Robert Downey Jr. Is A Dad Again

February 7, 2012 / Posted by:

In a hospital room in L.A. somewhere, a newborn baby is staring into the face of Iron Man while secretly wishing that his daddy will introduce him to ScarJo’s magnificent chichi balls. People says that Robert Downey Jr.’s wife Susan birthed out a 7lb 5oz, 20-inch long (because I know you were wondering how long their baby is) baby son in L.A. this morning. RDJ has been Sherlock Holmes for way too long, because the motherfucker thinks he’s British now. RDJ and Susan named their new baby friend Exton Elias. EXTON ELIAS. Exton is going to coo in a British accent, will force his nanny to push his stroller on the left side of the sidewalk and has probably already been knighted as a Sir by Queen Elizabeth.

Exton is RDJ and Susan’s first kid together. He has an 18-year-old son named Indio. RDJ’s rep said this generic shit to People:

“Everyone is healthy and they couldn’t be happier.”

Just once I’d like the rep to say that everyone is sick, miserable and hating each other.

When I say the name “Exton” out loud, it sort of sounds like the name of a driver on Downton Abbey or like the name of a rejected Harry Potter character. But when I say it in my head, it sounds like the name of a discount oil company that is hoping cross-eyed hos and drunk bitches mistake the name of their gas station for EXXON. And you know the kids are going to call him Sexton.

Our commenting rules: Don't be racist or bigoted, or post comments like "Who cares?", or have multiple accounts, or repost a comment that was deleted by a mod, or post NSFW pics/videos/GIFs, or go off topic when not in an Open Post, or post paparazzi/event/red carpet pics from photo agencies due to copyright infringement issues. Also, promoting adblockers, your website, or your forum is not allowed. Breaking a rule may result in your Disqus account getting permanently or temporarily banned. New commenters must go through a period of pre-moderation. And some posts may be pre-moderated so it could take a minute for your comment to appear if it's approved. If you have a question or an issue with comments, email: michaelk@dlisted.com

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >