Kim Kuntrashian Might Be Hittin This

Since Kim Kardashian is trying to beat the jockstrap’s record by wrapping herself around as many professional athlete dicks as possible, she has apparently started down low fucking on Mark Sanchez, the quarterback for the New York Jets. The sports blog Terez Owens (via Radar) is hearing that Kim clamped her ham hocks around Mark while filming the first season of Kourtney & Kim Take It Up The Ass and they recently started up again. Mark has a girlfriend, but that hasn’t stopped him from trying to conquer Kim’s Mount Doom ass whenever they’re in the same city. The source put it like this:

“Kim and Mark like to meet in hotels for dinner dates and flings. Whenever Kim is in New York, they hang out. They are very careful with not being seen together, Mark is seeing someone!”

Okay, the source lost me at “very careful with not being seen together.” Kim not wanting to be seen is like Khloe not wanting to drag a small dog by the neck up to her den in the hills every time she sees one. It’s instinct! Kim isn’t powered by a beating heart and working internal organs like us. Bitch gets her energy from eyes looking at her and cameras flashing at her. That’s how she feeds the dark orb in her chest. And wasn’t Mark Sanchez recently caught doing a 17-year-old or something? And before that he was doing Hayden Pantyairs who looks like one of the boys from The Sandalot with tits. Kim’s second face is younger than a preteen, but she’s over 30, so I don’t think she’s the kind Mark pulls his peen out for. Pimp Mama Kris needs to do her research before she leaks fake stories.

Here’s Kim walking around Miami last night while looking like a sweet and sour chicken wing.