QOTD: Fran Drescher Was Abducted By Aliens
Fran Drescher and her ex-husband Peter (the one who ended their marriage after declaring his undying love for peen) both have the same kind of scar on the same spot and that could only mean one thing: they were both kidnapped by aliens, microchipped and programmed to meet each other. Obviously. Fran tells HuffPo that when she was in junior high school, the aliens beamed her up into their spaceship and tagged her ass. It's like the recurring wet dream that Tommy Girl wishes would become real life.
"You know, it's funny because Peter and I both saw [aliens] before we knew each other, doing the same thing, driving on the road with our dads. We were both in junior high. A few years later, we met, and we realized that we had the same experience. I think that somehow we were programmed to meet. We both have this scar. It's the exact same scar on the exact same spot."
I bet that when the aliens shimmied the chip up under her skin, Fran let out one of her ear hair-burning laughs and the aliens immediately dropped her back on earth before vowing to never subject themselves to torture like that again. Fran single-handedly saved us from an alien invasion! But seriously, Fran and Peter weren't TAKEN. Those bitches just did way too many whip-its and freebased way too many spices in junior high school. That scar is probably from a bong burn. I'm sure Demi Moore is also telling her therapist that she was abducted by damn aliens.
• 
yaya, anally violated, etc, ad nausem. whatever.
------------------------------------------------
Screw you guys, I'm going home!
Didn't he witness her being raped? I'm not gonna hate cause PTS can manifest some bizarre shit. And I'm still waiting for 'Beautician and the Beast' to stream.
When I was in 7th grade, my class took a trip to Marfa, TX to see the unexplained lights. One girl started freaking out and crying about how she was abducted by aliens when she was 3 and was scared that they were coming back for her. 15 years later I haven't forgotten that moment. I never will. HAHA!
On topic: Fran is cray.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Douchechill!
You know, I almost would have rather heard her say she'd joined Scientology.
Her voice is like nails on a chalk board to me.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Mon, 01/30/2012 - 2:17pm.
She was then quoted as saying:
"Last night, Darth Vader came down from the planet Vulcan and told me if I didn't ask Lorraine to the Enchanted Under the Sea dance, that he would melt my brain..."
--------------------------
Jack, you need to get out more.
Submitted by Mama Bear on Mon, 01/30/2012 - 2:19pm.
I didn't know that the husband left her for dick.
^^^^^^^^^^^
He didn't. He left her for Tom and Harry.
{{{GONG}}}
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Did the aliens come back for her 60,000 mile service check and tighten up her face? She's looking a little Asian these days.
Do I read this correctly that she turned her husband gay?
Submitted by Message In A Bottle on Mon, 01/30/2012 - 2:16pm.
"people thought I was fucking Snookie."
------------------
LOL
_____________________________________________
"The English are horrible and Oprah is a moron." 01/10/12 the refined Brit, clairey claire
I didn't know that the husband left her for dick.
She was then quoted as saying:
"Last night, Darth Vader came down from the planet Vulcan and told me if I didn't ask Lorraine to the Enchanted Under the Sea dance, that he would melt my brain..."
_____________________________________________
"The English are horrible and Oprah is a moron." 01/10/12 the refined Brit, clairey claire
I don't care how crazy she is, Fran Fine can do no wrong in my eyes and has a special place in my heart!
(Although when I went as Fran Fine for Halloween at the restaurant I worked at and spoke in her infamous Fran voice, people thought I was fucking Snookie.)
-----------------------------------------------
"The older you get, the wiser you get...unless you're a banana!" - Rose Nylund
isnt that the Illuminati thing where they drug you and make you believe stuff or in reality that means that she either did a lot of drugs or she was in a mental institution take your pick
"I will pee myself today and when someone asks, "what is that smell?", I will happily tell them Veluptuous by KK!" Urmomma
Am I the only one reading this quote in her fucked up screechy voice, hearing the word "because" as "beekoyse"? No? Good.
First Charo 2, now Fran Drescher. *stabs both eardrums with a spork*
****************************************************
"Uh, hello, room service? I'd like some bacon, a couple of Cokes, and a bunch of whores." -Butthead, of Beavis and Butthead
*facepalm*
**************************************************************
You really have to side clap and pucker for a piece who can stand next to a white feather and out-gay it. - MK 8/3/2011
She is a shameless self-promoter and the voice is a bit much but I've always thought old Fran was kind of a hottie.
--------------------------------------------------
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Thu, 01/19/2012 - 11:56am.
Liver spotted hand
Groping while I cry inside
Merit badge and meth
Sorry, Jack. She sounds nothing like a Yankee. She's from Noo Yawk.
This is what happens when a D-List celeb decides she wants to publicity.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Wonder if thats how she get THAT VOICE? btw - that's what snowy sounds like - all yankee and shit.
*passes Fran her meds*
*probes her*
_____________________________________________
"The English are horrible and Oprah is a moron." 01/10/12 the refined Brit, clairey claire
Whaaaa??
******************
Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.