boots. They can't hide the money in their bras or panties cause they ain't gonna be wearing any.
Is this the same brat Joel shows on The Soup, with the train tracks running through the yard?
Submitted by ponchiks on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 4:54pm.
Submitted by annobanano on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 4:36pm.
@ Whamo - Some of these moms are obviously living vicariously through their daughters, but where the hell are the dads? What dad would be proud of this?
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My guess is it's so that they wouldn't have to fuck their nasty wives. And I could just bet that the fattyfatfatfat here makes her husband to lick all the crease-cheese out of her fat folds before the sexy times as well.
I didn't know there was DNA in my ass!
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EEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWW....Crease-cheese!!
I didn't know there was DNA in my ass
LMFAO, That's some funny ass stuff right there ponch!
June the Hutt! LMFAO! I think Jabba might be feeling a little insulted.
@annobanano - that has to be a very strong spatula if she can move that amount of flesh out of the way.
Now I'm sorry I wondered about it. She probably stinks to high heaven.
WHY?!?!
Do other countries do this disgusting shit or is this just a Uhmurican thing? Can we put all of these fuckers on a plane and send them to Iran?
The United States is going to complete shit and I for one am embarrassed to share US citizenship with these shit excuses for mothers.
I propose we start our own country for decent people like us D-Listers and have extremely strict rules to gain citizenship, like absolutely none of this pageant mom fuckery for one.
We can call it D-Land and Michael can be our Queen.
I want to see a show with all these little brats in about 10 years.......
I wonder how many will kill their parents beforehand.... I would.
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"When I'm ready to get off, I'll get off"
I'd love for Giselle B to wake up one morning and look like the mom.
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Dale Doback: Okay, here's the shot out of the cannon: Oprah, Barbara Walters, your wife. You gotta fuck one, marry one, kill one, go!
Someone asked about the Dad of honey boo boo- he's missing like half his teeth and can barely talk he has such a strong hick accent, he is pretty sad. He seems like he actually thinks this is good for HBB, June the Hut is clearly in charge as are most of the women on these shows. The Dads balls are totally chopped in all the shows I've seen but seriously this is a small town, low IQ, Hicksville phenomenon. They don't have pageant kids from Manhattan. One of the pageants was held in Austin where I'm from, I almost died.
Pls don't ask the obv question:why the fuck was I watching this show in the dirt goddamn place.
Kissing Ass and Cupping Balls. You're Welcome.