In their ongoing battle to see who can be the biggest cunt in all the land, Madge has just jumped a million spaces ahead of Elton John with one little quote to Newsweek about her ticket prices. If you’ve ever complained about paying $300 to see Madge rub the dick muscle on her armpit (that is a dick growing out of her armpit, right?) against an 18-year-old backup dancer, then shut your mouth. Start saving your coins by only eating tap water and ketchup packets for the next ten months, because she’s worth it. Newsweek asked Madge what she thinks about her fans complaining that her ticket prices cost more than some people’s monthly car payment and the cunt angels sang her name when she said this:
“So start saving your pennies now. People spend $300 on crazy things all the time, things like handbags. So work all year, scrape the money together, and come to my show. I’m worth it.”
HAHAHAHAHAHA. I love that even IN THIS ECONOMY, Madge is still a solid gold bitch to the 99%. But she does bring up a good point. Would you rather spend $300 on a leather bag you get to keep forever or do you want to spend $300 on watching a plastic bag thrust around a stage for 90 minutes. That’s like a Sophie’s Choice between a kitten and a Kardashian. But keep hustlin’, Madge.
And here’s Madge at a Super Bowl press conference today. If you’re going to watch her halftime show, don’t be surprised if a $300 charge shows up on your cable bill with the note: “I’m worth it. xo Madge”.