Hot Slut Of The Day!

Malachy, the Fizzgig from Dark Crystal who disguised himself as a Pekingese to enter The 2012 Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show. Malachy went on to win that shit, so bow down to our newest top bitch beauty.

At MSG in NYC last night, RuPaul slid up to the head throne at the judge’s table, eyed all the done up bitches before her and declared that may the best BITCH win before she ordered all of them to SNIFF ASS FOR THEIR LIIIIIIIVES. (I wish it went down like that.) After hot bitch after hot bitch primped and puckered in front of the judge, the Best in Show crown went to Malachy, the 4-year-old Pekingese who came in second last year. Malachy beat out over 2,000 dogs including Martha Stewart’s precious Chow Chow Ghenghis Khan II (or as I call it, Ghenghis I Khant With That Name) who won its breed.

You know, I wasn’t so sure about this decision until I asked myself, “If you opened up your vacuum’s bag and instead of seeing balls of hair from your own dog, you saw Malachy’s face staring back at you, would you fall in love?” I mean, who can deny a dog who looks like Beyonce’s wig on a leash?

Congratulations, Malachy! You earned it bitch. Actually, who ever did Malachy’s blow out earned it, but I’m sure he’ll throw them a few coins from his prize money.