Multi-millionaire supermodel Gisele Bundchen went to the e-mail room in her $20 million custom built dream mansion and wrote a note to her family and friends asking them to ask the lord above to help her multi-millionaire quarterback husband win his fourth Super Bowl ring on Sunday. The New York Post somehow got a hold of the e-mail (SPOILER ALERT: They prayed for it) and published it on their cover this morning:
My sweet friends and family,
This sunday will be a really important day in my husband’s life. He and his team worked so hard to get to this point and now they need us more than ever to send them positive energy so they can fulfill their dream of winning this super bowl . . .
I feel Tommy really needs our prayer, our support and love at this time.
So I kindly ask all of you to join me on this positive chain and pray for him, so he can feel confident, healthy and strong. Envision him happy and fulfilled experiencing with his team a victory this sunday.
Thank you for your love and support. Love, G :)”
What a selfish bitch. Doesn’t Gis know that it’s award season? It’s God’s busiest time of year, even busier than Christmas (side note: Does God call Christmas “Sonmas“?)! God doesn’t have time to listen to Gis’ family, because he’s too busy sending “you’re welcome” cards to all the actors and musicians who thanked him in their speeches. Oh, Gis.
But seriously, I would say a prayer for Tommy on Gis’ behalf, but I’ve used up all my prayers today on a much more important matter. I’ve been praying that if the woman in this NSFW vintage news clip hasn’t gotten what she was wishing for, that she gets it soon.
(Thanks to everybody who sent this in)